Banfili
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« Reply #1375 on: May 19, 2013, 03:01:49 am » |
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Just trying to explain!
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Kat
Deck Hand
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« Reply #1376 on: May 20, 2013, 07:47:51 am » |
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Choosing between brass door knobs for a walking stick - when the only place I walk to is the supermarket. Learning to keep a monocle properly in place.
Oh. That is simple. Use superglue.  pfft, that's the softcore steampunk method. Real steampunks use rivets. Having to sleep on one's side to prevent ruffling one's mohawk But we're talking about a lady here, Mr. Hazard. Surely you'll see that rivets are not in keeping with the latest fashion from Paris. Haha, well I admit, neither super glue nor rivets sound like a very appealing method of keeping a monocle upon my face.
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A steampunk webcomic about life, death, and lack there of: Perpetual Flux

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grimnir
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« Reply #1377 on: May 20, 2013, 10:07:58 am » |
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Yes, we don't tan in Britain so much as rust.
FINALLY!!! Now I know why all the chavs are orange, they rusted!
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Kindest regards, Raven 
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grimnir
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« Reply #1378 on: May 20, 2013, 11:33:38 am » |
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Realising that you've run out of leather thong.
Could be worse, could've run out in a leather thong!
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Mercury Wells
Rogue Ætherlord

I insiste that you do call me WELLS. :)
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« Reply #1379 on: May 22, 2013, 03:39:32 am » |
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Realising that you've run out of leather thong.
Could be worse, could've run out in a leather thong! Just a single flip-flop then?
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Oh...my old war wound? I got that at The Battle of Dorking. Very nasty affair that was, I can tell you. The Ministry of Tea respectfully advises you to drink one cup of tea day...for that +5 Moral Fibre stat.
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grimnir
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« Reply #1380 on: May 22, 2013, 03:50:18 am » |
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Realising that you've run out of leather thong.
Could be worse, could've run out in a leather thong! Just a single flip-flop then? LOL I'm a pom so to me a thong is still what Aussies call a g-string
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Mrs.EP
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« Reply #1381 on: May 22, 2013, 08:29:21 pm » |
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Not strictly steampunk, but it was surprisingly hard to find the correct spelling of the word Arbalist(A person who fires crossbows, because gunner sounds stupid in this case). Everything thinks I'm trying to look up the word 'Arborist' and there's no longer a way to tell google 'yes, this is the word I'm looking for.'
there is still a way to tell google 'yes, this is the word I'm looking for.', just hidden: you need to click on "search tools" (below the searchbar, after web, images, maps, shopping, more), then "all results" and from there select "Verbatim"
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Sorontar
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« Reply #1382 on: May 23, 2013, 01:24:39 am » |
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Not strictly steampunk, but it was surprisingly hard to find the correct spelling of the word Arbalist(A person who fires crossbows, because gunner sounds stupid in this case). Everything thinks I'm trying to look up the word 'Arborist' and there's no longer a way to tell google 'yes, this is the word I'm looking for.'
there is still a way to tell google 'yes, this is the word I'm looking for.', just hidden: you need to click on "search tools" (below the searchbar, after web, images, maps, shopping, more), then "all results" and from there select "Verbatim" Or add -arborist to your search terms and it will penalise pages that match that term. Sorontar
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Sorontar, Captain of 'The Aethereal Dancer' Advisor to HM Engineers on matters aethereal, aeronautic and cosmographic http://eyrie.sorontar.com
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Dr. Madd
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« Reply #1383 on: November 06, 2013, 11:25:16 am » |
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How about this one- when having relatives over to clean my house.
My niece: Uncle Madd, where does this rattlesnake rattle in a jar go?
Me: On the same shelf with the pickled leeches and grave dirt of course.
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What do we want? Decapitations!
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Arabella Periscope
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« Reply #1384 on: November 07, 2013, 05:26:25 am » |
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My relatives have never offered to come over and clean my house. Is this a problem Steampunks have that I am missing out on?
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Kenneth: 'If you're so hot, you can tell me how to say she has ideas above her station.' Brian:'Oh yes, I forgot. It's fairly easy, old boy. Elle a des idees au-dessus de sa gare.' Kenneth: 'Idiot. It's not that kind of station.'
Terence Rattigan 'French Without Tears.'
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MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
 United States
"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"
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« Reply #1385 on: November 07, 2013, 06:03:55 am » |
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Could be. Mom refuses to do more than use the computer in my room. "I'm afraid of what I might find on an upper shelf somewhere."
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Walk softly and carry a big banjo...
""quid statis aspicientes in infernum"
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Sorontar
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« Reply #1386 on: November 07, 2013, 06:05:11 am » |
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Cleaning allows you to discover things you forgot you had and had originally planned for a project, so you can now place them on a new pile of things to use for a new project that you will discover later.
Sorontar
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WinterHaven
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« Reply #1387 on: November 07, 2013, 11:23:56 am » |
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How about this one- when having relatives over to clean my house.
Hang on - I can't get the people who live in my house to clean it, I must be doing something wrong. But anyway- problem: No available minion to pin up my bustle and having to do it myself whilst wearing said bustle. leads to: Unlevel bustle poufs. (Although they balance out when I strike a 'sexy independent woman' pose. Is that why steampunk ladies all stand so well?)
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'If you were going to make a ghost-trap, how would you set about it? -particularly if you had not even a small ghost to practice on.' -Wyndham
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WinterHaven
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« Reply #1388 on: November 18, 2013, 10:08:58 pm » |
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Several people have complained about walking sticks crashing to the ground, a problem I am familiar with as a friend uses one all the time. It got me thinking, here in Spain we have these nifty little devices for hanging your handbag off the table with. I have never seen them anywhere else, and I am wondering if they could be adapted. I am sending her one for testing purposes as I don't have a stick available to try it out with. I am sorry I still haven't figured out how to get photos in, the link works if you right click on it. 
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SteamBlast Mary
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« Reply #1389 on: November 18, 2013, 10:57:54 pm » |
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Upon such occasion as when a lady invites her Steampunk Gentleman friend into her boudoir for a bit of hanky-panky, said gentleman will: remove his jacket, hang it up; remove waistcoat and fiddle around to place on the hanger underneath the jacket already placed on it, remove braces, place them somewhere conspicuous, (possibly knocking firth hanger off, which requires all garments to be re-hung); remove trousers, hunt around to find a padded hanger to stow them on so they don't get an unsightly crease at knee-level, remove shirt, hunt around for ANOTHER hanger...
... by which time, the lady has probably forgotten what's supposed to be going on and nodded off.
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'I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night’
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von Corax
Squire of the Lambda Calculus
Board Moderator
Immortal

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Prof. Darwin Prætorius von Corax
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« Reply #1390 on: November 18, 2013, 11:17:33 pm » |
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Upon such occasion as when a lady invites her Steampunk Gentleman friend into her boudoir for a bit of hanky-panky, said gentleman will: remove his jacket, hang it up; remove waistcoat and fiddle around to place on the hanger underneath the jacket already placed on it, remove braces, place them somewhere conspicuous, (possibly knocking firth hanger off, which requires all garments to be re-hung); remove trousers, hunt around to find a padded hanger to stow them on so they don't get an unsightly crease at knee-level, remove shirt, hunt around for ANOTHER hanger...
... by which time, the lady has probably forgotten what's supposed to be going on and nodded off.
Seems like a convincing argument in favour of nudism...
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By the power of caffeine do I set my mind in motion By the Beans of Life do my thoughts acquire speed My hands acquire a shaking The shaking becomes a warning By the power of caffeine do I set my mind in motion The Leverkusen Institute of Paleocybernetics is 5838 km from Reading
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Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
 United Kingdom
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« Reply #1391 on: November 18, 2013, 11:20:04 pm » |
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Several people have complained about walking sticks crashing to the ground, a problem I am familiar with as a friend uses one all the time. It got me thinking, here in Spain we have these nifty little devices for hanging your handbag off the table with. I have never seen them anywhere else, and I am wondering if they could be adapted. I am sending her one for testing purposes as I don't have a stick available to try it out with. I am sorry I still haven't figured out how to get photos in, the link works if you right click on it.  I am aware of them, and they are available over here I believe, if not exactly commonplace. http://www.flickr.com/photos/102972336@N05/sets/72157637815717535/There we go, link to the album sorted if not pictures.
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I made a note in my diary on the way over here. Simply says; "Bugger!"
"DON'T THINK OF IT AS DYING, JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH."
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Lord Pentecost
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« Reply #1392 on: November 26, 2013, 09:28:07 pm » |
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Being asked in Halfords what car the part is for when the assistant is trying to be helpful and having to explain what you actually want it for.
Getting a very strange look in a charity shop after buying the weirdest thing in there (a Boyles Law Aparatus) and asking the assistant "do you have anything else like this in the back"
Getting an even stranger look from work colleagues for asking the builders if there is any chance of having the hardwood door frames they are ripping out!
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"A lot of people never use their initiative because no-one told them to" - Banksy
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VampirateMace
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« Reply #1393 on: November 26, 2013, 11:51:17 pm » |
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Lord Pentecost: This is why I like being an artist professionally. When I told my boss I was just going to fish the electrical wire scraps out of the wheelbarrow full of stuff headed for the dump, he just said, "okay."
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Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
 United Kingdom
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« Reply #1394 on: November 27, 2013, 01:02:49 pm » |
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Slipping with the razor while shaving and taking a chunk out of one's facial hair (and then having to shave the other side to match).
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Vagabond GentleMan
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« Reply #1395 on: November 29, 2013, 08:01:58 pm » |
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Always having curious passer-byes nigh demand a label to describe one's style or ensemble.
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Well that wolf has a dimber bonebox, and he'll flash it all milky and red. But you won't see our Red Jack's spit, nug, cuz he's pinked ya, and yer dead.
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FenrisWolf
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« Reply #1396 on: November 29, 2013, 09:52:00 pm » |
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Mien Gott..! That is brilliant. Who do I throw my money at?
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Fenris Wolf Iconographic Capturer of Ætheric Personalities™ www.fenrisoswin.com
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MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
 United States
"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"
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« Reply #1397 on: November 29, 2013, 10:40:05 pm » |
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Always having curious passer-byes nigh demand a label to describe one's style or ensemble.
Yes, all too true. I'm getting a little tired of being asked if I'm a steampunk or a "clockpunk." Lately I just answer, "yes."
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Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
 United Kingdom
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« Reply #1399 on: November 30, 2013, 12:31:22 am » |
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Yes, unfortunately, the only place I can recall seeing them for sale was in a little (and VERY aptly named) curiosity shop in Dorset.
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