The COVID Ridiculousness Thread

[J. Wilhelm]

Dear Ladies and Gentlemen,

We face the fight of our lives. Finally the dystopian future Sci-fi writers predicted has arrived. From sociopathic leaders, war and famine, through to electric cars and reputedly flying passenger drones, we are now experiencing the first major plague of the century. We are living in a science fiction novel. Welcome to the future.

But as humanity navigates these murky waters one must note the degree of ingenuity and sometimes absurdity that people will reach to stay alive. This thread is dedicated to all the wonderful, bizarre, intelligent or silly activities that in a world prior to COVID-19 would have been a source of ridicule.

Welcome to the COVID Ridiculousness Thread.



First stop: FASHION  

The COVID 19 pandemic will not disappear in a couple of months as some would suggest. Doctors speak of months to finish trials for a vaccine, and years of developing new vaccines for all the mutations that SARS Cov 2 will generate over the next few years.

Hence, the face masks that initially we were told were "not useful" will in fact become fashionable, especially among those unfortunate street urchins who must navigate city streets and mass transportation, as opposed to working at home and going to the supermarket in their flying passenger drone. And those lucky enough to fly to the supermarket will still have to wear protective gloves and face masks while in close proximity to other people.

Cybergoth. A has-been fashion from the UK/Germany industrial club scene in the late 90s and early 00s was two decades ahead of it's time. They knew all along...

Vinyl skirts and corsets for both men and women are easy to sanitize, and the outsized "Dreadfalls" and "Cyberlox" hair extensions made from synthetic materials, platform shoes and spikes all over make social distancing a breeze. The bright contrasting colours, same as found in many poisonous animal species in nature, warn passerbys and predators to stay away, or be chemically sprayed with UV reactive capsaicin liquid, capable of bringing an adult to the ground

[J. Wilhelm]

No Pants Day - all year long

Walmart reports people are buying more tops from the clothing department online, but sales of bottoms has slumped. Work at home is blamed for the trend.

CNN: Why Walmart is seeing a rise in sales for tops, but not bottoms during the coronavirus crisis.
https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/27/business/walmart-tops-bottoms-sales-trnd/index.html





Going to the salon or barber

Chinese barbers, and stylists, determined to work through the crisis, but subject to social distancing rules get inventive

‘Long-distance’ haircut amid the coronavirus outbreak in China

[Prof Marvel]

I LOVE IT J

WE NEED MORE HUMOR!


Her is a wonderful mythical tale via online webcomic, for free

A Redtail Dreams
" "A Redtail's Dream" is a webcomic about a young man and his shapeshifting dog on an involuntary journey on the other side of the Bird's Path in the realm of dreams. They have to rescue their fellow Villagers before their souls pass on to Tuonela, the land of eternal sleep.

The comic is now complete, it ran for two years from September 2011 to November 2013, is 556 pages long and available in both English and Finnish. Enjoy reading it, and afterwards you can find my current webcomic over at sssscomic.com.   "
http://www.minnasundberg.fi/artd.php

Her other ongoing webcomic Stand Still Stay Silent is an apocryphal online web comic has proven to be quite... timely?
 Warning, if you don't like horror or are porone to anxiety, skip Stand Still Stay Silent
and read her other nicer complete comic A Redtail's Dream

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Stand Still Stay Silent is an apocryphal online web comic has proven to be quite... timely?
running since 2013...
 

Stand Still Stay Silent
"It's been 90 years after the end of the old world. Most of the surviving population of the Known world live in Iceland,
the largest safe area in existence, while the safe settlements in the other Nordic countries; Norway, Sweden, Denmark
and Finland, are small and scarce.

Countless mysterious and unspoken dangers lurk outside the safe areas, the Silent world, and hunters, mages and cleansers
will spend their lives defending the settlements against the terrifying beings. Because of a great fear towards everything
in the Silent world no official attempts to explore the ruins of the old have been made, and most of the information about
it has turned into ancient lore, known by few.

But now, at last, it is time to send out an research crew into the great unknown! A poorly funded and terribly unqualified
crew, but a crew nonetheless. "

http://www.sssscomic.com/index.php?id=about

yhs
prof marvel

[MWBailey]

Since you've more or less asked for it (apologies for the *ahem* objectionable bits)...

https://youtu.be/AA2r6rca2v4

[J. Wilhelm]

Since you've more or less asked for it (apologies for the *ahem* objectionable bits)...

https://youtu.be/AA2r6rca2v4

Ha! I didn't even know that guy was still doing the same puppet routines. I saw his work many years ago in the late shows.

[Hurricane Annie]

 New Zealand is in Lock Down. A National Emergency has been called. The police are in charge of the public and have extensive powers to enter premises, search and detain. We are being instructed to inform , mark, dob  in neighbours and members of the public that could be subverting the Lock Down. Special online forms are available. [no word of a lie]. Technology is being put in place to track all cell phones, ostensibly so as to trace contacts of those who may contract the virus.  We are constantly being told the military will step in.

 Parliament has been temporarily dissolved. An Epidemic Response Committee  of cross party Members of Parliament has been set up to hold the government accountable. Being that it is election year here , to be held in September, the government is attempting to saturate the media with political propaganda . The Prime Minister will not postpone the election. Television programming is being interrupted daily for her announcements , including her personal podcasts about her homelife.  We are being bombarded with emotive election style slogans  and tag lines.

Inconsistent , contradictory and confusing messages are being put out by the government announcents and official Covid 19 web site. It is creating fear, anxiety and agitation  for the public.There is a general sense of unease and paranoia . People are wearing masks, bandana, balaclava  and sunglasses, protective glasses etc out side the home. Supermarkets have staff in masks and goggles with perspex shields at checkouts . It's mass hysteria with a phobia that the air is contaminated with the virus. Foreigners and those living/ traveling in moblie homes are being  blamed for dreading disease and abused in the street.

 Most folk are staying inside and only leaving  the house for the supermarket or walk around the block . There are a few  persons flouting the regulations . The affluent appear to be above the law. Parties, picnics, surfing, boating, cycling and walking in bands , neighbourhood BBQ,  etc.. police have taken no action.

[J. Wilhelm]

SNIP

Dear Annie, are you sure you want to post this on the comedy thread?

We have a "serious" COVID thread here: http://brassgoggles.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,50885.0.html

[J. Wilhelm]

Art History

Are you a fine arts history buff? Here's something else to do while in quarantine: recreate the masters.'works of art.

Portrait of Arnolfini
https://twitter.com/JemDuducu/status/1244198358236962822?s=20

[Banfili]

Art History

Are you a fine arts history buff? Here's something else to do while in quarantine: recreate the masters.'works of art.

Portrait by Arnolfini
https://twitter.com/JemDuducu/status/1244198358236962822?s=20

Love the, um, light green dress!!

[Miranda.T]

Art History

Are you a fine arts history buff? Here's something else to do while in quarantine: recreate the masters.'works of art.

Portrait by Arnolfini
https://twitter.com/JemDuducu/status/1244198358236962822?s=20

Simply inspired  .

Yours,
Miranda.

[Deimos]

That is, without doubt, one of the funniest posts of the current "plague humour" that I have seen.

In fact, I have already stolen it to send to others.  

[Synistor 303]

I agree with Demios - very funny, and having studied this very painting at Uni, I think the re-creation is better than the original.

[Deimos]

I agree with Demios - very funny, and having studied this very painting at Uni, I think the re-creation is better than the original.

That's pretty funny, too. 

[J. Wilhelm]

Actually, I just found out this is an online challenge started by the Getty Museum in Los Angeles.

You can follow their Twitter account: @GettyMuseum

Madonna and Child Dog


Gender reversed Virgin Mary , Saint Elizabeth, and the Infants John the Baptist and Christ,
but now with more unicorns...


Sign of the times

[James Harrison]

https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2020/mar/30/astrophysicist-gets-magnets-stuck-up-nose-while-inventing-coronavirus-device?fbclid=IwAR3x0BirFdSgaRoCFccI38qEnf2xuntkuvzTLMP30F2IQXT74KurGpYRmkQ

Laudably, he was trying to build something to stop people giving themselves damnable plague.  Unfortunately he didn'tquite think it through.

[J. Wilhelm]

https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2020/mar/30/astrophysicist-gets-magnets-stuck-up-nose-while-inventing-coronavirus-device?fbclid=IwAR3x0BirFdSgaRoCFccI38qEnf2xuntkuvzTLMP30F2IQXT74KurGpYRmkQ

Laudably, he was trying to build something to stop people giving themselves damnable plague.  Unfortunately he didn'tquite think it through.

Wow. Sounds like a Laurel and Hardy sketch. He just kept making it worse.

[J. Wilhelm]

The Mexican version of the opening scenes in the movie 12 Monkeys. *

Family thinks they know what to do with family members who still work when they come back home.

https://mobile.twitter.com/ChumelTorres/status/1244461025769836544

[rovingjack]

[J. Wilhelm]

I Saw this comment on Twitter and I couldn't resist:

We are now leaving the March Epoch and venturing into the April Age which should last a few million years...

[Hurricane Annie]

SNIP

Dear Annie, are you sure you want to post this on the comedy thread?

We have a "serious" COVID thread here: http://brassgoggles.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,50885.0.html

 It could be appropriate on both. New Zealanders live for conspiracy theory and  revel in rebelling against government action

[Banfili]

It could be appropriate on both. New Zealanders live for conspiracy theory and  revel in rebelling against government action

Sounds familiar!

[Hurricane Annie]

It could be appropriate on both. New Zealanders live for conspiracy theory and  revel in rebelling against government action

Sounds familiar!

 If NZer go through all this hassle over the Lock Down  and don't get a few tanks rolling through town  and Airforce search lights , we will feel ripped off

[Hurricane Annie]

 This fellow is a popular New Zealand comedian.  He came to attention making parodies of politcians.  He puts up regular videos of stereo typical social charicactures. He can be quite hilarious at times . Enjoy

https://www.facebook.com/328576614206995/posts/976081582789825/
 

[J. Wilhelm]

Appalled at the news that his governor has re-opened the beaches and many public venues, Florida lawyer Daniel Uhlfelder will visit the beaches dressed as the Grim Reaper in order to warn beachgoers of the ultimate prize they will pay for playing around in the sand.

Daniel Uhlfelder @DWUhlfelderLaw

Many of you have asked if I am willing to travel around Florida wearing Grim Reaper attire to the beaches and other areas of the state opening up prematurely. The answer is absolutely yes. Beginning May 1 we will hit the road here in state. Please retweet and spread the word.

[Sorontar]

A politician suggested that injecting disinfectant into people might be a solution against COVID-19.

Yep, the COVID-19 won't kill you because the injection might (according to the Australian Chief Medical Officer when asked about this). Nice to know who is the expert in these areas.