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Cora Courcelle
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« on: March 21, 2020, 08:31:46 pm » |
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It's such a pleasure to be on this civilised forum at this worrying time, but I must admit some threads on other forums that I occasionally visit can be a source of much amusement (almost certainly unintentional on the part of the original poster).
My favourite so far has got to be 'How many rolls of toilet paper do you use a day'.
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You have to tread a fine line between avant-garde surrealism and getting yourself sectioned...
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von Corax
Squire of the Lambda Calculus
Board Moderator
Immortal
 Canada
Prof. Darwin Prætorius von Corax
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« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2020, 08:58:23 pm » |
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Personally, I just bought toilet paper six months ago or so, so I should be good for a while yet.  |
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By the power of caffeine do I set my mind in motion
By the Beans of Life do my thoughts acquire speed
My hands acquire a shaking
The shaking becomes a warning
By the power of caffeine do I set my mind in motion
The Leverkusen Institute of Paleocybernetics is 5838 km from Reading
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Synistor 303
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« Reply #2 on: March 22, 2020, 02:56:40 am » |
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The spouse worked out it was one and a bit rolls per week per person. Of course this 'depends' (see what I did there...) on how big the rolls are, what ply they are and how tightly they are wound... Still, I have been looking at some of the 'food' (snacks, 'feasts' etc) pictures being posted online and I would say from the quality of it (zero green-stuff, lots of fried carbs, cheesy muck and fibre-less bread) that many people would be suffering constipation, so would use less than that...
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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
 United States
Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple
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« Reply #3 on: March 22, 2020, 06:31:50 pm » |
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3 little stones work just fine. Or you can do what the Romans did. A sponge dipped in vinegar   |
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Rockula
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
 United Kingdom
Nothing beats a good hat.
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« Reply #4 on: March 22, 2020, 08:28:31 pm » |
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If you're self isolating at home and you have a shower in your bathroom I'm not sure you need any at all.
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The legs have fallen off my Victorian Lady...
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Synistor 303
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« Reply #5 on: March 23, 2020, 12:22:32 am » |
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If you're self isolating at home and you have a shower in your bathroom I'm not sure you need any at all.
Hmm... thanks for that image, Rockula, now each time I see a shower I will never be able to get it out of my head... |
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MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
United States
"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"
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« Reply #6 on: March 26, 2020, 02:14:31 am » |
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If you're self isolating at home and you have a shower in your bathroom I'm not sure you need any at all.
*taking notes* |
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Walk softly and carry a big banjo...
""quid statis aspicientes in infernum"
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Prof Marvel
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« Reply #7 on: March 26, 2020, 05:18:37 am » |
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We just got one of these Swash CL950 Bidet Toilet Seat , heated water, warm air drier   Along with a new powerflush toilet that will flush a bucket of billiard balls... so when I get these installed our TP usage will drop dramatically... yhs prof marvel |
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The world is in Hell and I am too depressed for words
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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
United States
Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple
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« Reply #8 on: March 26, 2020, 09:00:46 am » |
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Prof Marvel
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« Reply #9 on: March 26, 2020, 09:30:41 am » |
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Oh now thats just TOO funny! yhs prf mvl |
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MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
United States
"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"
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« Reply #10 on: March 26, 2020, 06:30:19 pm » |
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Oh now thats just TOO funny! yhs prf mvl You mean he wasn't serious?!? Well, dangit... |
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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
United States
Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple
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« Reply #11 on: March 26, 2020, 07:55:40 pm » |
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Oh now thats just TOO funny! yhs prf mvl You mean he wasn't serious?!? Well, dangit... Is that why the neighbors called the cops? |
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« Last Edit: March 27, 2020, 05:50:09 am by J. Wilhelm »
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Banfili
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« Reply #12 on: March 26, 2020, 10:20:37 pm » |
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We are so weird - isn't that grand!
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Synistor 303
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« Reply #13 on: March 27, 2020, 12:07:08 am » |
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I considered doing that, but it is autumn here and the acorns are dropping with their sharp little hat things onto the grass, and it's bad enough treading on them, let along butt draggin' on them... |
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Mercury Wells
Rogue Ætherlord
I insiste that you do call me WELLS. :)
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« Reply #14 on: March 27, 2020, 12:13:23 am » |
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I considered doing that, but it is autumn here and the acorns are dropping with their sharp little hat things onto the grass, and it's bad enough treading on them, let along butt draggin' on them... At least you're not dragging your arse over open pine cones  |
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Oh...my old war wound? I got that at The Battle of Dorking. Very nasty affair that was, I can tell you. The Ministry of Tea respectfully advises you to drink one cup of tea day...for that +5 Moral Fibre stat. |
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Prof Marvel
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« Reply #15 on: March 27, 2020, 05:01:10 am » |
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 yhs prof shopper |
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Prof Marvel
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« Reply #16 on: March 27, 2020, 05:10:28 am » |
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 yhs prof fortified |
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Sir Henry
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« Reply #17 on: March 27, 2020, 07:17:53 pm » |
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My favourite image of the lockdown so far:  I know I shouldn't laugh, but... |
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I speak in syllabubbles. They rise to the surface by the force of levity and pop out of my mouth unneeded and unheeded.
Cry "Have at!" and let's lick the togs of Waugh!
Arsed not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for tea.
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Sorontar
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« Reply #18 on: March 28, 2020, 03:01:56 am » |
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yhs prof fortified Houses cost alot in Melbourne. Sorontar |
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Sorontar, Captain of 'The Aethereal Dancer' Advisor to HM Engineers on matters aethereal, aeronautic and cosmographic http://eyrie.sorontar.com |
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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
United States
Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple
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« Reply #19 on: March 28, 2020, 06:00:02 am » |
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yhs prof shopper You might bump into Charlie Brown |
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Melrose
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« Reply #20 on: March 28, 2020, 10:39:46 am » |
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I'm not worried about toilet paper shortages. Bought a leaf-blower recently...
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SeVeNeVeS
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« Reply #21 on: March 28, 2020, 10:49:08 am » |
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All this discussion about bog roll or the lack of reminded me of VIZ........  |
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Wormster
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« Reply #22 on: March 29, 2020, 12:05:17 am » |
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I just think of all of those who are suffering from an infestation of piles!
(makes teh eyes water!!)
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Tread softly and carry a GBFO stick!
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MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
United States
"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"
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« Reply #23 on: March 29, 2020, 12:38:02 am » |
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Oh now thats just TOO funny! yhs prf mvl You mean he wasn't serious?!? Well, dangit... Is that why the neighbors called the cops? No, I think that was because of my fiddle playing... |
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Sorontar
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« Reply #24 on: March 29, 2020, 03:23:11 am » |
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I just think of all of those who are suffering from an infestation of piles!
(makes teh eyes water!!)
Piles of toilet paper, you mean. Sorontar |
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