Any commander worth his stripes will tell you that lady luck plays a decisive role on any battlefield- the best battle plans, the finest armaments and the most advanced war machines will be of little use to an army whom misfortune has favored. Now, the exceptional weapons-crafters of Lunchwaiste and Sons have harnessed misfortune itself in the
Lugubrious Spite Rifle, a long-range hex-caster that can allow a skilled marksman to precisely strike a target up to 2,000 yards.
Once a target is in their sights, the marksman simply selects which misfortune they would like to inflict, and the target will very soon find itself the subject of strife, misery and woe. Precise mechanical insertion of a slender probe into the appropriate region of the A.H.P. (Anatomical Hoodoo Proxy) will guarantee the target suffers an appropriate fate, including Addlebrainedness, Infirmity of the Loins, Rhythmic Flatulence or even Forcible Spleen Evacuation.

