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Author Topic: Dragon Tamers - A room for those of us with anxiety / depression / etc  (Read 127316 times)
J. Wilhelm
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« Reply #1750 on: March 29, 2020, 03:45:50 am »

starting to feel the stress of working as a cashier and stocker for an essential store, during a pandemic, which the public seems incapable of grasping how to adapt to. watching people lick their fingers to seperate their bills they are paying for their groceries with, people coming in and trying to hoard certain products and getting nasty when you limit them.

I've got chronic health concerns that are not happy with the diet changes I've had to adapt because panicky nutters wipe out whole sections of every store in the state. So I'm at increased risk. and my landlord/friends downstairs are as well. They have been avoiding me, and frankly I don't blame them. I'm constantly in close proximity to the public, who now are coming in to just shop around because they married and had kids they can't stand with somebody they cannot tolerate being around all day every day. And half have lost their jobs and their kids are out of school.

Old ladies and men from the elder home in the area come in to walk and shop around because they can't deal with being cooped up...

every day feels like a game of russian roulette. I feel like I might just bow out in a few days if other people don't start changing their behaviours. Even then I might opt out. And if I do leave, I'd still have to quarantine for 14-17 days just to make sure I'm not a hazard to anyone. at the end of which I'd have to debate whether it would be worth going back to work. Because I know enough, that I know this whole situation is only going to get worse and it won't be better in a month or even two.



Have you though about being a stocker only? It's the only relatively safe job out there right now. It could be worse, like clerk at a pharmacy, where clerks should be now considered to be in the same position as first responders. Hazard pay should be mandatory. HEB supermarkets announced a $2 pay raise to all its employees.

I'm earning a measly 800 per month now, half of what I used to, which was already very low, and I'm still riding the stupid bus that feels even more like Russian roulette. And I am trying to calculate when I'll be quitting, which I don't want to do because then I'll have no idea when I'll earn any money again, but seriously when we hit 1000 cases in Austin, I think I'll have no option. Work at the shop is so slow I don't think it represents a risk any longer, but busses are a death trap. No drivers have turned positive yet though.
« Last Edit: March 29, 2020, 03:49:57 am by J. Wilhelm » Logged

rovingjack
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« Reply #1751 on: March 30, 2020, 12:54:23 am »

aaaand it looks like it's all a moot point now. I'm calling out sick now and need to quarantine for 2 week. Yesterday I was sounding hoarse and felt tired (thought it wasn't enough sleep), and I had a cold about 2 weeks ago that left some lingering effects. But today It fatigued and have a irritating cough that won't go away.

Is it covid19 , we'll probably never know. But even if it's not, I can't go into work sick right now, and being sick is pretty much a required quarantine for 2 weeks everywhere.
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J. Wilhelm
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« Reply #1752 on: March 30, 2020, 05:08:42 pm »

aaaand it looks like it's all a moot point now. I'm calling out sick now and need to quarantine for 2 week. Yesterday I was sounding hoarse and felt tired (thought it wasn't enough sleep), and I had a cold about 2 weeks ago that left some lingering effects. But today It fatigued and have a irritating cough that won't go away.

Is it covid19 , we'll probably never know. But even if it's not, I can't go into work sick right now, and being sick is pretty much a required quarantine for 2 weeks everywhere.

Very sorry to hear that. Not knowing being the worst. Every time my nose drips or I have a hoarse throat (this is allergy season in Austin) I go into a mild panic. Of course no one knows if it's allergy or COVID. One cannot overstate the importance of free massive testing, at the workplace, at the clinics, at, well, everywhere. Without it we are in this mess and entire economies are failing.
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1753 on: April 02, 2020, 03:35:55 am »

Based off of how my lungs hurt and general feeling I'd say it's at least a pneumonia. Now to see if it's coming or going and how long this is going to last.
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Banfili
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« Reply #1754 on: April 02, 2020, 04:01:34 am »

Based off of how my lungs hurt and general feeling I'd say it's at least a pneumonia. Now to see if it's coming or going and how long this is going to last.

If it's pneumonia you nee antibiotics, rovingjack - better get yourself off to a Dr. at least!
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1755 on: April 02, 2020, 04:08:54 am »

antibiotics don't resolve viral pneumonia, and past experience tells me exposure to antibiotics has a good chances of causing more problems than it helps.
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1756 on: April 02, 2020, 04:38:58 am »

I've not really had any real fever yet, and I can draw deep breaths and hold them, so for now I'll see where I am tomorrow and possibly call the doctor by phone.

If I get to any point where breathing is hard, I'm just going straight to the hospital.
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Banfili
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« Reply #1757 on: April 02, 2020, 05:09:22 am »

antibiotics don't resolve viral pneumonia, and past experience tells me exposure to antibiotics has a good chances of causing more problems than it helps.
But if you are harbouring bacterial pneumonia, the longer you leave it the worse you will get -and be more susceptible to viruses!
It's a bit of a balancing act with your other conditions, I know - hard to find the true balance point.
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J. Wilhelm
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« Reply #1758 on: April 02, 2020, 07:21:32 am »

antibiotics don't resolve viral pneumonia, and past experience tells me exposure to antibiotics has a good chances of causing more problems than it helps.
But if you are harbouring bacterial pneumonia, the longer you leave it the worse you will get -and be more susceptible to viruses!
It's a bit of a balancing act with your other conditions, I know - hard to find the true balance point.

As a secondary infection, you mean.... It does happen with this virus, I've heard.

Take care Rovingjack. Sending you good vibes.
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1759 on: April 13, 2020, 04:32:25 am »

I've been debating doing a series of 'pen pal' style videos on Youtube for a kind of social interaction with a human face for those struggling with isolation.

not sure it's of interest to people but I thought I could try it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZguuGtlZ3Oo&lc=Ugxa0bpBTyXPACDlsNF4AaABAg
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1760 on: April 21, 2020, 11:17:21 pm »

I'm back at work, and I'm fine most days, but I know if I over work myself I feel crumby again, some of it may be new allergies (I've never really had seasonal allergies. But I'm finding myself paranoid now of the continued exposure risk of being in public.

and there is no reassurance in the news or social media to be had. Reports today: there is no evidence that those who were infected are granted any immunity. The medicines that they were testing to improve symptoms now seem to have shown an increased risk of death, several mild cases who had recovered at seeing persistent lung damage six weeks after recovery, and doing the maths based on death rates... if we didn't have a single additional infection from now on, and just had the same rate of case closures as we currently have, the world will be less half a million people in about 3 weeks. but we are adding people to the infected rates daily in the thousands.

it's a bit of a mood wrecker, and makes me want to walk away from my job and just stay in seclusion for the rest of the year.
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Banfili
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« Reply #1761 on: April 22, 2020, 02:04:54 am »

I'm back at work, and I'm fine most days, but I know if I over work myself I feel crumby again, some of it may be new allergies (I've never really had seasonal allergies. But I'm finding myself paranoid now of the continued exposure risk of being in public.

and there is no reassurance in the news or social media to be had. Reports today: there is no evidence that those who were infected are granted any immunity. The medicines that they were testing to improve symptoms now seem to have shown an increased risk of death, several mild cases who had recovered at seeing persistent lung damage six weeks after recovery, and doing the maths based on death rates... if we didn't have a single additional infection from now on, and just had the same rate of case closures as we currently have, the world will be less half a million people in about 3 weeks. but we are adding people to the infected rates daily in the thousands.

it's a bit of a mood wrecker, and makes me want to walk away from my job and just stay in seclusion for the rest of the year.

Singapore is now having its "Second Wave" of infection - not reassuring at all.
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J. Wilhelm
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« Reply #1762 on: April 22, 2020, 03:42:47 am »

I'm back at work, and I'm fine most days, but I know if I over work myself I feel crumby again, some of it may be new allergies (I've never really had seasonal allergies. But I'm finding myself paranoid now of the continued exposure risk of being in public.

and there is no reassurance in the news or social media to be had. Reports today: there is no evidence that those who were infected are granted any immunity. The medicines that they were testing to improve symptoms now seem to have shown an increased risk of death, several mild cases who had recovered at seeing persistent lung damage six weeks after recovery, and doing the maths based on death rates... if we didn't have a single additional infection from now on, and just had the same rate of case closures as we currently have, the world will be less half a million people in about 3 weeks. but we are adding people to the infected rates daily in the thousands.

it's a bit of a mood wrecker, and makes me want to walk away from my job and just stay in seclusion for the rest of the year.

Singapore is now having its "Second Wave" of infection - not reassuring at all.


What politicians don't understand is that we are going to have many "waves" of this kind. It's not going to apeace the way they'd like.
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Caledonian
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« Reply #1763 on: April 22, 2020, 07:15:19 pm »

Deleted because I am afraid someone is reading what I post here.
« Last Edit: April 22, 2020, 09:32:17 pm by Caledonian » Logged

I actually know basic clockmaking now!
Banfili
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« Reply #1764 on: April 23, 2020, 12:41:12 am »

Deleted because I am afraid someone is reading what I post here.

We are reading what you post here! Which someone bothers you?
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Cora Courcelle
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« Reply #1765 on: April 23, 2020, 10:25:04 am »

Deleted because I am afraid someone is reading what I post here.

I'm guessing it's someone who is not a BG member, just a watcher, and obviously you don't want them to see how you're feeling.  I really sympathise, because I know how supportive it BG is when we have problems.
Is there anyone you can speak to privately?
Feel free to send me a private message if you need to get something off your mind - can't promise any advice, but I can listen.
(For my own mental health I am limiting the amount of time I spend online so may not reply straight away, I am not ignoring you.)
Have a virtual hug from me.
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You have to tread a fine line between avant-garde surrealism and getting yourself sectioned...
Caledonian
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« Reply #1766 on: April 23, 2020, 10:27:19 am »

i did indeed mean a non-bg member, a family member that has shown to read my stuff online before.  I appreciate you people's  support, though. thank you.
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1767 on: May 14, 2020, 07:12:45 am »

I tried making videos to reach out to folks struggling with isolation, nobody seemed to care, so I stopped. I'm not sure what bothered me most, that nobody was interested, or that I stopped trying.
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MWBailey
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« Reply #1768 on: May 22, 2020, 09:00:48 am »

I tried making videos to reach out to folks struggling with isolation, nobody seemed to care, so I stopped. I'm not sure what bothered me most, that nobody was interested, or that I stopped trying.




I wouldn't say they're/we're not interested; probably most were or are like me, in that they probably felt that they would probably be butting into a conversation that was/is not really meant for them. Us introverts and "recovering introverts," (such as myself, for example), to coin a term, tend to be like that. 

I mean, yeah, we see your link and all, and to be quite honest, are excited about the possibility of finding somebody new to talk to in realtime or close to it, but we're so used to being on the periphery of things and being seemingly rebuffed by the online and real-world population in general that we're hesitant to overtly reach out in return, thinking something to the effect of, "oh well, sure, but he'll/they'll be swamped with respondents, so best not to add to the confusion." Just trying to be nice and not cause trouble, you understand. Too, there's the fact that although we do pretty well in text, that doesn't always transfer to voice and video. In text, we have time to think and decide what to post and how to say it, and choose what people see as "us." In video, I/you don't really have much choice but to present myself as the alternately tongue-tied, or in-your-face-with-my-banjo-and-fiddle dipswatch that I actually am. I know what a ham I am, and I always tend to think that people sense that, and are put off by  it - so I err on the side of caution.

I'm sorry to hear that you've stopped. I'd like to try, but I seem to not get people's notifications of live events in time to participate, so there's that as well, but still the idea is intriguing.


Addendum:
Also one should consider that suggestions for mental health during Stay-at-Home, Quarantine and Isolation by
the CDC and other entities included staying off of the internet, and especially avoiding social media, where rumors and heavy and/or negative postings would probably prevailMyh own doctor and several religious folks I'm acquainted with remonstratd with me to stop going onto Facebook or forums for fearthe general tone of such might be overly disturbing.

So, perhaps it was not so much disinterest as people being afraid to look at anything associated by title with "Isolation" or COVID, etc. As things ease up, perhaps you'll get more and better responses. I'll be subscribing.
« Last Edit: May 22, 2020, 01:56:18 pm by MWBailey » Logged

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Banfili
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« Reply #1769 on: May 22, 2020, 12:00:22 pm »

I don't 'do' social media at all, apart from my email & this and a music BB, partly because of the Aspergers, and partly because Up here in the mountain bush where I live the best Internet is ADSL2 dialup broadband - so the bandwidth just isn't available to watch videos or music or utube or any of that other streaming stuff. Truth be told, I like it like that!

So, rovingjack, or anyone else who puts up links to videos etc., not ignoring you, just can't watch 'em at all! Same goes for really photo heavy posts, where the photos haven't been converted into a smaller size - the bandwidth just ain't there!
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1770 on: May 24, 2020, 02:17:03 am »

it wasn't really a targetted critique of participation with any given post or site. It's just a frustration I have in general. I am an artsy fartsy type in some regard, and I have friends that say they would love to participate in an active artist collective and everybody is like "yeah that'd be great if there was something like that around." so I create it and invite them all... only to spend week after week sitting alone. I created a game design and playtest group for board games for the same reason... and had some folks who attended regularly for a while before I ended up three month in a row being the only one to show up. Same thing with a makers social group.

Happened with a social activism group, a group for fitness, one for cleaning up local litter as a social activity, a philiosophy group when I was younger. a DnD group. Trying to do something to get people to bake treats and sweets for emergency medical staff and fire and rescue people on days they are available while the rest of us feast and celebrate with family.

So this sort of something I fall for a lot. So when somebody says that wish something existed they could enjoy, and it's something I can make... I always forget the lesson that experience has taught me. People like to imagine how things might be better if only... but they rarely if ever are willing to actually take part, even passively in such a thing if it's actually available. People find a romance to the idea of themselves as an artist or a philosopher or activist who just can't find the time or the community in their area.

I wasn't so much begrudging anyone that didn't interact with or respond to the videos... Just a realisation that days after creating them, the watch counter remained at zero. it made me suspect that I'd fallen for this again.

I mean I can paint without an audiance, make games that nobody ever plays, and generally enjoy the edavor of doing the thing just fine by my self. I could fill closets full of creations that nobody else ever sees. and that's kinda the problem that frustrates me when I fall for this sort of thing over and over. I have a closet full of colorful creations, and a love of creating and genuinely care for other people, and when somebody says they wish they had something colorful and creative going on in their world, I muster up a boat load of ... 'moxie?' to shed my reclusive hermit ways, and not only bring colorful creations and the means for creating more for people but the deep desire to help fan sparks in anyone to create their own colorful creative wonders that I can cheer on and support... Only to sit by myself in some place, clearly like a stood up date, and pack it all up to take it all back to the closet again.

and I'm not even upset that the people didn't come. I still believe in the end that everybody had a wonderfully colorful nebula of creative brilliance in them, and I can be encouraging and help them grow and express that when they are ready to share it. and I don't want to ever not show up when anyone is ready... but I worry that a part of me is starting to expect that showing up is a waste of time just like it always seems to be.
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MWBailey
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« Reply #1771 on: May 25, 2020, 06:01:17 am »

it wasn't really a targetted critique of participation with any given post or site. It's just a frustration I have in general. I am an artsy fartsy type in some regard, and I have friends that say they would love to participate in an active artist collective and everybody is like "yeah that'd be great if there was something like that around." so I create it and invite them all... only to spend week after week sitting alone. I created a game design and playtest group for board games for the same reason... and had some folks who attended regularly for a while before I ended up three month in a row being the only one to show up. Same thing with a makers social group.

Happened with a social activism group, a group for fitness, one for cleaning up local litter as a social activity, a philiosophy group when I was younger. a DnD group. Trying to do something to get people to bake treats and sweets for emergency medical staff and fire and rescue people on days they are available while the rest of us feast and celebrate with family.

So this sort of something I fall for a lot. So when somebody says that wish something existed they could enjoy, and it's something I can make... I always forget the lesson that experience has taught me. People like to imagine how things might be better if only... but they rarely if ever are willing to actually take part, even passively in such a thing if it's actually available. People find a romance to the idea of themselves as an artist or a philosopher or activist who just can't find the time or the community in their area.

I wasn't so much begrudging anyone that didn't interact with or respond to the videos... Just a realisation that days after creating them, the watch counter remained at zero. it made me suspect that I'd fallen for this again.

I mean I can paint without an audiance, make games that nobody ever plays, and generally enjoy the edavor of doing the thing just fine by my self. I could fill closets full of creations that nobody else ever sees. and that's kinda the problem that frustrates me when I fall for this sort of thing over and over. I have a closet full of colorful creations, and a love of creating and genuinely care for other people, and when somebody says they wish they had something colorful and creative going on in their world, I muster up a boat load of ... 'moxie?' to shed my reclusive hermit ways, and not only bring colorful creations and the means for creating more for people but the deep desire to help fan sparks in anyone to create their own colorful creative wonders that I can cheer on and support... Only to sit by myself in some place, clearly like a stood up date, and pack it all up to take it all back to the closet again.

and I'm not even upset that the people didn't come. I still believe in the end that everybody had a wonderfully colorful nebula of creative brilliance in them, and I can be encouraging and help them grow and express that when they are ready to share it. and I don't want to ever not show up when anyone is ready... but I worry that a part of me is starting to expect that showing up is a waste of time just like it always seems to be.




Missed your live feed this PM, but watched the video. Like I commented, I'd say keep and job you can and insist on taking yoour own precautions, such as masking. I know, the mask doesn't really protect all that much, buuut every little bit helps.

Maybe I'll catch the live Tuesday. Have to see.
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rovingjack
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« Reply #1772 on: May 27, 2020, 07:55:00 am »

I appreciate your checking out the videos whenever you check them.

is there something anyone would like to have me check out or talk about. That was originally part of the hope was to find something to share with each other each time. I have a couple a couple web pages I was checking out and thought would be fun to share.
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