xilan
Deck Hand
 United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« on: July 17, 2012, 07:39:22 am » |
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Hello, so I'm trying to write a dragon rider book similar to Eragon but in a steampunk era. so in this book, the fall of the riders happened 50 years ago at the start of the steampunk era when humans started becoming more intelligent and started fearing the power that the riders had, and the conflict is between two brothers. The dragon riders are ostracized by the humans who are living in a steampunk era. However the elves love, and respect the riders and have kept to the old ways. Well anyways there are 10 riders left from the noble times, and 6 are elves, 4 are human. All of the riders are sided with the elves tho, except for one. There is one rider that is an elf who is bassically a nomad. Well the main character "Xilan" who is human, comes across a wild dragon egg as it hatches, and he becomes attached to the dragon, the elf nomad feels the bond take place, and hunts him out to help train him in the ways of the dead noble riders. however all of Xilans family disowns him for becoming a rider and his younger brother vows to kill him. So the problem I'm having isn't with the story, but with the description, I cant figure out how to describe a steampunk city, or environment without saying steampunk. I was hoping someone on this forum would be able to help me out. Any tips, or suggestions would be appreciated.
Thanks,
Xilan
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~::~ The love between two brothers is more fragile than it appears ~::~
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Captain Braid
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« Reply #1 on: July 17, 2012, 08:53:31 am » |
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Clutter Dirty and Industrial.
Close cramper living space shared by more than one family. Industrial vehicles having right of way and overground railways.
Polluted Canals .
What's the main Fuel source, Coal then Dust everywhere , in atmosphere, surfaces food water etc.
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Experienced enough to know my limitations,
Old enough to know better,
Relaxed enough not to care.
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Lady Chrystal
Immortal
 Wales
Lady Adventurer, Chronicler
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« Reply #2 on: July 17, 2012, 09:31:32 am » |
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Get hold of some pictures of Victorian-era cities and add airships, etc.
The level of detail depends on how relevant the city is. If your characters only glimpse it in the distance, you don't need them to see much. If they actually live there, then you need to decide your own technology and describe that.
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"The Chrystal? Ah, now - that would be telling."
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xilan
Deck Hand
United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« Reply #3 on: July 17, 2012, 07:19:42 pm » |
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Get hold of some pictures of Victorian-era cities and add airships, etc.
The level of detail depends on how relevant the city is. If your characters only glimpse it in the distance, you don't need them to see much. If they actually live there, then you need to decide your own technology and describe that.
thats the thing i can't figure out how to describe the technology either. i dont know why i mean normally im extremely creative, im just have problems finding the right words. |
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Capt. Dirigible
Rogue Ætherlord
 United Kingdom
Shirts?.....I got plenty at 'ome.
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« Reply #4 on: July 17, 2012, 08:50:25 pm » |
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thats the thing i can't figure out how to describe the technology either. i dont know why i mean normally im extremely creative, im just have problems finding the right words. Not to mention apostrophes, commas and capital letters...  |
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I say, Joe it's jolly frightening out here.
Nonsense dear boy, you should be more like me.
But look at you! You're shaking all over!
Shaking? You silly goose! I'm just doing the Watusi
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xilan
Deck Hand
United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« Reply #5 on: July 17, 2012, 09:55:47 pm » |
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i dont find the need of proper grammar on internet forums. XD
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Lady Chrystal
Immortal
Wales
Lady Adventurer, Chronicler
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« Reply #6 on: July 17, 2012, 10:08:23 pm » |
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i dont find the need of proper grammar on internet forums. XD
It's an ingrained habit for many of us on here, just as you'll find this forumm far more inclined to courtesy than many others. Get hold of some pictures of Victorian-era cities and add airships, etc.
The level of detail depends on how relevant the city is. If your characters only glimpse it in the distance, you don't need them to see much. If they actually live there, then you need to decide your own technology and describe that.
thats the thing i can't figure out how to describe the technology either. i dont know why i mean normally im extremely creative, im just have problems finding the right words. Perhaps if you posted an example of your attempt at description, we would have some idea of how to assist. There's not much we can do to describe your technology unless we know what it is. |
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xilan
Deck Hand
United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« Reply #7 on: July 17, 2012, 10:18:21 pm » |
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anyways, i really just need some ideas on how to describe the different technologies and what not. I cant figure out how to put the right words together, as always any input, no matter how small is appreciated (unless it's refering to my grammar  ) |
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The Corsair
Defective Inspector
Moderator
Zeppelin Admiral
 New Zealand
Your Move
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« Reply #8 on: July 18, 2012, 05:21:15 am » |
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Well it depends on what the tech is. You're best off describing it really. Just imagine what it would look and sound like and describe that, be it whirring, beeping, hissing or bubbling.
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I think I should also mention I had a dream about this game, only Bailey was a woman...
I assure you, that incident in Singapore was all a misunderstanding. |
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TigerLily
Deck Hand
 Canada
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« Reply #9 on: July 18, 2012, 05:49:23 am » |
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i dont find the need of proper grammar on internet forums. XD
I can't wait to see your book. |
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Are you the Doctor?
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pakled
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« Reply #10 on: July 22, 2012, 05:52:24 am » |
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describe the technology as your find it. Steampunk is just a handle for a whole range of things, technology as biological, technical, magical, or any combination of the three. Tell the story first, then add descriptions for flavors (something I should do in my own stuff... Wow, from all the posts, I think dragons are the new 'zombies'... (or 'vampires'...maybe we're all starting a trend.) |
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Anastacia
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« Reply #11 on: July 22, 2012, 03:06:05 pm » |
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Perhaps you might want to invest in some light research? If it's just technological vocabulary you're needing help with, you could probably benefit from maybe sitting in on a couple classes about mechanical engineering, or consulting a professional tinkerer? Though I'm reminded of a comic strip from Kate Beaton ( http://www.harkavagrant.com/) |
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xilan
Deck Hand
United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« Reply #12 on: July 23, 2012, 03:20:03 am » |
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Perhaps you might want to invest in some light research? If it's just technological vocabulary you're needing help with, you could probably benefit from maybe sitting in on a couple classes about mechanical engineering, or consulting a professional tinkerer? Though I'm reminded of a comic strip from Kate Beaton ( http://www.harkavagrant.com/) I think thats what im going to do. ive struggled through the first 10 chapters its just lacking the meat and description to the story. |
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xilan
Deck Hand
United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« Reply #13 on: July 23, 2012, 03:24:09 am » |
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i dont find the need of proper grammar on internet forums. XD
I can't wait to see your book. to answer your signature. yes, i am the new doctor. im trapped in this era because my TARDIS has been stolen. I am fabulously in love with the victorian era |
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kot
Deck Hand
United Kingdom
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« Reply #14 on: July 23, 2012, 10:18:24 am » |
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This is a strange form of writer's block. Can you state exactly what you are asking for? There appear to be several people attempting to help you, but you don't see to know what you need from them.
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xilan
Deck Hand
United States
If you want contact info IM me
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« Reply #15 on: July 23, 2012, 06:30:18 pm » |
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This is a strange form of writer's block. Can you state exactly what you are asking for? There appear to be several people attempting to help you, but you don't see to know what you need from them.
you are exactly right. i didnt really express myself perfectly, however all the input i got has helped me, i was just having issues trying to find how to describe the setting in a fluid way that corresponded with the story. but ive figured it out with all the help from every one here  |
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