*wanders in well-dressed; however his overcoat fits oddly, and his complexion is its typical greyish*
I say...I was given to understand that those seeking nothing at all and other such great nonsecrets could apply here...this being a Notsecret Society I would obviously be, erm, non-degree seeking...and I appear to already have a Nonring of Nonmebership...*pulls out a Nonring on a leather thong around his neck*...which I unfortunately cannot wear on the proper finger due to my stiffness problem. Which problem, I feel compelled to mention, happened the last time I saw the Nonvanishing Nonpolice Box that was just out there on this unmarked street. Should you wish it, I will not offer my Noncelebrity Nonendorsement, being as how, despite my moniker, I am not a celebrity. Hence your Nonsecrets are perfectly safe even if I regularly attend your Nonmeetings which, I am given to understand, happen openly in broad daylight. Fear not, all, I am quite up to date on recent happenings, due to your habit of posting your Nonmeeting minutes and other Nonnews on the bulletin board out front. Very helpful, that.
*aside*
...No, Mike, I am NOT speaking Igpay Atinlay. Cut the snickering! And no, you can't hang my coat. Go back to the car.By the way, don't worry about Mike. The worst he does lately is cackle when I am forced to include the words "fear not" in every introduction. If he bothers you, threaten to tell me, I usually punish him by sending him to that domed city where everyone has crystals in their hands and no one is allowed to live past 30...he hates that. Something about starvation diets and Inter-Universal Conventions on the Rights of Time-Liberated Creatures...
I neglected to bring an introductory tipple, my apologies...I couldn't tell whether all this Nonstuff meant people would prefer non-alcoholic. *Looks around* Somehow I doubt it. I'll gladly remedy that error on my next Nonvisit.
However, if there is tea or coffee present, I'll have some next time a fresh pot is ready...however...I hesitate to pry into this delicate matter...surely there is something besides...*horrified whisper*...
decaf?! 