Monkey Butlers: Steampunk or not?

[Herr Döktor]

Nonononono. Monkey butlers wear little red waistcoats and a red fez!

Yes, it's a tradition, or an old charter, or something.

[OswaldBastable]

As long as you dont hire the double agent monkey in Raiders of the Lost Ark

[Atterton]

I suppose you are aware that trained helper monkeys are sometimes used to help the handicapped.

[OswaldBastable]

I suppose you are aware that trained helper monkeys are sometimes used to help the handicapped.

yep I've seen an episode of Malcolm in the Middle

[Atterton]

Yes, that was one damned dirty helper monkey.

[OswaldBastable]

Yes, that was one damned dirty helper monkey.

 

[Arvis]

I suppose you are aware that trained helper monkeys are sometimes used to help the handicapped.

 YES indeed!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpG4R3Sjf4Y

[Mr Peter Harrow, Esq]

Butlers often wear a uniform reminiscent of black or even white tie, a 'monkey suit' in the vernacular. From this I presume satiricists created the images of monkeys in such uniforms holding trays and the harliquinned monstrosity the requires repainting.

[Capt. Dirigible]

Butlers often wear a uniform reminiscent of black or even white tie, a 'monkey suit' in the vernacular. From this I presume satiricists created the images of monkeys in such uniforms holding trays and the harliquinned monstrosity the requires repainting.

Quite so Mr Harrow. I have always pictured my MB as wearing a tail coat with white shirt cuffs showing (no sleeves..just the cuffs)..a shirt front/waistcoat combo (no back to it..just the front) with attached black bow tie, trousers and grey spats over bare his feet.

Similar to this

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Fezs and red waistcoats are suitable attire for MBs in hot climes, I think..somewhere in the colonies, perhaps. But at home my MB would have the Jeeves- like' classic butler appearance.

Maybe it's because I always imagine my MB as being a chimp..(technically an 'ape') and I feel a fez and waistcoat suit the smaller  monkey better. An actual monkey with a tail.
However these are usually smaller and not as strong as a chimp. How can one of those monkeys bring me a tray of tea..one cup at a time? I don't think so.

Strangely..if you do a Google image search for 'monkey in a tux' the majority of pics feature a chimp in a tux or a tailcoat. However if you search for 'monkey in a fez' the they are almost exclusively smaller tailed monkeys..

[Miss Romwell]

I'd never given it much thought till now, but monkey butlers do seem to come in a couple of distinct types. There's your actual tailed monkey in frogged waistcoat and fez (the 'barrel organ' look), though as has been pointed out, probably not much real use when serving tea, let alone mixing a cocktail, and your chimp in white tie and tails (the 'Jeeves' look).
I'm not sure which us preferable, the latter is the more practicle, but a monkey in a fez is just so cute...

Would roller-skates be over doing it?

[Herr Döktor]

Only if they are powered.

[Argus Fairbrass]

Sir, - I feel that I must apologise most sincerely.
My initial condemnation of this thread was, upon reflection, a trifle hasty.

I must admit that (despite it being a slightly vulgar indulgence) I do find myself musing on the concept of a group of highly trained, appropriately armed and (of course) suitably attired Gorilla bodyguards.

I feel sure in fact, that when confronted by the cowardly system of Thugee, so scandalously prevalent in our society today. The afore mentioned Great Apes, would prove far more effective a deterrent than any form of life preserver currently available.

And I would further add that the thought of seeing off such frightful and unsavoury ruffians with a triumphant cry of  “Yo dawgz, don’t be messin wit ma Rillaz! ”, is uncommonly satisfying…. Innit! 

[Wilhelmina Frame]

I must say that I prefer my tea gnomes that live happy under my stairwell.

[Mr. Boltneck]

It may or may not be of significance to this thread, but today at the Folsom Street Fair, on the 7th Street stage, one of the dancers was wearing a monkey mask and a red fez (and little else, really). Not a butler, at least not at the time, but another data point connecting monkeys and red fezzes.

[Capt. Dirigible]

While discussing MBs with The Countess over the weekend I asked her how she imagined  one..a chimp or a smaller, tailed monkey. Her reply was 'neither'. Her ideal MB would be an Orangutan..but in a tailcoat or tux. Her theory being that they are , by far, the most intelligent of the apes and  therefore would train up better and their strength is greater than that of a chimp. Plus they don't look out of place in clothes as you would think..

[Aeryenne Tederich]

It's a mark of how easily I am amused that I absolutely fell about laughing at that photo.

[Capt. Dirigible]

It's a mark of how easily I am amused that I absolutely fell about laughing at that photo.

Then I suggest you go for the fez and waistcoat look for your MB otherwise you'll be convulsed with laughter everytime he makes an appearance..

[bicyclebuilder]

how about raccoons to do the dishes. With goggles for soapy eyes. Ofcourse trained with affection.

[Capt. Dirigible]

how about raccoons to do the dishes. With goggles for soapy eyes. Ofcourse trained with affection.

Whoah..whoah ...this is getting silly now! I started off with a perfectly  sensible thread about the possibilities of trained simian servants and  we've had responses in favour of incorporating hamsters, giraffes, elephants and now raccoons into domestic servitude. We have to nip this kind of thinking in the bud otherwise in no time at all we'll find ourselves in a situation like

this

And even though choreographed, musical animals, when they set their mind to it, can apparently  spring clean with the best of them..there isn't a single monkey in that clip. So remember..it's MONKEY BUTLERS as opposed to 'random woodland/jungle creatures being a bit helpful around the house'!

[Lazaras]

Quite

Though one does have to remember to be quite kind to the simmians, otherwise when the inevetable monkey uprising occures their first order of business will be to rip you limb from limb rather than politely ask that you stay inside until all the shouting outside is over.

[Mr. Boltneck]

Besides which, raccoons are only cute at a distance as far as I'm concerned. Having been camping in raccoon country, like the Santa Cruz Mountains, I can guarantee that they are thieving, bitey, and malodorous. Also, just clever enough to be real bastards with it.

[Miss Romwell]

Oh, no, choreographed woodland creatures is a step too far. Might work well in animation, but you just know the reality would be droppings everywhere, and for all I know that baby deer is licking Lyme Disease spirochetes all over the flatware... Awful.
The issue I can see with monkey butlers is that they get together and unionise, demanding better pay (more bananas), and conditions (a nice tyre on a rope on the servsnt's quarters). This will lead to an inevitable schism, when the cocktail mixing, roller skating chimps and orangs in dinner jackets decide that the befezzed macaques, who can't even serve tea properly, are unskilled labour, and therefore deserving of a lower payscale than themselves.

[19th Century Space Pilot]

I must say, I prefer Orangutans to Chimpanzees - they're less violent than common Chimps, and unlike Bonobos don't engage in mating attempts the majority of the time with anything that moves.

[The_Major]

I'm sure this hirsuite fellow should be a retired Major with this fine moustache, taking tea at the club and relating stories about various wars.

[Mr Peter Harrow, Esq]

Oh, no, choreographed woodland creatures is a step too far. Might work well in animation, but you just know the reality would be droppings everywhere, and for all I know that baby deer is licking Lyme Disease spirochetes all over the flatware... Awful.
The issue I can see with monkey butlers is that they get together and unionise, demanding better pay (more bananas), and conditions (a nice tyre on a rope on the servsnt's quarters). This will lead to an inevitable schism, when the cocktail mixing, roller skating chimps and orangs in dinner jackets decide that the befezzed macaques, who can't even serve tea properly, are unskilled labour, and therefore deserving of a lower payscale than themselves.

Naw, they will work for peanuts.