Things that make you go WTF?

[Athanor]

There was an ad that ran before the feature movie in cinemas in Britain many, many years ago. It showed a group of beautiful young people - two handsome guys and two gorgeous, bikini-clad girls - sailing the Pacific aboard what looked like at least a 60ft schooner. Blue ocean, cloudless sky, a gentle breeze, an idyllic adventure. No mention of any commercial product until right at the end, when, incongruously, out of the water popped - a bottle of aftershave lotion. Everyone in the theatre just fell about laughing.

The obvious way to look at it was, of course, the exploitation of sex, romance and adventure in order to sell a product. But after thinking about it for a while I decided that what was really happening was entirely subversive - the exploitation of a commercial product in order to "sell" sex, romance and adventure. After all, the juxtaposition of aftershave lotion(!) with a carefree sailing adventure aboard a magnificent schooner with beatiful companions was just too ludicrous for anyone to take it seriously.

[MWBailey]

Will Smith being in that !@# ^$!# water tower in that Wild Wild West movie. Why in heaven's name is the woman's boudoir in the reservoir at the top of a railroad water tower? Was there some cult that I'm not aware of that revered water towers for such activities? What if there had been an electrical storm? Wouldn't she be all waterlogged? Why am I dwelling on this?

[Aleister Crow]

Old Spice "Matterhorn" deodorant: "Smells like Ice, Wind and Freedom!"

Evidently Ice, wind and freedom smell like soap.

[ForestB]

Old Spice "Matterhorn" deodorant: "Smells like Ice, Wind and Freedom!"

Evidently Ice, wind and freedom smell like soap.

That reminds me of the "ocean fresh" scent of some laundry detergents- I'm sure that no one would want their clothes to REALLY smell like salt, seaweed and fish...

[bicyclebuilder]

Old Spice "Matterhorn" deodorant: "Smells like Ice, Wind and Freedom!"

Evidently Ice, wind and freedom smell like soap.

After a while, the ice in my fridge start to smel a bit funky.
The only wind that has a scent is the one someone would break.
Also smells like fresh cut cheese 
Freedom doesn't have a smell, neather does captivity.
So to conclude: Old Spice smells like stinky fridges and farts?

[Stella Aberwitz]

Allergy warning on milk packages: "Contains milk".
Orly.

[Clym Angus]

Old Spice "Matterhorn" deodorant: "Smells like Ice, Wind and Freedom!"

Evidently Ice, wind and freedom smell like soap.

So smell like dying of hypothermia, lost in the Antarctic tundra then?
Well put me down for 3 bottles of that cold mummification goodness!

[Aleister Crow]

Allergy warning on milk packages: "Contains milk".
Orly.

In this day and age, they have to do that so some idiot won't try to sue them.

[Herr Döktor]

Allergy warning on milk packages: "Contains milk".
Orly.

In this day and age, they have to do that so some idiot won't try to sue them.

I'm waiting, with baited breath, for the day that every exterior door has  a sign on the inside saying:

WARNING!
REALITY MAY HAVE
A DEBILITATING EFFECT
UPON YOUR PERSON, WITH
A REAL POSSIBILITY OF
CAUSING DANGER TO YOUR
HEALTH, OR EVEN
DEATH

[ForestB]

Allergy warning on milk packages: "Contains milk".
Orly.

I saw a similar warning on cheese....

[darkshines]

I bought a lettace once that claimed it was suitable for vegetarians and May Contain Nuts.

[Captain Shipton Bellinger]

Allergy warning on milk packages: "Contains milk".
Orly.

In this day and age, they have to do that so some idiot won't try to sue them.

I'm waiting, with baited breath, for the day that every exterior door has  a sign on the inside saying:

WARNING!
REALITY MAY HAVE
A DEBILITATING EFFECT
UPON YOUR PERSON, WITH
A REAL POSSIBILITY OF
CAUSING DANGER TO YOUR
HEALTH, OR EVEN
DEATH

Reality?

Pah! I'll have no truck with it.

[Lady Arachne]

On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. I always remember this one..

[schreberette]

This:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1279956/Montauk-Monster-Beast-Ontario.html

[Sir Nikolas Vendigroth]

And this!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1337542/The-dead-night-forest-ghoul-caught-camera.html

[Lady Ava]

That advert that says:

'Because Winter hates your face!'

I was unaware that my face had done anything to upset Winter, or that Winter was capable of hate. 

[Antigone]

Allergy warning on milk packages: "Contains milk".
Orly.

Just like the Warning on my lighter:

Caution! Flame may be hot!

WHAT?! OMG!

[Ms. Elisabeth Collins]

My apparent subconscious desire to kill myself via painful food.

I just finished eating what I've decided to name "Masochism Maki."

It consists of rice mixed with soy sauce and a bit of apple cider vinegar, then placed on a lettuce leaf and liberally coated with Sriracha sauce.   

My lips and mouth hurt so much they're almost numb.  Going drink more milk now.

It did taste good.

[Capt. Dirigible]

Will Smith being in that !@# ^$!# water tower in that Wild Wild West movie. Why in heaven's name is the woman's boudoir in the reservoir at the top of a railroad water tower? Was there some cult that I'm not aware of that revered water towers for such activities? What if there had been an electrical storm? Wouldn't she be all waterlogged? Why am I dwelling on this?

Well..on the subject of WWW how on earth did a black man become the highest  ranking, most respected agent in the Secret Service..answerable only to The President...less than a decade after the Emancipation Proclamation!!??? It's ludicrous! It's a particular bug-bear of mind that film makers and TV show directors are determined to crowbar black and ethnic characters into period settings where they simply would not have been. For example..It's become obligatory for any new version of Robin Hood to now have a black guy in his  Merry Men. I know everyone is 'PC' today and if you make a film without any black or ethnic characters in it someone will complain or call it racist. However, I think this has finally reached it's nadir! The forthcoming film 'Thor' based on the Marvel comics super-hero is set (mostly) in Asgaard, the home of the Norse Gods..and the part of Heimdale, gaurdian of the Rainbow Bridge, is played by Idris Elba!!!! C'mon!! A black Norse god!!? WTF???

[bicyclebuilder]

Will Smith being in that !@# ^$!# water tower in that Wild Wild West movie. Why in heaven's name is the woman's boudoir in the reservoir at the top of a railroad water tower? Was there some cult that I'm not aware of that revered water towers for such activities? What if there had been an electrical storm? Wouldn't she be all waterlogged? Why am I dwelling on this?

Well..on the subject of WWW how on earth did a black man become the highest  ranking, most respected agent in the Secret Service..answerable only to The President...less than a decade after the Emancipation Proclamation!!??? It's ludicrous! It's a particular bug-bear of mind that film makers and TV show directors are determined to crowbar black and ethnic characters into period settings where they simply would not have been. For example..It's become obligatory for any new version of Robin Hood to now have a black guy in his  Merry Men. I know everyone is 'PC' today and if you make a film without any black or ethnic characters in it someone will complain or call it racist. However, I think this has finally reached it's nadir! The forthcoming film 'Thor' based on the Marvel comics super-hero is set (mostly) in Asgaard, the home of the Norse Gods..and the part of Heimdale, gaurdian of the Rainbow Bridge, is played by Idris Elba!!!! C'mon!! A black Norse god!!? WTF???

Yeah, what's next? Snow white played by Whoopy Goldberg? 
On the other hand, WWW is a fictional story. Half a guy in a steam-wheelchair is acceptable? Giant steampowered spider is realistic? 
But you do have a point.
For PC sake every movie has to have a black, white, short, tall, skinny, fat, disabled person in it. And forbid the funny jokes about any minoraty. No swearing or sex in movies, but you can show guns and violence? Kind of a double standard.

[Captain Shipton Bellinger]

The forthcoming film 'Thor' based on the Marvel comics super-hero is set (mostly) in Asgaard, the home of the Norse Gods..and the part of Heimdale, gaurdian of the Rainbow Bridge, is played by Idris Elba!!!! C'mon!! A black Norse god!!? WTF???

Well, Hel was half black. 

[helios]

The forthcoming film 'Thor' based on the Marvel comics super-hero is set (mostly) in Asgaard, the home of the Norse Gods..and the part of Heimdale, gaurdian of the Rainbow Bridge, is played by Idris Elba!!!! C'mon!! A black Norse god!!? WTF???

Well, Hel was half black. 

... Well played.

[Capt. Dirigible]

The forthcoming film 'Thor' based on the Marvel comics super-hero is set (mostly) in Asgaard, the home of the Norse Gods..and the part of Heimdale, gaurdian of the Rainbow Bridge, is played by Idris Elba!!!! C'mon!! A black Norse god!!? WTF???

Well, Hel was half black. 

Oh very good (nobody likes a smart arse ) But that's literally half black half flesh coloured..as in divided down the middle..not 'of mixed race'
 Heimdal is described in Wikipedia as:
".. a god who possesses the resounding horn Gjallarhorn, owns the golden-maned horse Gulltoppr, is "the whitest of the gods", has gold teeth, and is the son of Nine Mothers".

It just irritates me whan ethnic and black characters are crowbarred into period stories where they simply would not have been at that time just to appease the PC crowd.

[Just call me Rob]

As a concept it can be quite interesting.
There was an adaptation of the 'Moor of Venice' where Patrick Stewart played the Moor and all the rest of the cast was black.

Thor being black is a very interesting twist – I wonder if they'll come up with some explanation for it or some sort of social commentary?
Shadow in American Gods was black, and he was supposed to be descended from all sorts of old gods and stuff – something to do with a mixing of all earthly cultures.
Perhaps the Thor in question won't be the original Thor, but some long distant descendant of Thor?

It makes little sense for a Norse god to be anything but traditionally nodic, but, most western cultures see Jesus as white which is quite unlikely if you look at where he was born – so maybe it's some sort of commentary on that?

Then again, I'm not sure if I need my escapist fantasy stuff to need social commentary and underlying moralistic tones – I just want to see car chases and stuff getting blown up.

[Xenos]

I have a hat that was given me by a tobacco company.  It's your standard trucker hat, you know the type.

On the side of the hat:  WARNING:  May cause MOUTH CANCER.

I am yet to wear that hat.

Also, on the chainsaw my da recently bought:  "WARNING:  Do NOT attempt to stop blade with genitalia."

I'll post pics of the hat if I can ever be arsed to find it...