Things that make you go WTF?

[Ulysses Reynolds]

My mines more mundane, but I'm now know through the entire town of mt sinai. For two things 1. My voracious appetite and 2. my hat and leather jacket. It's gotten to the point where somebody upon seeing me either starts humming the Indiana Jones theme song or asks me if I'm gonna eat them out of house and home. Hmm, guess first impressions do count.

[Aleister Crow]

Laser guided Lightning Death Rays.

Now a reality.

Quote from one of the mad geniuses that developed it:

George Fischer, lead scientist on the project, said: "We never got tired of the lightning bolts zapping our simulated [targets]."

I'd never get tired of that, either. 

[EScoggin]

.........  Anyone else ever do, act, or dress a certain way that has made them local celebrities without them ever realizing it until later?  

I guess so. For the past 3 years I've been the star in our school plays and now I find myself attacked by little 1-3 graders, they all want a hug or high five, and the older kids who knew me before I 'got famous' almost knock the wind out of me with hugs. However the boys in my grade and one up don't seem to notice So that's my WTF
I would say my basketball shorts and cowboy boots have made me popular was well, but they just got me accepted into the Pomeroy High School Hick Society.

[Siliconous Skumins]

Laser guided Lightning Death Rays.

Now a reality.

Quote from one of the mad geniuses that developed it:

George Fischer, lead scientist on the project, said: "We never got tired of the lightning bolts zapping our simulated [targets]."

I'd never get tired of that, either. 

Yeah it's been a long time coming - I've known about it for at least 15 years! It started out as device about the size of a luggage trunk, with the aim of making a non lethal "stun" weapon not unlike a StarTrek phazor rifle...  It had a working distance of around 3Km.

It's really simple to make, an annular confined beam of plasma is created by two UV C LASERs stripping the electrons from the air forming a conductive channel, then a high voltage is applied to create the plasma. Allegedly it was "safe even if the target was shot in the eyeballs"... Don't think I'd be willing to test that theory, personally! 

I did a little research and even came up with a few designs that would work (in theory) - but the UV LASER source was always a problem. One day I *will* build my death ray !!!   

SS

[Aleister Crow]

http://www.ebay.ca/itm/Grimoire-Necronomicon-Donald-Tyson-Cthulhu-Lovecraft-Ritual-Black-Magic-/150892439501?pt=US_Nonfiction_Book&hash=item2321e3e7cd

A practical system of ritual magic based on the mythology of the Old Ones, who are featured in the fiction of H. P. Lovecraft

I know the author isn't the first person to come up with a real world magic system of Lovecraft's stuff, but I've never seen it this New Age-y. Really, an uncaring eldritch abomination from beyond time and space, that'll destroy the world when the stars are right... as your spiritual guide. I'd ask who in their right mind would even consider this a good idea, but insanity is such a big theme with Lovecraft that the answer is obvious...

Tyson expands upon the Old Ones' mythology and reintroduces these "monsters" in a new, magical context-explaining their true purpose for our planet. As a disciple, you choose one of the seven lords as a spiritual mentor, who will guide you toward personal transformation.

Yeah. A "personal transformation" into a fishmonster.

Grimoire of the Necronomicon features ritual forms and invocations for the daily and yearly rites of the Old Ones, individual rituals devoted to each of the seven major figures of the mythos, and most importantly, a grand ritual for personal attainment. The daily rituals provide an excellent system of esoteric training for individual practitioners. This grimoire also provides structure for an esoteric society-Order of the Old Ones-devoted to the group practice of this unique system of magic.

They had an Order like that at Innsmouth. They were very devoted- to turning into fishmonsters.

[chironex]

A series of bangs occurred earlier, which I think were gunshots. At least I think I thought WTF then...
I have noone to say it to.

[Angus A Fitziron]

Since coming back from holiday, we find the cat has diabetes and needs twice daily insulin injections, my plan to get the central heating boiler replaced whilst it is still summer gets screwed at every turn and now I get a call saying my daughter has had a car accident. Nobody hurt thank goodness but the car (her first one, a small auto, which took ages to find) is looking "beyond economic repair" due to the airbags operating and needing replacement. Having a WTF moment as all these things are going to be expensive...

[J. Wilhelm]

Since coming back from holiday, we find the cat has diabetes and needs twice daily insulin injections, my plan to get the central heating boiler replaced whilst it is still summer gets screwed at every turn and now I get a call saying my daughter has had a car accident. Nobody hurt thank goodness but the car (her first one, a small auto, which took ages to find) is looking "beyond economic repair" due to the airbags operating and needing replacement. Having a WTF moment as all these things are going to be expensive...

Meow -er- I mean wow.  Seems pets acquire the same health problems as humans do.  Maybe the cat is overeating and hypo-active. You should have the cat checked for depressive disorder, alcohol or gambling problems just to make sure (if female the tendency is eating disorders).

I can relate to the car issues.  I'm on foot now after having lost my car to a broken head gasket.  Repairs are so expensive I opted to have the "car wreckers" come pick up the 22 year old car, lest I get towed by the police hence costing me even more money.  Only God knows when I'll have a car again.  While Texas is not the coldest of places in Winter, I do fear the few weeks of freezing cold we will have.  I have never been forced to walk long distances in the cold before.

[Angus A Fitziron]

The cat is called 'Bandit' he is the runt of the litter and his fatter brother (who does have an eating disorder, ie he eats everything he sees) is called Smokey. Get the picture? Bandit is probably a gambler and general spiv and your suggestion explains where my rum is going to! We think the probable cause is genetic though apparently cats have a tendancy to insulin rejection which may - just - reverse itself, but I think it is unlikely.

As the car was my daughter's first, we helped her get a better car than she could afford so it was reliable ~ 8 years old, 45,000 miles, so dad would be spared all the callouts. The low mileage, condition and rarity (automatic) raised the price, so the insured value, if they write it off, will be far less than its replacement value. Such is the insurance business. The fact that both front airbags went off means their re-instatement will take the otherwise minimal cost of repair over the insured value. So, not only will we have to stump up the difference, I have another long and detailed search for a replacement...

Worthy of a Gaaaaah!

[aquachromis]

I friend posted a link to this article on facebook, and my response was definitely WTF. I'd love to know what the Yahoo writer looks like that they feel free pass this sort of judgement.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/reelsnarky/yahoo-thinks-christina-hendricks-curves-are-an-i-5xqt

[Kryss LaBryn]

Finally got around to watching the (very entertaining, by the way) 2011 film "Hysteria," about the development of the electric vibrator in 1880. Unsurprisingly, the film opens with the words, "This story is based on true events. Really."

The WTF part comes right at the very end, though, after the credits, where it says "The characters and events portrayed in this film are entirely fictitious, and similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Wait, what?

[Kryss LaBryn]

As the car was my daughter's first, we helped her get a better car than she could afford so it was reliable ~ 8 years old, 45,000 miles, so dad would be spared all the callouts. The low mileage, condition and rarity (automatic) raised the price, so the insured value, if they write it off, will be far less than its replacement value. Such is the insurance business. The fact that both front airbags went off means their re-instatement will take the otherwise minimal cost of repair over the insured value. So, not only will we have to stump up the difference, I have another long and detailed search for a replacement...

I went through something similar years ago in BC. Your insurance company may do things a bit differently, but it's worth noting that your vehicle is probably insured for its replacement value. With mine, I had a vehicle that, on average in that area, was going for about $400 (this being over twenty years ago now), but my one was worth $1,200, my Dad being a mechanic and having taken the time to find one in perfect mechanical condition, rather than the beaters that the average '77 Honda Civics were.

I only ever did get $400 for it from ICBC, as they would give you the "average" replacement cost (which they estimated by going through the local Buy & Sell and seeing what a '77 Honda Civic was going for, on average, with no factoring of condition). If your vehicle is in better condition and worth more than the average replacement cost, you should know that they are obligated to replace that vehicle, and provide another similar vehicle in similar condition. You may need to have an independent mechanic (or your usual one who is familiar with its pre-accident condition, if you have one) provide you with an official estimate of its value, but don't let them slough you off with, "Yeah, here's what these things go for." They actually do have to get you a similar vehicle in a similar condition (or rather, funds equivalent to), so don't let them rip you off.

It may be a bit of a struggle to get them to deal fairly with you (gods know ICBC won't if they can help it  ), but they should get you the actual replacement value, if you insist upon it. The key is knowing that if you do insist, they do have to do it.

[LukeHogbin]

*snip*
The WTF part comes right at the very end, though, after the credits, where it says "The characters and events portrayed in this film are entirely fictitious, and similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Wait, what?

Just a legal safety net for the producers. I think we all know that some people are trigger-happy when it comes to lawsuits.

[rovingjack]

*snip*
The WTF part comes right at the very end, though, after the credits, where it says "The characters and events portrayed in this film are entirely fictitious, and similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Wait, what?

Just a legal safety net for the producers. I think we all know that some people are trigger-happy when it comes to lawsuits.

Actually I'd say it's more to do with the idea that somebody gave somebody else a headline "Vibrator first invented in the 1800s as a treatment for hysteria!" and so it's based on truth, but everything from that point on was created for the script. Based on a truth and being a truth are not the same thing.

[Aleister Crow]

PffffffhahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHA!

Emergency Sacrifice Kit

[Angus A Fitziron]

It may be a bit of a struggle to get them to deal fairly with you (gods know ICBC won't if they can help it   ), but they should get you the actual replacement value, if you insist upon it. The key is knowing that if you do insist, they do have to do it.

Thank you Lady Amelia, I think I had a stroke of luck - the engineer they sent round to do the estimate seemed a pretty straight guy. We discussed the possibility of me getting it rebuilt but he did warn me of the all the invisible bits ~ seat belt tensioners (and possibly seat belts), various triggers and sensors and of course the Thatcham retest certificate, without which I could not re-insure the vehicle. So, I was quite delighted to find out that he had valued the vehicle at a reasonable price and I was happy to accept when the insurance company rang with it!

Now I just have to find another one - they are like hen's teeth - still daughter's pain at having to wait may help her concentrate more...

Would I enjoy 'Hysteria' or is it a lady's movie???

[Kryss LaBryn]

It may be a bit of a struggle to get them to deal fairly with you (gods know ICBC won't if they can help it   ), but they should get you the actual replacement value, if you insist upon it. The key is knowing that if you do insist, they do have to do it.

Thank you Lady Amelia, I think I had a stroke of luck - the engineer they sent round to do the estimate seemed a pretty straight guy. We discussed the possibility of me getting it rebuilt but he did warn me of the all the invisible bits ~ seat belt tensioners (and possibly seat belts), various triggers and sensors and of course the Thatcham retest certificate, without which I could not re-insure the vehicle. So, I was quite delighted to find out that he had valued the vehicle at a reasonable price and I was happy to accept when the insurance company rang with it!

Excellent!

Would I enjoy 'Hysteria' or is it a lady's movie???

I think you'd probably quite enjoy it. It was very fun, and while it was listed as a romantic comedy, the romance aspect of it wasn't as cloying as I usually find.

I would say though that, while nothing improper is seen, there is a lot of innuendo, pretty frank discussions (albeit usually brief) about female sexuality, and there are quite a lot of scenes of ladies being treated for hysteria. All with proper little curtained screens, of course, but you might want to send young children out of the room for some of the bits, especially the ones with the matrons gripping the screen while shouting "Come on, then, doctor! Tally ho!" in an encouraging manner.  

[citizen_erased]

I just woke up because I heard something move through my room, a mouse or something, and I could swear I could hear it chew on something even, but now I can`t find any trace of anything whatsoever.

[Hez]

I just woke up because I heard something move through my room, a mouse or something, and I could swear I could hear it chew on something even, but now I can`t find any trace of anything whatsoever.

It was probably in the wall space not in the actual room.
I don't know if that makes it better or worse for you.

[citizen_erased]

I just woke up because I heard something move through my room, a mouse or something, and I could swear I could hear it chew on something even, but now I can`t find any trace of anything whatsoever.

It was probably in the wall space not in the actual room.
I don't know if that makes it better or worse for you.

No definitely in my actual room.

[ramonwmq]

I know all the reasons why they put Braille on the signs, It's the imagery of blind drivers that I was thinking of. What's next? Braille bumps on the road?

Nope, I think braille on bumper stickers 

[Hez]

I know all the reasons why they put Braille on the signs, It's the imagery of blind drivers that I was thinking of. What's next? Braille bumps on the road?

Nope, I think braille on bumper stickers 

A local theater (stage not movie) had new and I presume temporary, Braille signs on the washrooms.  They were photocopies.

[Baron Von Sanguis]

My wtf comes from a couple days ago. I was preparing a sandwich for a customer. He wanted hots on his sandwich. I hear from the counter "That's enough hots..." The wtf part comes in realizing he really couldn't see me. Unless of course he can see through metal. At which point his x-ray vision is probably the actual wtf here. Hmmm...

[D.Oakes]

My wtf comes from a couple days ago. I was preparing a sandwich for a customer. He wanted hots on his sandwich. I hear from the counter "That's enough hots..." The wtf part comes in realizing he really couldn't see me. Unless of course he can see through metal. At which point his x-ray vision is probably the actual wtf here. Hmmm...

Oh those customers are what happens when somebody who believes themselves to be management material never get a command job.  They will give you orders just to feel important.  I get those in the tourist industry every day.  Had one today, "HEY!  I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT YOUR LIGHTS ARE MALFUNCTIONING!"  "Huh, that's probably because we have somebody working on them right now."  "Huh?  Oh, but still I had a hard time reading!"  "Yeah, we're in the process of fixing that as we speak.  So you'll be able to see just fine."  "Well....uhmm....I won't....but...(at this point he tries to find a reason to complain) the next customers will, but I didn't get a chance!" 

Oh and let's not ignore the GPS idiot....
The other day he comes in, pays for admission for him and his wife and immediately starts to scream at the security guard and myself because our directions were bad.  Now, we get mixed reviews on our directions.  "YOU DON'T HAVE SIGNS!"  "Hey we only found out about this place from your signs, great work."  I actually have given up trying with the customers on those points and usually chalk it up to them not paying attention.  Well our address is technically not in reality, it is only our mailing address.  If customers have problems getting there, we have our number so they can call and we help them.  Well this bozo was one of the few with a GPS that actually accepts our address.  Awesome.  The problem is, he does not understand the point of a GPS.  Instead of putting in our address he decided to map every single turn we had for customers without GPS.  Needless to say for mundane things like, "turn left at the light" the GPS does not work.  He was mad because we did not have addresses for these things.  Finally after being screamed at for 10 minutes both the security guard and I threw our customer service skills out the window.  I looked at him and said, "SIR!  Do you understand that if we printed brochures with all the information for every customer from every state and country with every possible GPS system with every possible style of navigating, it would be so big and so expensive we wouldn't be having this conversation because I wouldn't have a job!"  At that I actually walked away from my post to cool down.  (and yes, that's what all he wanted on brochures) 

I hate people sometimes.  Then we get Australians....for whatever reason people from Australia who visit the museum are always polite, friendly, and ask the best questions.  I am always very happy when I ask the marketing questions and get "Australia." 

[LukeHogbin]

A video of a dancing chicken that I posted has more views than my latest Minecraft video... xD