>The Smoking Room< The Lady's have a tearoom, so here's a Gentleman's Club

[Athena]

Ah, you don't wanna hear my problems, he slurred.

Ye Gods man...one pint glass and you're already slurring? *giggle* I think I'll have some as well. *pours myself a glass*

So you're still in school then?

[Steamhappi]

I'll take another two fingers of bourbon with a bit of ice, if you would please m'Lady. And the same for Mr. Harrison here, if he feels so inclined.

* Takes out his cigar case, cuts and lights a maduro corona*

[Athena]

Depends, can I bum a smoke? Pay's not what it was y'know. *grin*

*pours two glasses of bourbon, with ice* Here you are. *takes a rag and wipes down the bar*

[Gentleman-Adventurer]

Ah, you don't wanna hear my problems, he slurred.

Ye Gods man...one pint glass and you're already slurring? *giggle* I think I'll have some as well. *pours myself a glass*

So you're still in school then?

College, ma'am. Final year Archaeology and Classics.

[Steamhappi]

Depends, can I bum a smoke? Pay's not what it was y'know. *grin*

*pours two glasses of bourbon, with ice* Here you are. *takes a rag and wipes down the bar*

But of course m'Lady it would be my pleaseure, help yourself.
*Opens his leather-bound cigar case and offers her a choice of fine cigars and places his cutter on the bar iin front of her*

[James Harrison]

I'll take another two fingers of bourbon with a bit of ice, if you would please m'Lady. And the same for Mr. Harrison here, if he feels so inclined.

* Takes out his cigar case, cuts and lights a maduro corona*

*Mr Harrison wakes with a start*

Did I hear someone offer me Bourbon?  Why, that is jolly kind of you, thank you! 

[Steamhappi]

Think nothing of it my good man. 

[kurohone]

*wanders into the club curiously, peering about at the unfamiliar and semi-familiar faces*

*hears a very familiar word*

Bourbon?  Might I join you fellows (and lady!) and partake of a glass myself?

[Steamhappi]

By all means, join us sir!

[Athena]

Ah, thank you. *takes a smoke and cuts off the end* Hmmmm....*looking around* Anybody got a light?

Another bourbon sir? *pours another glass* *hands to kurohone* Thankee for the "lady" compliment, some would say otherwise.

@Gentleman: Really? Sounds fascinating. And none of this ma'am business, please. I don't need to feel any older thank you. 

[James Harrison]

*Takes out a pack of matches and strikes one on a matchlight*

There you go Athena. 

[Athena]

Mmmmm....*lighting cigar and inhaling deep* Thank you ever so much.

What's the topic of conversation now? *Taking a drink* Women? Tinkering? Adventure?

[kurohone]

*takes a sip*

The Adventure of Tinkering with Women?

[Athena]

*laughing* Now that's an interesting topic.

Y'see, when tinkering with women you have to be extremely careful. We can go off or purr at the slightest touch in the right spot. You never want to tighten the wrong spring, if you get my drift. It's best to start at the eyes and then work your way down, not the opposite.

*pulls out a diagram and a pointy stick*

Well, I take that back, it depends on the model of the woman you're tinkering with. Newer models may react differently than some of the older ones. You begin probing here.....*pointing at an area*

[kurohone]

*eyebrows shooting up into hairline*

My word!  What an interesting...and detailed...diagram!  I must commend your hand!  And the rest of it is excellent as well.

Now, do you mind if I take notes...

*rummages in pockets for paper and pen*

[Athena]

Thank you, I tried to be as accurate as possible. Mind you, I'm not great at electrical diagrams, but I think I've gotten this one pretty well.

*ahem* Now, where was I.....ah. *taking a drink and a long drag from the cigar*

These are...well...this isn't an anatomy lesson mind you. Do you see this area? Here? Around the ear? Now, if you gently...gently....well, once again, depends on the model, brush against it there should be an area, around the back, that allows you to....you are taking notes, aren't you?

[James Harrison]

Oh yes  

*buries his head back into the ream of notepaper and continues to scribble furiously*

[Athena]

Alright.

You should be able to open a panel that allows you direct access into the brain. It's a bit like a puzzle box...brute force sometimes won't work, you have to push in the right spot. Now, the panel should open around the nape of the neck or a little lower, once there you can take one of these....*looking for an instrument*...where did those go?

Has anyone seen a kind of...well, they look a little like needlenose pliers but are kind of bent at the end, at a 90 degree angle.

[James Harrison]

*checks under his seat*

I'm afraid I don't have it.  Is that it hiding behind the table lamp on our (the audience that is) side of the desk?

[Athena]

Ah! Yes! Thank you! *grabs the instrument*

Unfortunately I don't have a dummy here to show you the exact place to pinch at, but if I can have a volunteer from the audience? Male will do. Anyone?

[James Harrison]

I'll volunteer so long as I don't end up bleeding profusely...

[Athena]

Right. Ummmm....you're kind of tall, could you kind of stoop a little? *grabbing shoulders and pulling down* Thank you.

Now....I need to turn your head a little....if you go in here and pinch around this area....*pinching the left nape*...that could lead to a bad reaction. It could possibly result in bodily harm. You do not want this. If you pinch here however...*pinching the right nape*...you will get a more pleasant reaction. Once again, you want to check the model of female you are tinkering with. In fact, pinching in either place could result in bodily harm.

It's much simpler, and works on all models, if you go here...*grabbing the crook of the neck*...and rub gently. This can make the model do one of many things, none of which will result in you getting hurt. Purrs, moans, groans, and other sounds of pleasure will be the result, and you will know how to proceed next.

[James Harrison]

Right. Ummmm....you're kind of tall, could you kind of stoop a little? *grabbing shoulders and pulling down* Thank you.

Now....I need to turn your head a little....if you go in here and pinch around this area....*pinching the left nape*...that could lead to a bad reaction. It could possibly result in bodily harm. You do not want this. If you pinch here however...*pinching the right nape*...you will get a more pleasant reaction. Once again, you want to check the model of female you are tinkering with. In fact, pinching in either place could result in bodily harm.

It's much simpler, and works on all models, if you go here...*grabbing the crook of the neck*...and rub gently. This can make the model do one of many things, none of which will result in you getting hurt. Purrs, moans, groans, and other sounds of pleasure will be the result, and you will know how to proceed next.

That feels... quite nice, actually. 

[Rockula]

And the crowd of the 'scientifically' interested grows and grows. Another round everyone?

[James Harrison]

Yes please!    Any form of rum except Malibu or Bacardi would suit me down to the ground.