THOU SHALT / THOU SHALT NOT

[stockton_joans]

if at fist thou duth not succede, try again.
if thou still duth not succede, destroy all evidence or canabalise for spare parts.

failure in only an option for thine enemys

[TinkererInTraining]

Thy projects shall require a blood sacrifice at sometime to work properly.

[JackValentine]

Mine go in a particular order =p

Thou shalt remember to respect your tools.
Thou shalt acknowledge that table saws have no remorse.
Thou shalt spray blood everywhere when injured.
               This one just makes everything  worth it when you get back from the hospital =p
Thou shalt remember emergency rooms suck, just super glue it.

I was at our workshop and my mentor sliced his figure open on a table saw right in front of me on monday. It sucked. But we both get a big laugh out of it now. when we got back from the hospital, there was blood spatter from the saw spraying it everywhere. Fortunately no lost limbs, just big nasty gashes. So remember the First rule

[theMadTinker]

Thou shalt not waste thy heat.
Thou shalt not quench a forge-weld.
Thou shalt not leave thy piece in the fire unattended.
Thou shalt not leave any tool in thy hardy hole after thou hast finished using it.
Thou shalt always put tools back where they belong.

[SteamBlast Mary]

Thou shalt check the correct tool is plugged in before declaring "Why isn't the jigsaw working? And why is the toaster on ow ow ow".

Thou shalt remove the sprew from the worktop and surrounding area before preparing lunch on it. (Also true for any solvents that may have been involved).

Thou shalt come back from your local DIY store with the necessary part to repair the bathroom, not a selection of random items on the grounds that "they'd make super parts for my raygun!", no matter how pretty they are.

If you must return with a selection of items for one's raygun, thou shalt at least make sure they fit through the door.

Thou shalt remember: "It seemed like a good idea at the time" does not wash, except in cases where the result is certifiably hilarious.

[Alexander Edmund Clough]

Thou shalt always use a work shield as well as goggles when parting brass on a lathe.
Thou shalt NOT brush brass (or other metal) swarf off the bed of thy lathe with thy hands.

(Brass, when turned, chucks off sharp nasty swarf that loves getting in your hands as splinters. And parting brass on a lathe is EVIL for chucking out a high speed spray of little sharp shards of brass - hence the work shield).

Thou shalt always remove the chuck key before powering up the lathe.

(Not a mistake I've ever made, and not one I can make on my lathe - spring loaded chuck key + interlocked chuck cover so you cannot power up the lathe AT ALL which the key in the chuck. But thinking back many moons past, I saw someone power up a large lathe (12" chuck) back in the school days with the chuck key still in the chuck. - Chuck key launched across room AT SPEED. Could have been nasty.)

Thou shalt always centre punch where thou would'st drill.
Then thou shalt always start a pilot hole using a centre drill of appropriate size.

Thou shalt always covet more tools and addons for thy lathe, whether thou needest them or not! For so it is written in the book of the lathe.

When thou dost purchase a lathe, thou shalt find that thou hast developed a power tool fetish wherein thou shalt start window shopping for other machine tools...

(My "shopping list" at the moment is as follows: Fret / scroll saw for wood & plastic shaping and fine work, Belt / Disk sander, bench-top drill press, 6x4 metal cutting bandsaw for lopping bits of metal off of longer stock bars, Small milling machine.)

[Jemima Annabelle Clough]

When thou dost purchase a lathe, thou shalt find that thou hast developed a power tool fetish wherein thou shalt start window shopping for other machine tools...

(All I have to say to that is developed?? It was always there! :blinks: )

[Alexander Edmund Clough]

Oh, forgot one.

Though shalt always wear a suitable filter mask when working with epoxies, solvents and other chemicals which provoke bad headaches (or worse) if you breathe the fumes.

EVEN if working out doors or in a well ventilated area.

[Jemima Annabelle Clough]

The greenhouse built in violation of these commandments may be functional, but ugly. ( This project was required since the christmas pointsetta from 2 years ago is now a monster 6 feet high and four feet wide and won't fit through the door.)

Feel free to add commandments.

Thou shalt prune thy pointsettia.

With a poinsetta that big - thou shalt sell the poinsetta for an awful lot of money (for a plant)

[Dr cornelius quack]

Sack thou the poinsettia, they are bloody ugly things.

[Prof. George of Chaos]

Thou shalt have the pliers handy when soldering in case of...accidents with the iron.

[Marrock]

Thou shalt not reflexively grab the roofers shovel your father just welded when it falls off the workbench.

I still have scars from that one...

[Goggleyed]

Thou shalt turn of thine machine before setting thine electrode down.


I had a fuzzy white spot in the center of my vision for a few hours and a splitting head ache for a little while less.

[Prof Eumides Blakehurst]

Sack thou the poinsettia, they are bloody ugly things.

You should see some of the things in my garden... 

Fortunately the dracunculus have jsut stopped flowering and I can go outside without a gas mask! 

[SteamKit]

The one about the lathe reminded me of this one.

Thou shalt check thine sleeves before working with power tools.

Back in highschool a kid with long baggy sleeves damn near got his thumb taken off by a lathe because of that'n.

-Kit

[Mechanic]

Thou shalt ensure that thy missing square is not under the piece of plywood thou is about to cut with thy radial arm saw.

Also know as "whir, CLANG, thunk, f*ck" and the square embedded in the wall behind the saw.

[Marrock]

Thou shalt make sure to remove thine key from the chuck before starting the lathe.

My sophomore year machine shop, one of the freshman girls forgot that very thing... made an impressive hole in the wall forty feet away.

This was the same girl who, a week or so later, ran the carriage into the chuck at speed, made the entire lathe jump about four feet in the air.

[Vienna Fahrmann]

       If thou canst do it thyself, thou shalt remind thy spouse to do it, at suitably frequent intervals.

      Vienna

[Vienna Fahrmann]

     Thou shalt not go off to post on brassgoggles, while leaving the cap off the water cooker (to pour into the French Press for coffee) and cause a thick fog to form in the kitchen.

     Vienna

[Mal `e Diction]

Thou shalt have a cell phone or shop phone handy, for dialing 911 if the injury is beyond the benefit of bandages and salves.

[Marrock]

       If thou canst do it thyself, thou shalt remind thy spouse to do it, at suitably frequent intervals.

      Vienna

Thou shalt also learn to duck quickly to avoid the flung objects such reminders often engender.

[Alexander Edmund Clough]

This was the same girl who, a week or so later, ran the carriage into the chuck at speed, made the entire lathe jump about four feet in the air.

OW. That's going to f*ck up the lathe gearing!

And more on the lathe (and other beefy power tools)...

If thou hast long hair, thou shalt tie it back or preferably tie it up in a bun / shove it under a hair net. Thou SERIOUSLY dost not want thy head being yanked into the machine by thine hair when it gets snagged.

[Marrock]

OW. That's going to f*ck up the lathe gearing!

And more on the lathe (and other beefy power tools)...

If thou hast long hair, thou shalt tie it back or preferably tie it up in a bun / shove it under a hair net. Thou SERIOUSLY dost not want thy head being yanked into the machine by thine hair when it gets snagged.

Unfortunately, that instance occurred before we all learned how to cut gears from cellulose, those broke before anything else and were cheap and easy to replace.

[Hikaro Takayama]

If, in the course of shopping for thine project, thou cometh upon some things of absolute coolness, thou shalt buy at least two of those things, for lo: When thou returnest to the store, thou willst not find those things ever again.

....Learned that the hard way:  I went to the local Michaels, and found some really neat typewriter key cap scrapbooking charms and only bought one bag (each bag had the full alphabet and dupes of the more common letters).  When I didscovered I'd need more for my keyboard project, I went back to Michaels, only to find they didn't have any more, and recently, when searching for them on the internet, I found out they'd been discontinued.

[groomporter]

While consturcting a temporary greenhouse

shalt not throw stones?