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Author Topic: Single Steampunks?  (Read 353800 times)
The Abiliegh
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


Wench with a Wrench

The_Abi
« Reply #700 on: April 01, 2009, 06:58:08 pm »

What is all that bulldada with eternal, exclusive love? Not my style at all! Better a good friend you also happen to f...noozle from time to time than a full on exclusive thing! At least that's my tuppence.

I must say I love the way this Germanic man thinks.

I'm of much the same mentality, but I can go either way, really. It's really dependant upon what the other person needs. Not everyone is comfortable with sharing, unfortunately.

Oh I agree. I'm in an exclusive relationship at the moment and I am comfortable with it with no intentions of straying. However I must say that I also enjoyed the situations where it was just casual dating or friends with benefits. I do admit though that those situations are hard to maintain for a given period of time because it all comes down to the people involved. If one or the other is the jealous type, then there is going to be drama, or if someone starts developing serious feelings and the other person isn't, then drama again. It all kind of relies on a mutual understanding that its about having someone to hang out with, enjoy a bit of company, and getting the rocks off without getting deeply emotionally involved.

Sometimes.

There is also the situation of getting deeply involved, and yet still being able to add a little variety, with rules, of course.

I would have to say that would be possibly the most difficult. Not impossible, but still hard to pull off none the less. I hear more horror stories than success stories. Personally I have always been straight forward with what I want even before a date is planned. I prefer to lead a very drama filled life.

It is *very* much dependant upon the people involved. I do see it work pretty regularly, however.
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Dusza Beben
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States



« Reply #701 on: April 02, 2009, 12:21:49 am »

Though this is in no way meant to discourage any of our younger singles (male or female) I would like to point out tha I myself was a late bloomer.
I had one serious girlfriend in highschool, during my senior year. College was an entirely different affair though. At one point I was dating five girls at the same time!
YES, they all knew, any other approach is asking for trouble. I know it sounds stupid and clichet but BE YOURSELF. Unless you're a complete jackass, I have no patience for those.
Sometimes it's location, but usually it's attitude. If you find yourself attractive and witty others will too! If you are constantly bemoaning your dreadfullnes then guess what, that is exactly what you project to the world.

Also, the whole "All the good ones are taken." arguement begs one question. Why aren't you taking them back? It worked for me.  Wink
Happily married for 12 years to a beautiful woman that was living with another man when I met her.  Though it does happen in VERY RARE cases, nobody is generally going to
hand you a perfect match. Young love shouldn't even be about finding a perfect match, it should be about feeling, excitement and exploration.
In meeting and loving many types of lovers you also learn about yourself. What you like, what your willing to compromise on, the kind of person you may want to wed or not wed
as your preferences go. Oh, and it will hurt like hell when it ends.
Unless of course the end of the relationship is pure bliss. Either way is O.K. It goes with the territory as it were.

There's lots more, but I'm rambling...

DB

 
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Celerity
Gunner
**
United States United States


Reporting for duty !


« Reply #702 on: April 02, 2009, 02:43:39 am »

I disagree with a lot of it - staying with someone "until something better comes along" is a serious character flaw, BUT a lot of times someone doesn't realise that they are in a miserable relationship until they witness something better come along. It's a classic catch-22.  I settled for "If I am that guy, then I will leave my current mate, but NOT go for the new mate".   Golden Parachuting out of a relationship is just a cowardly thing in my book. Also, I have no proof that the new relationship won't end that way too.

From a job ? Not so much. Protectionism is different when the affected parties "have deep wallets".  If she's with a guy who will find another pretty quickly, then the collateral damage is pretty minimal.  Would any of us feel pity if Brat Pitt were left for another guy ? Deep pockets, so to say.

But on a lighter note:   I went out to the gas station to fund the bailouts with a $6 pack of cigs - and I steamed up the convenience store. A girl followed me in, and followed me out and sparked a conversation about my appearance in the parking lot.  She mentioned that "Whatever it is your wearing, it's pretty hot".  She went on to mention that she had a boyfriend, but just had to tell me that.

Punk it up, Singletons !  It gives them a good opener for a conversation.
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Not once have they put gold in my pocket, but they put a smile on my face; therefore I declare them "good".
Captain Spooner
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States

Just your average tinkering steamy ninja.


« Reply #703 on: April 02, 2009, 04:23:01 am »

I respectfully disagree with your philosophy there, Mr. Celerity. There is nothing cowardly about opting for a different companion if you meet her while currently attached, provided that one ends the current relationship before beginning one with the new belle/beau.  Now if one does not end said relationship before pursuing the new one, that is a despicable and dishonest act that bears no honor. And in my opinion a relationship begins the first time one approaches the person with romantic intentions, hence asking the person out starts the relationship, not after you have been on a couple dates and figured out you want to be with this new person.  Now personally if I am in a relationship where I am disinterested in the lady enough to become interested in another, I end the relationship, weather or not I intend to pursue another at that time.

Now on the subject of casual sexual relations. I have been in a couple open relationships, had a couple of f*ck buddies, and spent a year man whoring my way through some local bars. All this experience has led to one marvelous and enlightening revelation. Sex without a deeper emotional connection bores the living hell out of me. Seriously, its dull, requires an enormous amount of energy input, and if the evening begins in a bar or other such location it is an extremely expensive proposition as well. Others may have had better experiences with it but as far as I am concerned there are easier ways to obtain a natural dopamine rush. (this is the internet after all)

And to Mr. Beben, quite well put sir, quite well. It always seems to me that youngsters are in far to much of a rush to be in a relationship.  You kids have time, trust me.

Regards,
Spooner
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Silkstone
Gunner
**
Canada Canada


Your False North


« Reply #704 on: April 02, 2009, 05:06:16 am »

"some of us would settle for a cuddle ."
*stamps big green AGREED print on statement*

"Now if one does not end said relationship before pursuing the new one, that is a despicable and dishonest act that bears no honor."
"Now personally if I am in a relationship where I am disinterested in the lady enough to become interested in another, I end the relationship, weather or not I intend to pursue another at that time."
Dear Captain Spooner,
You sir, are one of the smartest people I believe I have ever heard from. Thank you for taking the time to pen your thoughts.
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bizarre_chicken
Zeppelin Admiral
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United Kingdom United Kingdom


I like vegetarians, but I couldn't eat a whole one


WWW
« Reply #705 on: April 02, 2009, 11:59:32 am »

See, I'm confused here.
My problem lies not in underconfidence or an inability to make my feelings clear, indeed, I've had a plethora of different partners over the years, and the getting of them has never been much of a problem for me. The problem now is that for some reason, nothing is happening. I'm not meeting anyone, and I can't quite pin down the reason why.
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eggberta echegaray
Officer
***
Canada Canada


Eggberta
« Reply #706 on: April 02, 2009, 01:24:38 pm »

Quote
The problem now is that for some reason, nothing is happening. I'm not meeting anyone, and I can't quite pin down the reason why.

I can so totally relate to you with this...but I did meet a man, who was very interested in me, but I couldn't hack being around him, for he was very annoying, and he had the most absolutely stench smelling breath *chokes* Funnily enough, he met someone, and is now in a steady relationship. Maybe his gf injects a syringe of mouthwash into his mouth when he's sleeping or something...Anyhow, All the best to him with regards to that...but yet I'm still single *grumbles* Then, there's this fella who I work with, who is freshly out of a 5 and a 1/2 year relationship...Of all places, he happened to go to this ex gf of the said 5 and a 1/2 year's birthday party of all places, and he meets the current girl he is dating now? I don't get it! *bangs head on table* I don't know what else to do, other than what I am doing now, which is short of nothing. LOL! I do seriously give up on it all, as I have grown too comfortably numb with being single. Glum outlook, but meh...I'm exhausted by it all. 
« Last Edit: April 02, 2009, 01:37:49 pm by eggberta echegaray » Logged

"She's got a touch of Tuesday Weld and has the right dynamics for the new frontier"
Mister Griffiths
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United Kingdom United Kingdom


WWW
« Reply #707 on: April 02, 2009, 02:10:05 pm »

Well, not that it really matters much in the grand scheme of things that this gets publicly known, I just have a compulsion to type out my current situation relationship-wise. And that was a terribly constructed sentence :s

I'm currently enamoured of a girl, in a full-on, scarily perfect kind of way......I don't feel the need to change anything about myself in order to make her happy (and this is indeed a novelty, i'm used to needing to adapt to at least something in order to keep the peace), and she feels the same. We act like a couple most of the time, holding hands, cuddling etc, and I am happier than I have ever been at just that, and yet there is a small problem with all this. The lady in question has had one or two issues in the past that have made her withdraw into herself somewhat, and as a result is unable to cope with a relationship because it makes her feel 'owned'. I think I get where she is coming from on this, and i've told her i'd never want to own her, just be with her. Every so often we have very...in depth conversations about it all, and I think the conclusion we have come to is that it's best to think of her as a companion: more than a friend, but not quite a relationship.

Oh, and she doesn't really like physical contact in some respects, so this isn't one of those friends-with-benefits arrangements I hear tell of, before the wrong end of the stick is grabbed Wink

But yes, this little outpouring was more for my own benefit than anything else, but if anyone has any thoughts on the situation i'd be interested to hear them!

Mister Griffiths
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Titus Wells
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Forward The Steamtomaton Apocalypse!


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« Reply #708 on: April 02, 2009, 07:24:51 pm »

I can't believe I'm acting as though I were qualified to give advice!

Giving advice is merely attempting to look at a situation through someone else's eyes and draw on our own experience, knowledge of the protagonists and what we have been told by others in an attempt to make comparisons and decide a 'best route' for the future. Therefore anybody with experience (that's everybody) and an amount of hearsay (I'd say that was pretty much everyone too) can give advice.

Giving GOOD advice... now that's an entirely different scaphium de piscis!
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MWBailey
Guest
« Reply #709 on: April 02, 2009, 11:29:09 pm »

Hello. I've posted on here a few times (okay, once, maybe). Like a lot of the fellows on here, I'm pretty much at loose ends, and have been for a while. There are reasons (some of them to do with "burnt fingers," so to speak, and others to do with just never having been too terribly confident; like what I would think is a lot of people, I see my shortcomings magnified.

For almost all of my "adult" life so far, I've listened to the people who said, "don't worry, things'll work out, you don't need to get uptight about it, you've got plenty of time, there're plenty of other fish in the sea, There's someone for everybody, you just have to wait, becareful what you wishfor, you might get it, you'll find someone eventually ..."

Well, now I'm on the far side of 47, have diabetes, going bald, more ailments, it sometimes seems, than I have body parts to hang 'em on...no actual experience (yes I do mean to refer to what you think that that sounds like) and damned few prospects. hell. NO prospects.

So, I wont waste people's time with feel-good advice. I will say these things:
1.DO worry. Go ahead and get out there, and don't listen to the people who say you have plenty of time,
2. Because you DON'T. Speaking from personal experience.
3. Yep, there're lots of fish in the sea, but the older you get, the more likely it will be that the sea will be overfished. So get your pole, or net, or whatever and get out there and fish like you mean it. I didn't, and looky what I haven't got.
4. If there really were somebody for everybody, then everybody would have somebody. Guess what? This thread  wouldn't exist!
5. You don't "have to" wait. thats just a ploy that people use to make you go away and leave them alone (actually all of the above are, in truth).
6. I've never gotten anything I've wished for, (or prayed for) in the romantic department (no, I'm not just feeling sorry for myself, either), so apparently there's no truth in that statement whatsoever.
7. looking to find someone "eventually" will just make you wait your whole life for someone who isn't going to show up. I know. I did.

Go ahead and get out there and LIVE, and dont let preachers or parents or deacons or teachers or anybody tell you that there's anything wrong with it. I listened to them, and speaking from personal experience, it's ALL garbage.

If anybody can stand a curmudgeonly old banjo player (oh, come on, you knew this was coming, admit it) then I'm in Houston, Texas, somewhere, looking for my car keys...

MWBailey
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MWBailey
Guest
« Reply #710 on: April 03, 2009, 01:04:48 am »

Mr. Bailey, you're so very right, thats some damn fine advice Smiley ... so fine I had to make this Smiley





Hmmmm...you know, if I can do a few more like this, I could write a book, get famous, and hmmmm...
I'm not really that negative all the time, but sometimes it does sort of all build up and explode all over the place; I just figured maybe I could do some good with it for once. Don't worry, I wont start stalking any of the ladies on here...um...unless they ask me to... Wink

Seriously, Jinglejoe, thanks, I'm utterly flattered.

MWBailey
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The Abiliegh
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


Wench with a Wrench

The_Abi
« Reply #711 on: April 03, 2009, 01:58:21 am »

Mr. Bailey, you're so very right, thats some damn fine advice Smiley ... so fine I had to make this Smiley





Hmmmm...you know, if I can do a few more like this, I could write a book, get famous, and hmmmm...
I'm not really that negative all the time, but sometimes it does sort of all build up and explode all over the place; I just figured maybe I could do some good with it for once. Don't worry, I wont start stalking any of the ladies on here...um...unless they ask me to... Wink

Seriously, Jinglejoe, thanks, I'm utterly flattered.

MWBailey



::chuckles:: I don't think that i wish to be stalked, but as a fellow Texan, I certainly invite you to meet up with us some time! I've got a few steamy friends in you're area. We might be making a go of ApolloCon in June...

I'm also working on setting up an evening or afternoon get together in San Antonio for sometime soon (May, likely). You're more than welcome to join us!
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SillyLilPuppet
Snr. Officer
****
United States United States



« Reply #712 on: April 03, 2009, 05:48:19 am »

I guess I might as well post in here...Hi, I'm Puppet, I'm a relationship failure! Cheesy The longest relationship (and I use this term loosely) I've ever had lasted a week, from first to last date. I'm incredibly socially awkward, shy, oblivious, and unexperienced when it comes to even an attempt at flirting, and have a tendency to mistake flirting for friendliness and vice versa.  So should anyone want to make an attempt, go ahead, but you have been warned. >>;
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The Abiliegh
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


Wench with a Wrench

The_Abi
« Reply #713 on: April 03, 2009, 04:45:28 pm »

Quick throwback to the friends with benefits mini discussion. I found this pretty funny.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)


That is win
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Skinner
Snr. Officer
****
United Kingdom United Kingdom


Captain Charlotte J. Skinner, Airship Scalleywag


« Reply #714 on: April 03, 2009, 07:32:46 pm »

For Silkstone, who asked me about my prom situation.

I'm settling on the Sixth form Committee chair, because he's a respectable young man and totally disinterested in me other than in an intellectual and LAN party basis. He's also going to be there early to set up the hall, so I don't have to worry about arriving in some stylish limo, and I can splash out on my outfit (Which is going to be as steamy as I can make it =P top hat and all.)

I'm not all that concerned about this prom, anyway. It's one last huzzah from a school I abhore and peers I don't get along with!

At the University I'm going to in September, if they do dances, I'll have more of a chance. They have an LGBT Society, so hopefully I can impose my charm on some unattached Sapphist females.
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Silkstone
Gunner
**
Canada Canada


Your False North


« Reply #715 on: April 03, 2009, 07:42:40 pm »

"It's one last huzzah from a school I abhore and peers I don't get along with"
 Cheesy Three cheers for prom night. Hopefully he'll at the very least be a good dancing partner. And who knows? Maybe you'll meet someone along at the dance who just settled for someone else. Best of luck! *throws corsages at*
And if the LGBT isn't a way to meet the ladies I don't know what is  Smiley. I've heard universities are all full of dances, and I'm happy 'bout that 'cause I don't want to wear my dress just once. It's so full of victorian-goodness win  Grin Are you going a-dressed, a-suitvested, or some other amoglemationof steamy goodness?

"Quick throwback to the friends with benefits mini discussion. I found this pretty funny."
So full of win that chart is, I believe it should be posted in the hallways of my school *shifty eyes*

"So "nice goggles, wanna f*ck do something inappropriate" isn't a good pickup line on you? good to know. "
Well, if you're complimenting my glasses that's another story...  Cheesy

"speak of pickup lines what are some of everyone's favorites? "
There's a commercial for a pickup-line show that has a few... I can't help but laugh at the absurdity of 'Nice legs, when do they open? I've lost my bed, can I borrow yours?'
« Last Edit: April 03, 2009, 07:59:06 pm by Silkstone » Logged
S.Sprocket
Administrator
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States


Industria Proficiscor In!


« Reply #716 on: April 06, 2009, 09:21:01 pm »

Alright Ladies and Gents, Plot thickens for me.


I'm not going to say that I'm no longer single, because that would be a lie.  I have no girlfriend and I am very much still single...  And yet..  it's not that easy.


I am now part of an intricate plan that basically has the potential to win even if it fails.  I won't name names or jinx myself in any way except that I've been finding a strange therapeutic quality to my musical selections this past 2 weeks.  I've been learning a lot from a minor band called Paramore.


And I say no more until I see some results.
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"Teaching boys to bake cakes? That's no way to maintain an industrial empire." --Fred Dibnah
Silkstone
Gunner
**
Canada Canada


Your False North


« Reply #717 on: April 07, 2009, 01:48:32 am »

"One would think, if you were trying to persuade a woman into being your gal that you'd *at least* do it with a phone call..."
One would think that a phone is a suitable projectile object if one came in visible contact of that person Tongue

I am definitely not up with the trend of texting. I've only very recently gotten a cell phone (it was getting too difficult not having a phone to be able to contact rides and such) and I rather dislike seeing people wandering around in the halls with their heads bent down, when there's real live people right beside them :O I personaly am all about the body language, I really need to get a feel for what someone is saying and feeling that way. And visa versa, I am extremely sarcastic and people never catch it if I'm typing. I don't think I would ever hook up with someone who was an addicted excessive texter, especially if they did it while I'm with them. That's what I hate most, when friends are hanging out together and three are bent down talking(texting) someone else. -rant over-

SPROCKET! HYU CAN DO EET! *waves flags of victory*

Clockwork - time for rehab?

And as of yet, I do not have a pair of glasses, but hopefully sometime this week I'm getting myself to an antique store to look for some goggles. Who knows? You might get to see my pretty little blue eyes yet.


And also as of yet I don't have a date for prom/grad, and neither do I have my eye on anyone. *sigh* Anyone wanna fly to Canada and play gentleman to me? Or lady, at the moment as long as your gallant and present me flowers I'll play along  Cheesy
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Magister
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States


First Mate - The Brass Falcon Airship


« Reply #718 on: April 07, 2009, 10:15:13 am »

I'm guilty of texting more than I talk on the phone, but I have a phobia of talking on the phone.  Well, I call it a phobia but its more an inability to focus while on the phone.  If I'm talking to someone, I have to talk face to face, otherwise, its down to the written word for me.

I know what you mean about that phone phobia, particularly with strangers I tend to get to easily agitated on the phone.

I could never get into the whole texting thing though. I never really even liked using instant messenger on the computer.

For some reason, I always felt texting was even worse, too much effort with too much ambiguity, eventually I actually sought out a cell phone plan that didn't have text messaging just so I had an excuse for not texting people.

Of course, that's cost me more than a couple of social connections, since texting is quickly coming to dominate communications.
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Angus A Fitziron
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*******
United Kingdom United Kingdom

Research Air Ship R.A.S. 'Saorsa'


« Reply #719 on: April 07, 2009, 09:18:39 pm »

I'm guilty of texting more than I talk on the phone, but I have a phobia of talking on the phone.  Well, I call it a phobia but its more an inability to focus while on the phone.  If I'm talking to someone, I have to talk face to face, otherwise, its down to the written word for me.
I find that fascinating and I guess these days not being fully at ease on the 'phone can be difficult. I experienced completely the opposite. One of my daughters has Aspergers Syndrome and for a time, the only way I could have proper father / daughter conversations was by ringing her from work. Her condition made it impossible for her to focus on what I was saying if she could see my face and body language at the same time. Information overload! All the best, keep texting, affordable video phones must be just round the corner  Wink
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darkshines
Rogue Ætherlord
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Wales Wales


Miss Katonic 1898


« Reply #720 on: April 10, 2009, 12:27:22 pm »

Honestly, I know the feeling. If I ever DID see another steampunk walking down the street, or hovering over my head on some kind of steam powered jet pack, I would assume they are married, or not interested. I would admire from afar, and be desperate for conversation, but would be worried about how to introduce myself!
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The Abiliegh
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


Wench with a Wrench

The_Abi
« Reply #721 on: April 10, 2009, 02:03:09 pm »

I would admire from afar, and be desperate for conversation, but would be worried about how to introduce myself!
I would do quite the opposite, I'd run to them and point feverently back and forth between our goggles, at this point they will either look terribly confused and scared at which point I say "We're steampunk!" and if they are still confused then I have alot of explaining to do! or they will grin immensley and we'll both chime "STEAMPUNK!" At which point I will gingerly introduce myself but come on too strong Roll Eyes



oh yeah! I know totally know how to meet people in real life Cheesy

You and I would get along ::grins::

I have the benefit of doing most of my Steampunking in locales that facilitate conversation. (I can't dress up too much for work, which makes me sad). So, when I *am* dressed to the nines, I'm either clubbing or at Amtgard. Clubs, well, you shout "Nice Goggles!" and conversation often progresses and ends uip on thesmoking patio, and, well, at amtgard, nearly everyone knows me, and if they don't, there is someone within 5 feet to tell them to feel free to say hello, as Abi is notriously friendly and fun to talk to.

And yet, I'm still single, lol. At least though, for me, there is no reason past my own desire to be so.
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The Abiliegh
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


Wench with a Wrench

The_Abi
« Reply #722 on: April 13, 2009, 04:43:56 pm »


You say that like you're having to beat off suitors with a stick.

There are weekends....

Granted, the fact that I hit people with sticks *every* weekend has something to do with the validity of the latter part. That also lends itself to a rather large dating pool of like minded people. The distance factor is often my savior.
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Celerity
Gunner
**
United States United States


Reporting for duty !


« Reply #723 on: April 13, 2009, 04:57:37 pm »

I went and punked it out at two of my friend's shows this weekends.  One is a legit punk show, with a HUGE crowd, and I struck out about 10 times throughout the night (It was big enough of a venue that I could breeze from one region of the show to another without turning into a desperado)  Not one girl actually came to talk to me, which surprised even myself.  It was raining out and I looked like a brillo pad anyway.

Second night was a small show, and I had a drunk chick attempt with me, and she left with 3 bikers (I'm not kidding.. 3 gang-bikers!)

The bar tender seemed interested in the goggles, but she was a bartender and they are off-limits. I'm older now, I understand that.   She did ask me to get a guy outside to stop harassing her customers.
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Skinner
Snr. Officer
****
United Kingdom United Kingdom


Captain Charlotte J. Skinner, Airship Scalleywag


« Reply #724 on: April 14, 2009, 12:33:02 am »

-is painfully aware that there are no females in the UK reading this that are single or interested in Sapphism-

You know what? I could get a mad scientist to make me a clockwork girlfriend...

...On second thoughts I'd probably end up scrapping her for spare ship parts. Ah, Sigh.
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