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Author Topic: Single Steampunks?  (Read 355021 times)
Titus Wells
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« Reply #600 on: March 15, 2009, 10:17:39 am »

So, until I find someone totally worth my time I'll stay single.

Yup, and then you'll find somebody and they won't want to know. Which is fine, you'll get over it, and then you find the most amazing person in the world, who admits to being totally enthralled and can't take their eyes off you, but just happens to already be in a relationship with someone else and so the geatest pairing the world has ever known can never be..... sigh.
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« Reply #601 on: March 15, 2009, 03:57:09 pm »

And now reading the last few pages has made me feel even more isolated. None of this has ever happened to me. I'm also one of those " I wonder what would happen if..." types. But less so now. I used to wonder what it would be like to go out with someone, to spend that much time with someone. But not any more, not for many years actually.
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hatchleader
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« Reply #602 on: March 15, 2009, 05:26:21 pm »

And now reading the last few pages has made me feel even more isolated. None of this has ever happened to me. I'm also one of those " I wonder what would happen if..." types. But less so now. I used to wonder what it would be like to go out with someone, to spend that much time with someone. But not any more, not for many years actually.

This is kind of a catch 22 thread tho... the people on here are single... which means that any relationships they have had have ended... and most end badly! which means lots of stories about how bad things are in relationships!

To swing it back in a positive direction, my best friend and his lass have been together for 4 1/2 years and he loves being with her, and my bro is getting married next summer because he found the right girl. Ultimatly all long term relationships are a risk, but in the end if you find the right one then it will change your life forever.

Now i'm gonna go put on a frilly dress as i officially have no balls after coming out with that sentimental crap!! Cheesy
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« Reply #603 on: March 15, 2009, 05:46:49 pm »

And now reading the last few pages has made me feel even more isolated. None of this has ever happened to me. I'm also one of those " I wonder what would happen if..." types. But less so now. I used to wonder what it would be like to go out with someone, to spend that much time with someone. But not any more, not for many years actually.

This is kind of a catch 22 thread tho... the people on here are single... which means that any relationships they have had have ended... and most end badly! which means lots of stories about how bad things are in relationships!

To swing it back in a positive direction, my best friend and his lass have been together for 4 1/2 years and he loves being with her, and my bro is getting married next summer because he found the right girl. Ultimatly all long term relationships are a risk, but in the end if you find the right one then it will change your life forever.

Now i'm gonna go put on a frilly dress as i officially have no balls after coming out with that sentimental crap!! Cheesy

Agreed, without taking that leap of faith, there is absolutely no chance of completing your jump, no matter how many times you fall in practice.

And there is absolutely nothing wrong with sentimental men : )

there is nothing wrong with men in frilly dresses either Tongue



This is dredging up some bad memories on my end.  I, unfortunately, very much broke the heart of the guy I was with in high school (he thought "love" meant forever. I knew it was high school.) and months after breaking up with him (i didn't cheat, I wouldn't do that) when he should have been over me but wasn't, I fell for and had a fling with his best friend.  It destroyed him when he found out and the friend destroyed me.  I hate myself for it every day.  
The one good thing that came of all that is that the friend introduced me to steampunk, so I suppose I wouldn't be here if that hadn't happened.
Anyway, I have a new guy now who's smart enough to know that we're young yet and this won't last forever.  
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KatarinaNavane
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« Reply #604 on: March 15, 2009, 07:52:03 pm »

when I was visiting the UK last summer I had two separate people ask if I was french.  Interestingly the second didn't really ask they just assumed I was french and started speaking in french to me.  Not sure why...
Also had at least three schoolboy types who couldn't have been older than about 13 hit on me.  Very odd. 
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E.A. Claringbold
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« Reply #605 on: March 15, 2009, 07:58:58 pm »

Someone asked me the other day if I was Russian. How odd. Do I have the look of the Russian about me???

*Pops back in*

Hmmm...I really don't know. Based the one Russian transfer student I know, no...but that's only one person. >__>

There was one time I made a call inquiring about the Navy and their offer/plan for medical students etc. and somewhere in between as he was asking me questions (age, contacts, school, etc.) he asked me if I was Russian...and I told him no and responded that I was Korean-American. He then told me that I sounded Russian...Which is strange because I'm pretty sure I don't sound Russian.
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Pheobsky
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« Reply #606 on: March 15, 2009, 11:34:02 pm »

And now reading the last few pages has made me feel even more isolated. None of this has ever happened to me. I'm also one of those " I wonder what would happen if..." types. But less so now. I used to wonder what it would be like to go out with someone, to spend that much time with someone. But not any more, not for many years actually.

This is kind of a catch 22 thread tho... the people on here are single... which means that any relationships they have had have ended... and most end badly! which means lots of stories about how bad things are in relationships!

Not true! not true!
my (few) relationships haven't been too bad, and have ended well -however thats due to particular circumstances and fairly easygoing breakups.

Quote from: KatarinaNavane link=topic=11620.msg297529#msg297529 date=12371//35609
there is nothing wrong with men in frilly dresses either Tongue
hmm I dont have an issue with dresses....however frilly dresses are quite a different issue regardless of who's wearing them...
Quote from: KatarinaNavane link=topic=11620.msg297529#msg297529 date=12371//35609
This is dredging up some bad memories on my end.  I, unfortunately, very much broke the heart of the guy I was with in high school (he thought "love" meant forever. I knew it was high school.) and months after breaking up with him (i didn't cheat, I wouldn't do that) when he should have been over me but wasn't, I fell for and had a fling with his best friend.  It destroyed him when he found out and the friend destroyed me.  I hate myself for it every day.  
The one good thing that came of all that is that the friend introduced me to steampunk, so I suppose I wouldn't be here if that hadn't happened.
It sounds like you probably did the right thing, if he didn't realise it was a highschool romance it is harsh, but its probably better not to be stuck in something too serious for the situation... and to be honest its better that he had to deal with these things before leaving school, than never to have experienced them at all untill later. As for the friend thing, to be honest these things happen, its unfortunate that it was his best friend, but falling for people is a matter of the heart, so its not realy too much your fault.
Plus you heard about steampunk so bonus!

Quote from: KatarinaNavane link=topic=11620.msg297529#msg297529 date=12371//35609
Anyway, I have a new guy now who's smart enough to know that we're young yet and this won't last forever.  

Probably the best way to be! enjoy it and see where it goes Grin
« Last Edit: March 15, 2009, 11:38:05 pm by Pheobsky » Logged

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« Reply #607 on: March 16, 2009, 03:41:06 pm »

I'm usually a sharer, but eh. Not this time around I guess. My stories and experiences end in similar fashion. Tears, raised voices, words you can't take back, property damage, being shot at, and GBH. Sometimes I was the heart breaker and sometimes I was the heartbroken. There is a song lyrics that goes, "And all the harm I've ever done, alas it was to none but me." I look back sometimes and wish it were true. Some of them didn't deserve it.
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The Abiliegh
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« Reply #608 on: March 16, 2009, 04:30:17 pm »

Whoa.. I'm busy for a few days and this thread explodes...

There was a sentiment expressed a few pages back about thinking perhaps it is time to get your heart broken. THAT stuck with me through the long read.

I used to think like that. Until it happened. I thought I was missing out on some vital information and experience that perhaps i needed to have. You're better off not having that happen. Heartbreak is aptly named, and it's more painful than any physical injury I have ever sustained (and those are plentifyul, I assure you).

I could share stories, but they are either a) too long/intimate for a public forum, or b) too alike stories already shared. Let it be enough to know that I've had the break-ups, the pain, the physical altercations, the fear, the uncertainty, the hate... all of it. And yet, even through all of that, i'm friends with nearly all of my ex's (and those are plentiful as well >_<).
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Titus Wells
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« Reply #609 on: March 17, 2009, 12:16:01 am »

Well...

It's depressing, sure, but I don't think it's all that bad. Just something that takes time.

Incidently, I think the 'alternative' and 'artistic' subculture/s we thrive in are one of the stumbling blocks to conventional relationships so we should maybe work on a principle of matching up single guys and gals on here.

Any takers for meeting up in the west country UK region?  Wink Cheesy
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Captain Spooner
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« Reply #610 on: March 17, 2009, 09:41:29 am »

Wow, that was a whole lot of angst to read through.  I will only say this about the time to get ones heart broken thing.  Heartache is weakness leaving the soul.  It sucks, it hurts, then it ebbs and its time to cowboy up afterwords.  Yes there are stories to tell but I call them the past because I'm past them. If you aren't past them thats cool too and I would love to buy you a brew and commiserate into the wee hour of the morn, but for the moment lets try to bring the mood up a little shall we.  How about this as a rather amusing way to change the subject while still keeping on the subjects of singleness and the difficulties thereof, What is the silliest damned stupid thing you have ever done to get the attention or admiration of a beau/belle? I'll go first. The scene is Lake Superior in January, ice fishing. It is my first year attending Michigan Technological University in Houghton, Mi. ( where the men are men, and so are half the women) and am on a mixer of sorts with a young lady who I have been somewhat enamored with. Now most would assume that going ice fishing would indicate to any reasonable person would signify wearing clothing that would allow for an extended period of time but she apparently went for style rather than practicality(in her defense, she was looking good). "Whats that my dear, you are a little cold sitting on the ice block? Well here, have my carhardt bib overalls, they'll keep you warm, and waterproof. No I'll be fine in my sweatpants. Oh and your arms are cold? well by all means have the inner liner to my parka. I'll be fine with just the shell to cut the wind. lets get back to our conversation" cut scene and move on three hours the lady disapeared an hour ago to speak with a friend saying she should be back in a few minutes. It is now time to leave and I am frozen,literally to the block of ice I was using as a seat. The heat of my body had melted some of the surface ice and alowed the sweatpants to soak some of the water in and then let it refreeze. we now need to remove me from said pants but the lady who is still wearing my overalls is nowhere to be found, turns out that she and the friend have left 20 minutes ago to meet up with a couple of guys the friend knows. Fortunately one of the others on this trip had brought a blanket with him, but I can tell you that walking home from the ride lot with a blanket kilt wrapped around your long underware clad lower half while nursing a quickly worsening cold is a humbling experience to say the least. End game. When I went to track down my outerware once I had finally kicked that cold, I found her preparing for a date with one of the guys she left the mixer to meet with, but hey I got my gear back. And Still when I hear a lady lament the temperature my first reaction is still to offer my coat.  Guess I will live and not learn.

Regards,
Spooner
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helios
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« Reply #611 on: March 18, 2009, 05:27:38 am »

Looking back, I would say I'm a hopeless romantic. Also, It is becoming apparent that I have quite strong parenting instincts. Strange. Maybe I just need to find the right girl.
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« Reply #612 on: March 18, 2009, 07:35:08 am »

Never understood the guys who hate children. They have the most interesting view of the world. I swear never to grow up and so far I have suceeded in this endevor including my hidious spelling skills. (Joking about the spelling though it's true) Kids are simple to understand and keep under control. As long as you don't expect said child to sit still and watch TV all day, kids require attention and movement. I can handle most of my little cusins and my baby sister better than their parents, it's not hard, just don't act like you're their betters. Listen to them, talk with them, and play with them. Thats all any kid really needs, if you do that they'll do what you say. (With the exception of my evil cusin. I swear she is the devil, or at least brought up horribly, even I can't control her. Funny thing is her brother is the best kid I've ever babysat.)
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Samuel
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« Reply #613 on: March 18, 2009, 09:27:47 am »

Is it wierd that I'm a guy, and I dream of having kids one day?

Incredibly weird. Tongue Wink

I can't stand the idea of having kids. I am 18, so it might change, unless I get a vasectomy or something.

I don't want to raise a child. Period.  I see children as a very, very illogical gamble. but that's me.


...Is it weird that I'm a girl and I plan to never have biological children and any under the age of eight? (I intend to become a foster mom for troubled teens, after having several friends in the foster system... I think I may have mentioned this before actually XD)

yeah, I might just adopt a 21 year old. so much easier. Tongue

« Last Edit: March 18, 2009, 09:30:04 am by Samuel » Logged

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« Reply #614 on: March 18, 2009, 09:57:01 am »


I can't stand the idea of having kids. I am 18, so it might change, unless I get a vasectomy or something.

I don't want to raise a child. Period.  I see children as a very, very illogical gamble. but that's me.


yeah, I might just adopt a 21 year old. so much easier. Tongue



I think that view will change once poepl you know start having children and you're exposed to the joys that they are. As to being a gamble, that seems an odd view. What exactly do you mean?

Having said that, please take away the snotty, dribbling, screaming baby and bring it back when it's four!

I'm 18. I have a 4 year old brother. My mum is in her 40's. I have done a lot of his bringing up. I do NOT want small children. The End.

Fine, I'll admit to having 1% of me stay open to the possibility, but really, I'm not interested in bringing another child in to this world when: a. I really dislike babies. and b. the are way to many children in need of homes.
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Samuel
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« Reply #615 on: March 18, 2009, 10:53:39 am »


I can't stand the idea of having kids. I am 18, so it might change, unless I get a vasectomy or something.

I don't want to raise a child. Period.  I see children as a very, very illogical gamble. but that's me.


yeah, I might just adopt a 21 year old. so much easier. Tongue



I think that view will change once poepl you know start having children and you're exposed to the joys that they are. As to being a gamble, that seems an odd view. What exactly do you mean?

Having said that, please take away the snotty, dribbling, screaming baby and bring it back when it's four!

the gamble is, how will your child end up? will he exceed you, or will he be one of those who rely on others just to exist? will he resent you? will he love you? will you resent it? plus, and this seems shallow, but I think children would be a risky investment too. I'm in a aging population, so maybe its just the clime.
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Titus Wells
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« Reply #616 on: March 18, 2009, 12:59:31 pm »

the gamble is, how will your child end up? will he exceed you, or will he be one of those who rely on others just to exist? will he resent you? will he love you? will you resent it? plus, and this seems shallow, but I think children would be a risky investment too. I'm in a aging population, so maybe its just the clime.

That's not a gamble. That's something a parent and a society has control over. And they're not an investment, they're the future. I don't believe you can justify not having a younger generation just because you're not sure what's going to happen. On the other hand there is still a population explosion in the world (although it's slowing) so maybe it's better that people don't want children. As long as those who have children aren't the kind who just want them as accessories, ways of obtaining benefits or because it's their 'right'.
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Samuel
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« Reply #617 on: March 18, 2009, 02:08:36 pm »

well, I'm pretty sure I'm not what my folks envisioned. A child has it's own brain, so despite what it's taught, It will ultimately, make it's own decisions. you can only do so much. The investment part, IS the future, of the child. You could piss it up against the wall, if your child doesn't use it to the best of their ability. This isn't selfish, really - the child is hypothetical, and doesn't even exist yet. It might be different to you. That's fine.

... how the hell did we get onto children? this is a thread for Single steampunks....Single  S. Punks. Single Spunks! Grin
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Vanessa von Wasserdampf
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« Reply #618 on: March 18, 2009, 02:14:56 pm »

I knew already as a teenager that I did not want children (I don't hate them, I'm just indifferent!). People kept telling me I would change my mind when I was older. Well, I am fast approaching 30 now and still feel the same. I have worked with kids for 3+ years, so I do have some experience with them. And I liked working with them, especially with teenagers! But I never wanted to take any home. Cheesy
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Honeythorn
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« Reply #619 on: March 18, 2009, 06:45:18 pm »

Absolutely none for me. I detest them immensely.
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E.A. Claringbold
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« Reply #620 on: March 18, 2009, 07:43:53 pm »

v Boring mini-babble related to my first reply to the Single Steampunks.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)


---------------------------------------------------

I'd like to have kids, but not for a very long time yet.

Kids are nice. Not now. Not for a long while. But one day (and then we have to get through puberty and all those hormones and the tantrums and the "finding their identity" and the boyfriends/girlfriends and the "I hate you"s and the tears and etc...but what's life without them, right?).

edit: *facepalm* "we" as in those who want to be parents/are parents/are thinking about being parents.
« Last Edit: March 18, 2009, 07:50:28 pm by E.A. Claringbold » Logged
Sk1n
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« Reply #621 on: March 19, 2009, 12:12:55 am »

Hard time quoting on an iphone but about parents wanting the relationships in their own race. She doesn't mean a boy from korea, just one that is full blooded korean. This is not that uncommon with immigrant parents from countries with long traditions. Its the same in a lot of cases with parents from all over like India, Japan, Middle East, even traditional Jewish families in America. I had a friend who moved to Korea and married a girl there. Certain people would go as far as to treat him nice and shun her in the same breath because he didn't make that choice, but she chose to marry a foriegner. I have dated a few different girls of ethnicity and it happens more often than you think.
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« Reply #622 on: March 19, 2009, 08:11:45 am »

i love kids, and i love to hang out with my niece and my nephew, but i dont think i could handle having kids of my own. however i do quite like rowan's idea of a mini apprentice. ive never thought of it that way.
back to whining though, still here, still single and losing hope everyday. after my last relationship which lasted a miserable 2 years, (3 years ago) i decided that was enough for me and havent felt any desire for companionship until recently. now i feel like i really need someone to be with or at least cuddle with...
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« Reply #623 on: March 20, 2009, 02:21:06 am »

Habit, maybe.

I always figured having kids would be a fantastic adventure. A boy and a girl, at the least. Just the same, I have a very hard time seeing myself settled enough to provide well enough for a kid. As mentioned, I suppose it's a matter of finding that right someone.
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« Reply #624 on: March 20, 2009, 03:57:01 am »

That's why engagements ought to be long---make sure it's the right one. Better to break an engagement than break a marriage. Right?
Ahh, but if you keep extending the engagement it probably means you aren't with the right one anyway.
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