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Author Topic: Things that make you go WTF? MkII  (Read 36212 times)
Cora Courcelle
Snr. Officer
****
England England



« Reply #525 on: March 22, 2017, 12:35:41 pm »

The general rule of 'do not mix water and electricity' is easy enough to remember I would have thought.
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You have to tread a fine line between avant-garde surrealism and getting yourself sectioned...
Sir Henry
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United Kingdom United Kingdom


Poking the i's and drinking the t's


« Reply #526 on: March 22, 2017, 08:47:46 pm »

The general rule of 'do not mix water and electricity' is easy enough to remember I would have thought.
He was obviously distracted by being on the phone...
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Cry "Have at!" and let's lick the togs of Waugh!
Arsed not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for tea.
Prof Marvel
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States


learn from history, or be doomed to repeat it


« Reply #527 on: March 23, 2017, 01:19:19 am »

Man dies charging iPhone while in the bath

...
Assistant coroner Dr Sean Cummings, who conducted the inquest at West London Coroner's Court on Wednesday, is to write a prevention of future death report to send to Apple.
....


Apple has replied:
"Dear Citizens who feel this way : please pack up all our products and return them immediately,
 since you are clearly too stupid to be trusted with them. We will provide you with construction paper and crayons by return mail."


for your further Entertainment I offer these Linux "gurus"  and Darwin Award Nominees




from http://www.linuxno.de/gallery_nwl7.php_picId:num,113

yhs
prof grumbles
« Last Edit: March 23, 2017, 01:38:19 am by Prof Marvel » Logged

Your Humble Servant
~~~~~Professor Algernon Horatio Ubiquitous Marvel The First~~~~~~
President, CEO, Chairman,  and Chief Bottle Washer of
Professor Marvel's Traveling Apothecary and Fortune Telling Emporium

Acclaimed By The Crowned Heads of Europe
Purveyor of Patent Remedies, Snake Oil, Cleaning Supplies, Dry Goods, and Picture Postcards
Offering Unwanted Advice for All Occasions and Providing Useless Items to the Gentry
Since 1822
MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"

rtafStElmo
« Reply #528 on: March 23, 2017, 03:32:37 am »

I'm reminded of my Dad's stories about the power line that ran from the main line to his house back in about the late 1940s, when his part of Austin Texas was finally electrified (the house was adjacent to Bergstrom AFB); the line drooped and sagged into the canopy of a cedar tree on the property, which promptly wore the insulation off of the line. It became a favorite activity on wet days for the neighborhood kids to go out and grab the cedar's branches for the shock that was transferred to their bodies. They thought it was fun! This was of course back in the days before Tonka trucks and Nintendo.

Makes me wonder if that's where the DNA for my eccentricity was developed...
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Walk softly and carry a big banjo...

""quid statis aspicientes in infernum"
J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
**
United States United States


Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple


WWW
« Reply #529 on: March 29, 2017, 08:39:06 am »

This is so sad...  Some book sellers, trying to get people to read classic books have turned to "click-baiting"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/39417573/bookshop-turns-classics-into-clickbait-to-get-people-reading


Tweet: "British guy dies after selfie gone wrong"
Link: "The Portrait of Dorian Gray"

Tweet: "Backpacker had the worst trip ever when island tribe attacked him with poop"
Link: "Gulliver's Travels"

Tweet: "Teenage girl tricked boyfriend into killing himself"
Link: "Romeo and Juliet"

Tweet: Stop eating garlic right NOW. Romanian man discovers shocking fact about garlic"
Link: "Bram Stoker's Dracula"  Cheesy
« Last Edit: March 29, 2017, 08:41:27 am by J. Wilhelm » Logged

morozow
Zeppelin Captain
*****
Russian Federation Russian Federation



WWW
« Reply #530 on: March 29, 2017, 09:32:08 am »

This is so sad...  Some book sellers, trying to get people to read classic books have turned to "click-baiting"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/39417573/bookshop-turns-classics-into-clickbait-to-get-people-reading


Tweet: "British guy dies after selfie gone wrong"
Link: "The Portrait of Dorian Gray"

Tweet: "Backpacker had the worst trip ever when island tribe attacked him with poop"
Link: "Gulliver's Travels"

Tweet: "Teenage girl tricked boyfriend into killing himself"
Link: "Romeo and Juliet"

Tweet: Stop eating garlic right NOW. Romanian man discovers shocking fact about garlic"
Link: "Bram Stoker's Dracula"  Cheesy


The novel starts with the scene in bed. The hero finds himself in bed with a muscular tattooed black guy.

Guess?
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Sorry for the errors, rudeness and stupidity. It's not me, this online translator. Really convenient?
walking stick
Zeppelin Admiral
******
England England


« Reply #531 on: March 29, 2017, 11:28:07 am »

This is so sad...  Some book sellers, trying to get people to read classic books have turned to "click-baiting"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/39417573/bookshop-turns-classics-into-clickbait-to-get-people-reading


Tweet: "British guy dies after selfie gone wrong"
Link: "The Portrait of Dorian Gray"

Tweet: "Backpacker had the worst trip ever when island tribe attacked him with poop"
Link: "Gulliver's Travels"

Tweet: "Teenage girl tricked boyfriend into killing himself"
Link: "Romeo and Juliet"

Tweet: Stop eating garlic right NOW. Romanian man discovers shocking fact about garlic"
Link: "Bram Stoker's Dracula"  Cheesy


The novel starts with the scene in bed. The hero finds himself in bed with a muscular tattooed black guy.

Guess?


Moby Dick
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morozow
Zeppelin Captain
*****
Russian Federation Russian Federation



WWW
« Reply #532 on: March 29, 2017, 12:14:38 pm »

Bingo! Did I say that right?

I don't know whether to do it in English. The translator gave me to do and understand. But the Russian had a game of words. We have "scene in bed" = "sex scene".
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von Corax
Squire of the Lambda Calculus
Board Moderator
Immortal
**
Canada Canada

Prof. Darwin Prætorius von Corax


« Reply #533 on: March 29, 2017, 11:16:41 pm »

Bingo! Did I say that right?

I don't know whether to do it in English. The translator gave me to do and understand. But the Russian had a game of words. We have "scene in bed" = "sex scene".

They're usually the same thing in English as well.
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By the power of caffeine do I set my mind in motion
By the Beans of Life do my thoughts acquire speed
My hands acquire a shaking
The shaking becomes a warning
By the power of caffeine do I set my mind in motion
The Leverkusen Institute of Paleocybernetics is 5838 km from Reading
J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
**
United States United States


Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple


WWW
« Reply #534 on: April 02, 2017, 12:40:29 am »

The Biting Pear of Salamanca.  Grin
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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
**
United States United States


Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple


WWW
« Reply #535 on: April 03, 2017, 03:44:06 am »

The anti-sexual harrasment campaign at the Metro underground/subway in Mexico City...

Warning: NSFW seat cushions shown in pictures.   Grin

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-latin-america-39449506



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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
**
United States United States


Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple


WWW
« Reply #536 on: April 09, 2017, 06:54:51 am »

Canada's efforts to conquer the world... with Maple syrup! Mwahahahaha! Actually that is not the WTF issue, but rather, the sensationalised way the BBC wrote this piece:

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-39375257

Quote
UK-based marketing firm Liquid is helping push maple in Britain with "We Love Maple", a multi-pronged campaign geared towards getting the product in kitchens across the country.
The firm's research suggested that older Britons knew little about the product while younger demographics saw it as "something big fat Americans put over pancakes at breakfast", says Elisabeth Lewis-Jones, Liquid's chief executive.


Oh the struggle! The fight for sweet justice! We all root for the underdog, Quebecois Maple! Sugar redemption!  Grin
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SeVeNeVeS
Immortal
**
England England



« Reply #537 on: April 10, 2017, 01:11:16 pm »

So, Virgin Media have been hassling me about my existing router is old and I really need to upgrade to the new Hub3. I finally decided to do it, and guess what, yep, it wont connect.

Now, do I spend 3 hours on the phone trying to sort it, probably with "we need to send an engineer around" or just plug in and use the old one that works just fine?

Why oh why! dont things do what they should these days?

And while I'm in moan mode, I have newish nieghbours and they have rutting sessions, once a fortnight on a Sunday at around 11PM. I REALLY don't want to hear the process and resulting female vocal crescendo to be honest, I have to get up for work at 5AM. Let me sleep in peace for God sake!
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J. Wilhelm
╬ Admiral und Luftschiffengel ╬
Board Moderator
Immortal
**
United States United States


Sentisne fortunatum punkus? Veni. Diem meum comple


WWW
« Reply #538 on: April 11, 2017, 05:23:17 am »


And while I'm in moan mode, I have newish nieghbours and they have rutting sessions, once a fortnight on a Sunday at around 11PM. I REALLY don't want to hear the process and resulting female vocal crescendo to be honest, I have to get up for work at 5AM. Let me sleep in peace for God sake!

So let me get this straight... Once every two weeks? Exactly at 11 pm always on a Sunday night only?  Lucky you, that it's not more often, because one of my roomates would engage in the S&M arts about once every other day with his girlfriend. Same routine, every night. At 7 pm. Same number of paddle slaps. Always the same actions. You could set your clock to their process, until they'd get a shower and finally go to sleep. I endured this for about a year. I never understood why they never changed their routine, even a little bit.  Grin
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Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #539 on: April 11, 2017, 11:29:42 am »

And while I'm in moan mode, I have newish nieghbours and they have rutting sessions, once a fortnight on a Sunday at around 11PM. I REALLY don't want to hear the process and resulting female vocal crescendo to be honest, I have to get up for work at 5AM. Let me sleep in peace for God sake!

11pm Sunday, sounds like a good time to get out your drum-kit or tuba and do a bit of practice.
Especially if it's at a syncopated rhythm...
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Choose a code to live by, die by it if you have to.
Prof Marvel
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States


learn from history, or be doomed to repeat it


« Reply #540 on: April 11, 2017, 10:11:14 pm »

I have newish nieghbours and they have rutting sessions, once a fortnight on a Sunday at around 11PM. I REALLY don't want to hear the process and resulting female vocal crescendo to be honest, I have to get up for work at 5AM. Let me sleep in peace for God sake!

Tape record it.
Set huge speakers in BR facing the wall.
play it back at 5AM when you get up.
turn knob up to " Eleven".

yhs
prof ( just lost all my karma points) marvel
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Clym Angus
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United Kingdom United Kingdom


Lord of Misrule


WWW
« Reply #541 on: April 13, 2017, 08:50:49 pm »

The anti-sexual harrasment campaign at the Metro underground/subway in Mexico City...

Warning: NSFW seat cushions shown in pictures.   Grin

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-latin-america-39449506



I know several people
 (which is not to judge them)
That would look at that seat and think....

Freebe! Cheesy

(I applaud the nature of the more free spirited and rare humanity within a social strata. I love these people for they show me different ways of being. (Upon this they would have a sexual field day.)

I can see the serious point however, Who wants a shag during a morning/evening commute? I certainly don't. But this? It is an interesting way to make a point. One which may lightly backfire.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2017, 08:58:38 pm by Clym Angus » Logged

SeVeNeVeS
Immortal
**
England England



« Reply #542 on: April 17, 2017, 11:02:13 am »

I have newish nieghbours and they have rutting sessions, once a fortnight on a Sunday at around 11PM. I REALLY don't want to hear the process and resulting female vocal crescendo to be honest, I have to get up for work at 5AM. Let me sleep in peace for God sake!


Tape record it.
Set huge speakers in BR facing the wall.
play it back at 5AM when you get up.
turn knob up to " Eleven".

yhs
prof ( just lost all my karma points) marvel
blackfoot-Marauder- Good Morning (streamload).wmv
Played as an alarm should do the trick methinks, rather loud.  Undecided
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Siliconous Skumins
Server Monk
Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #543 on: April 20, 2017, 10:56:42 pm »

So, Virgin Media have been hassling me about my existing router is old and I really need to upgrade to the new Hub3. I finally decided to do it, and guess what, yep, it wont connect.

Now, do I spend 3 hours on the phone trying to sort it, probably with "we need to send an engineer around" or just plug in and use the old one that works just fine?

Why oh why! dont things do what they should these days?



AAAAAANNNNnnnnd this is the reason I have not been around much lately !  Roll Eyes

Same thing - old modem MUST be replaced with the HUB 3 router "Or else!".  The new router arrives a couple of days later, and connects first time with out issue. Great, that was easy!....


*waiting for other shoe to drop*


Oh, now my internet connection is like a tart's knickers - up and down all day long. Roll Eyes
And of course the problem doesn't show up when ringing up the HELLdesk, they just make me do the same stupid actions over and over (STOP READING THE IDIOT CARD AND LISTEN TO ME!!!!). Angry

I know what the problem is, and I could get is sorted *IF* the damned HELLdesk would just transfer me to the network division - it's a simple case of faulty equipment or dirty / corroded interconnects.  The HUB shows that the signal to noise ratio is WAAAYY too high for a stable connection. I've had this issue before.


Oh well, at least I probably won't be the only one with issues, so an engineer will be out to fix it at some point or other. But for now I give up trying to report the problem, only to be instructed how to "reset the hub" each time. Roll Eyes
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[Server Prayer]
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
SeVeNeVeS
Immortal
**
England England



« Reply #544 on: April 28, 2017, 05:27:17 pm »

.
« Last Edit: April 29, 2017, 10:17:55 am by SeVeNeVeS » Logged
morozow
Zeppelin Captain
*****
Russian Federation Russian Federation



WWW
« Reply #545 on: May 02, 2017, 02:32:35 pm »

In Moscow, many years passed acacia "Parade of soap bubbles". Spring, sun, thousands of people, bubbles and hugs.

It's all over now. Sad. Although the occasion had been not the same.

https://fotki.yandex.ru/users/morozow-scald/album/95836/ 2010

https://vk.com/album-695449_156427097 2012



Spoiler (click to show/hide)

How long has it been.
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Drew P
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


« Reply #546 on: May 03, 2017, 12:40:07 pm »

Looks to be pretty long, as that black "ManOwar" shirt could be from the '80s...... Tongue




Hah.......manOwar......what a band......hah....
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Never ask 'Why?'
Always ask 'Why not!?'
morozow
Zeppelin Captain
*****
Russian Federation Russian Federation



WWW
« Reply #547 on: May 03, 2017, 01:41:53 pm »

Well, not so old, the 80's .... Year in 2008 it all began.

I was at 10 and 12. I was then 7 years younger. Ehhhh.

Here professional photo - http://varlamov.ru/553559.html
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SeVeNeVeS
Immortal
**
England England



« Reply #548 on: May 06, 2017, 09:48:53 am »

Qiuck rundown of the situation...... My dad has been in hospital for the last 10 weeks, various problems , spreading cancer etc, this that and the other.....

My the WTF is, alot of people slag off the NHS, I have just found out that a male nurse that works there has been coming in on his only day off and checking in to see how my dad is doing, feeding him and other stuff.

Apparently, the other day my dad said he could use some fresh air, so, he was dressed, plonked in a wheelchair and ferried up to the roof for a view over our fair city, all unpaid.

As far as I am concerned this is above and beyond the call of duty and that man should given some kind of caring award!!

My Giddy God, there are some fantastic people in this world.
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Drew P
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States


« Reply #549 on: May 06, 2017, 01:46:01 pm »

Several gift cards to different better - quality restaurants ^
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