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Author Topic: Dragon Tamers - A room for those of us with anxiety / depression / etc  (Read 48277 times)
Cora Courcelle
Snr. Officer
****
England England



« Reply #1600 on: August 31, 2017, 05:03:07 pm »

*A figure staggers through the door and drops themselves into an armchair in a darkened alcove*

Well, after several years of struggling with my problems, and an occupational health referral I finally went to see my GP and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I was prescribed sertraline and was referred to a counseling service (I'm still waiting to hear back from). After 3 weeks of taking the meds I'm finding that they help me quite a bit, and certainly remove the worst of my anxiety, and have helped keep me on more of an even keel, but I'm not sure if I like what it's doing to me. Not in the way of side effects since I've not had any (other than generally leaving me feeling sleepy) but I've noticed my behaviour changing (and had people comment on it) and I've realised I've become far more uninhibited and am acting in a way I normally wouldn't unless I was quite drunk, and I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with that, particularly given the way the comments about my behaviour have made me feel about it.

I was told that it takes a few weeks for the body to adjust, so perhaps your behaviour will also stabilise.  As for the counselling referral, well just don't hold your breath; my husband waited months and then only got a 6 session course of CBT so you might want to see if there are any self-help groups in your area.  (I know that different areas have different provisions so you may get a much quicker service too).
Logged

You have to tread a fine line between avant-garde surrealism and getting yourself sectioned...
rovingjack
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States



WWW
« Reply #1601 on: October 02, 2017, 04:56:40 pm »

I stumble in shivering from the near freezing weather we've had recently, which was proceded by a heat wave.

I've not had enough sleep in the last few days, due to the scheduling of things I have to attend, and sleeping being so harsh in near freezing weather inside a car.

I should be excited about lining up a seasonal job, getting training on a large metal lathe, and starting some projects. But at the same time the cold, disrupted sleep, poor diet, changes in my weight, strange smells in the car and my family issues have me in a mood of feeling hopeless.

I got a message from my mother yesterday, and frankly it's a part of why my mood has soured.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
The last time I talked with her, she asked me what I was eating and if I was showering regularly. Sorry, but you don't gt to dismiss me when I'm trying to control the nose dive my life was in, only to back seat drive when I manage to narrowly avoid a crash.

But now she sends her message, somehow making it somehow about her. And I just don't have the energy to deal with it right now. But if I just ignore it, it means abandoning all family ties. I'm not quite ready to do that yet.

I need to focus on establishing a little stability in my life, and then wrangling some of the remaining chaos into an adventure that brings something posative into my life. and my mother and the whole mess involved there are a drain on my energy and ability to do so.
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Cora Courcelle
Snr. Officer
****
England England



« Reply #1602 on: October 23, 2017, 08:51:24 pm »

I have come in here because I am tired and stressed.
My mother-in-law is quite poorly and will not be with us for very much longer - she is 92 so this is only to be expected but ... she has always been fairly high maintenance but now every time we go to see her (four or five times a week usually for at least a couple of hours each visit, which is a twenty mile trip) she is refusing to do anything.  Ask her a question and she doesn't answer, just stares into space for minutes before making some vague reply, make her whatever she wants to eat and she just pushes it around the plate as if she has forgotten how to use cutlery, help her to get into her wheelchair and she screams as if we are murdering her.
Now before you condemn me as a hard-hearted bitch ("What do you expect at her age etc") she has carers going in to look after her 4 times a day and she chats with them, eats the food they give her (not much but she does eat, and stands to transfer chairs with their assistance  without a murmur.  (We have been outside and seen how she changes); I have worked with the elderly for decades and often seen how suddenly people become 'dependent' when family appear so I am not surprised at this but my husband, the only child, is so stressed and depressed that it is breaking my heart; he also has long-term health problems and although I do as much as possible it's always been him who she expects to do everything for her.
We are going on a much needed holiday for a whole week, having had to cancel one earlier this year because she was too poorly to be left but last time we were away for longer than one night she was ill and ended up in hospital.  Thank heavens for her wonderful carers who have said "Go, we'll look after her, you really need a break".

So wish me luck.  Thanks for listening.
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Miranda.T
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #1603 on: October 24, 2017, 10:21:04 am »

Dear Cora,
I've just send the pm and then looked at this, to put the pm into context. Yes, there is such a tumult of emotions as you see a loved one slipping away. I suppose I was 'lucky' in that my mother was very near by for visiting and she was lucid until the last couple of days. I'm an only child too, so I know how that responsibility feels. Despite all the difficulties, you know you are doing your best for her and your husband should console himself by knowing he's there for her in moments of need; so many people just abandon their elderly relatives in their later years, whereas you are making the time to see her as much as possible. One can but hope she will start to appreciate what you are doing for her and begin to make the best of what time is left.

Thinking of you,

Yours,
Miranda.
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Rose Inverness
Snr. Officer
****
United States United States


Communing with the Over-soul via you.


WWW
« Reply #1604 on: October 26, 2017, 12:07:18 am »

Rovingjack,

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. I wish you the very best and that your situation improves massively. Maybe try to focus on positive things right now, as a strategy for getting through this time? I find that to be a helpful tool, myself. Seek out all the positivity you can find. Make it a hobby, a mission.

Blessings to you.


Dear Cora,

I have wished for awhile now to come back and thank you for the encouragement you gave me (some time ago) regarding getting married and my wedding dress, but especially the encouragement for my husband and I to be there for one another and LAUGH together.

So I wish you Much laughter of the good wholesome kind which makes one's soul feel good!

  Smiley

In other news, I was told not long ago that I really needed a break, to 'get away' from things (I was ill all summer, in Denmark... with several hospital visits and even more doctor's visits and no conclusive diagnosis). My husband had been quite stressed, especially because of taking care of me and of his father who had Parkinson's for 34 years. So, I got on the plane and went to the US to see my friends and family and be cozy in my family home for a couple months, eat some good food, enjoy the holidays that exist here like nowhere else.

And on day 3 or 4 of my trip, my father-in-law passed away. Peacefully in his sleep, so that's a good point. He's done suffering from his illness. My husband wants me to just stay put. I had always thought I'd be with him at the funeral to be supportive. Also I would like to be able to be there in general to cook for him to make sure he eats.

I feel basically fine. Just checking-in since it's been so long since I can remember coming in here.

Warmly,
Mme. Rose


I have come in here because I am tired and stressed.
My mother-in-law is quite poorly and will not be with us for very much longer - she is 92 so this is only to be expected but ... she has always been fairly high maintenance but now every time we go to see her (four or five times a week usually for at least a couple of hours each visit, which is a twenty mile trip) she is refusing to do anything.  Ask her a question and she doesn't answer, just stares into space for minutes before making some vague reply, make her whatever she wants to eat and she just pushes it around the plate as if she has forgotten how to use cutlery, help her to get into her wheelchair and she screams as if we are murdering her.
Now before you condemn me as a hard-hearted bitch ("What do you expect at her age etc") she has carers going in to look after her 4 times a day and she chats with them, eats the food they give her (not much but she does eat, and stands to transfer chairs with their assistance  without a murmur.  (We have been outside and seen how she changes); I have worked with the elderly for decades and often seen how suddenly people become 'dependent' when family appear so I am not surprised at this but my husband, the only child, is so stressed and depressed that it is breaking my heart; he also has long-term health problems and although I do as much as possible it's always been him who she expects to do everything for her.
We are going on a much needed holiday for a whole week, having had to cancel one earlier this year because she was too poorly to be left but last time we were away for longer than one night she was ill and ended up in hospital.  Thank heavens for her wonderful carers who have said "Go, we'll look after her, you really need a break".

So wish me luck.  Thanks for listening.

Logged

That delicate forest flower,   
With scented breath and look so like a smile,   
Seems, as it issues from the shapeless mould,   
An emanation of the indwelling Life,   
A visible token of the upholding Love,   
That are the soul of this great universe.

~William Cullen Bryant

Trains to Steamtown, this way...
rovingjack
Zeppelin Admiral
******
United States United States



WWW
« Reply #1605 on: November 15, 2017, 08:09:08 am »

I'm still hashing out the details but I shall have myself a grand adventure.

I will start at a friends New Years party, and depart from the festivities into the new year by traveling into Maine on the first to meet with makers at a makerspace and record creative people talking about their creative projects, and some B-roll footage. Also maybe compile some additional footage for a documentary in the future. The next day some scenic views and travel vlogging, and maybe connecting with any youtubers in the area.

The next two days are a repeat of that in New Hampshire, then Two days in a Mass city.

The a quick run to a location for a multi makerspace cardboard sled building challenge. Then back out for two day stints in  twenty other cities along the east coast and south.

Spend a month in the warmth of California before departing back for my journey to 12 more makerspaces one row of states up from the ones I passed through already. Getting back to my currant location by early april. I might visit some of eastern canada for some of the warmer months and work political canvassing while joining back with the local makerspace to teach classes and work on projects.

Then the post office again in late autumn through to new years. Then back out to capture the last of the continental US states, gathering the rest of canadian provinces and territories on my way to alaska in the heat of the summer. return for the post office and the final new years before I head out to visit mexico and then Hawaii before attending Vidcon and Bay Area Makers Faire. Which hopefully marks the start of my grander adventure:

Makerspaces and Youtube spaces in- Sau paulo and Rio
Makerspace, youtubespace, olympics, and maker faire in Japan
Makerspace, and youtube space in Mumbai, Dubai, Berlin, Paris, London and Toronto before returning to the US in time to Get to the NYC Youtube space and The world Makers Faire in the bronx childrens Science museum.

I might start another journey the next year to visit a few other locations but I also want to get back to Dubai to check out the World Expo.

I'm practicing a little bit of alchemy here and transmuting homelessness into travel adventure. after all, if I have no port to call home then I have a whole world I can explore without neglecting my home, and in my own words, "If it's about the journey and not the destination, there is no such thing as lost."

I keep having moments where I realise that I'm actually going to do this. I'm going to visit all 50 US states and 9 other countries, meeting new people, learning new languages and seeing new things, and sharing the adventure with anybody in the world who wishes to follow it online. While creating two or three documentary films.

And past that point is a singularity. It marks a point in my life where I will have been so changed by my experiences that I have no idea what I will want or be able to achieve after that.

All this from having my home taken from me and being left out in the cold by friends and family.
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Banfili
Zeppelin Captain
*****
Australia Australia



« Reply #1606 on: November 15, 2017, 12:51:43 pm »

Good for you, rovingjack!
Just remember to keep in touch - no photos, it didn't happen!! Grin
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