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Author Topic: Ask a Villain. (interactive writing project)  (Read 34266 times)
Koenig
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« Reply #25 on: March 09, 2013, 12:44:46 am »

Lawyers are a tricky bunch to have as an ally...Even an evil genius such as myself is but a innocent child compared many of their ilk! How do you work with them without fear of being stabbed in the back (Or shot with a Tesla rifle)?
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Stella Gaslight
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« Reply #26 on: March 09, 2013, 03:37:11 am »

I find a three pronged method works well for keeping them under control.

First have something on him murder,bribery that sort of thing. If they don't have a dark secret for you to blackmail them over arrange for something to give them a skeleton in the closet.(sometimes a literal one works best.)

Second pay them well but not well enough to think they can do without you.  It takes a bit of trial and error but it is well worth it.

Third is an exploding belt and knowledge you have the detonator on you at all times. Nothing like a good old fashioned death threat to make people more reasonable. Do make sure you have it rigged to blow when you die tho otherwise their may be messy complications.
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Lazaras
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Have Wierd; Will Travel.


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« Reply #27 on: March 09, 2013, 05:49:25 pm »

Exploding belt is so very curde though. Also you have to plan wardrobe around the explosives. Sure some measure of control is needed but one mustn't be uncivilized about such things. Plus having a few 'gifts' of freshly talored suits always helps. Even better when you let the exact design be between the giftee and the tailor as that gives them some measure of choice while you still hold the cards.


That's the key thing. Let your underlings have some degree of freedom, but not so much that they will ruin anything you have in mind. Keeps them happy and thinking they have all they want, which in turn makes them better workers for your cause.

'but if you're so good at minion control why haven't you conquered the world yet?'

An overabundance of evil or otherwise selfish villainy has crowded out the top positions already and I'm quite sure we all know how hard it is to climb the ladder when the person at top is chucking things at your head. Still. Evil Lair is well secured and I have a modest enough power base as a fallback. That's also important. If you get knocked down have at least one lair. One bolt hole. One place that is Yours. DO NOT MAKE THIS THE SAME LOCATION YOU ARE CARRYING YOUR PLANS OUT FROM.

Sure commuting to work is a pain and it is ever so tempting to have 'work at home' be another reason to take up the lifestyle. However when your latest mind control/death/kitten/cheese ray has blown up and the place is literally falling apart around your ears it's best to have 'home' not go up in flames along with.

Plus heroic types bursting through your kitchen skylight in the middle of dinner is dreadfully inconvenient.


Anyone else have any advice to share on lair management  Granted eventually we'll all be at eachother's throats, but where possible don't attack a person in their own home, especially without some sort of foreknowledge or warning. There's Evil and then ther'es just being plain uncivil. I want to rule the world to make it better, so shant resort to pure barbarism.
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Cheapie Theatre
Want something to read? Got ten minutes to kill? Here you go!
Koenig
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United States United States



« Reply #28 on: March 09, 2013, 07:00:12 pm »

Assuming you know that a hero type (or group thereof) are coming to crash your laboratory, what kind of preparations do you usually make?
It is important to keep your equipment safe, but at the same time I find it equally if not more important to put on a good show. The last time I knew someone was coming (I knew 400 years in advance thanks to time travel) I set up an entire automated orchestra and pipe organ for there arrival. Suffice to say, they were both surprised and even more convinced that I was a mad genius. The fact the half of this equipment went up in smoke in the following battle is...aside the point, Though perhaps I should focus more on the traps next time?
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Stella Gaslight
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« Reply #29 on: March 09, 2013, 07:54:53 pm »

I am working in an implant version of the belt but right now it makes an unsightly lump. I find as a female villain you have to use a bit more force when braking in a new minion than my male counterparts or people don't take you seriously. Tho blasting anyone that calls me darling, dear or sweetheart is helping on that front.

I learned a lot about lair management when I started.  There were smuggling caves in the next town over and it was a common place for young villains to use for their first lair. I took over the entire system but instead of going for expensive add ons I saved up my spoils and funded the building of a second lair and then a third that way when a plucky young troop of heroes came for me and I had to collapse a few tunnels I had a ready made place to move in to.  I still keep an eye on it tho.  You never forget your first lair.

I have found that the best lairs are fire and water proof and have their own power system.  I am even experimenting on having my own food supply minion chow gets expensive after all.  Volcano lairs are nice but remember to vastly overbuild them. It is very embarrassing to have nature take you down where heroes have failed.  I also have a split empire I keep my business dealings separate from my more blatantly criminal activities. That way I don't have to worry about having all my eggs in one basket and I don't have minions interrupting my important meetings. Underlings in nether empire know where I live and I use a mute coachman when the need pops up.  And when a hero destroys your lair consider rebuilding not to move back in to but to sell to a lesser Villain.  It nets you funds, make some allies you can use to your own advantage and gives you a buffer when the hero comes after you again.

Koenig that sounds delightful. I like to make sure and have duplicates of anything important sealed away and then have fun.  I like playing trap dominos, leaving one more easy to see and another where you would go to avoid that.  My best combo is eight I am thinking of making a more formalised sport of it because it is so vastly amusing.  Also never underestimate the power of miss-labelling everything. Sure you have to train your minions a little more but it is very funny when heroes end up in your incinerator instead of your temporal lab,
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Lazaras
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« Reply #30 on: March 10, 2013, 05:40:59 am »

I have known in advance precisely twice that I'd be interrupted.

First time I was overseeing an undersea project. Lost city of.. Well whatever. Point is lost technology in deep ocean. I had the whole naudicle theme going. Sharks trained as hunters. A pet octopus that was modified to walk on land and breath air for short bursts. Even had one of my lovely lovely minions turned into a merfolk so she could be my prime negotiator to the local under sea empire.

Never NEVER under-estimate the good sense of treating the locals fairly. Especially if they still are capable of wreckin your plans (even if only by being a distraction.) I'll explain why in a minute. Thanks to the remoteness of the location and foresight of havin drones patrolling the waters I knew I'd be invaded. Picked off most of the invadors en route (not all that hard when all you need to do is cause a tiny crack and let water pressure do the hard work.) It was down to a small band, naturally of their leader and his cohorts. My ladyfriend had.... Yea. when one of your opponents is a master of seduction these things happen. Unfortunately while the lady is still in my employ I've had to revoke her clearances. Damnit I cared about her you bloody ungrateful shortsight-

*ten minutes later*

-halfwitted excuse of a spy. Anyway They breeched my defenses through the moon pool network I had for the merfolk delegates. However foresight and having a plan even for my lady's betrayal let me have a nice little spread waiting for them. My pet octopus at a pipe organ playing a suitably ominous work while I gave a nice Challenge speech. All to buy time for my minions to do an off site backup of everything and remove what treasures and artifacts i deemed worth saving. Sure it's fun on it's own, but it's bad form to indulge in theatrics unless there's a purpose.

Gone was Commodore Depthcharge. That persona died in the vastly deep supposedly swallowed by a gigantic cephilapod. I miss that lair. Had ta with James Cameron in there. Nice fellow. Hated having to wipe his mind but while i'm sure we all have museums of curiosities I say that man's research is too valuable to simply horde him away.... for now. He puts out another Avatar movie and I lock him away for the good of everyone's sanity.


The second time?

It was when I was feeling nostalgic about my first dedicated lair. Apparently one of my earlier nemesis(nemesi? Blast what's the plural for that word?) was also feeling nostalgic. Wonderful talented insightful lady. Pity she and I had to break things off because she's in thrall of some government or other. We danced. Dined, fought... though I'm not sure if it was fighting so much as flirting. Ended up on a mad chase through the city after using the escape tubes as a fun slide of happy doom while pistol dueling the whole way. I am grateful she left the place intact. As i said it was my first and while not functional as a headquarters it does serve well as a meeting place of sorts.
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Koenig
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« Reply #31 on: March 10, 2013, 06:44:29 am »

Is it worth being an evil genius without a hero type nemesis to counter-act your actions? In many ways they are the only people who tend to grasp the gravity of what I have planned. Granted, I would be able to get more done without him him/her/ and the rest of them mucking up my plans.
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Stella Gaslight
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Looking for a few good lobsters.


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« Reply #32 on: March 10, 2013, 07:05:03 am »

That is just the thing.  I don't entirely know if we can live without heroes.  Raw villainy itself seems to be a vacuum nature abhors and must create an opposite.  That is why I keep a few low level bumbling ones around.  If you don't the more wickedly smart or powerful ones seem to spring out of nowhere at just the wrong time.  I like having a few small time heroes I can manipulate because they are both a useful tool and mainly harmless.
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Koenig
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United States United States



« Reply #33 on: March 10, 2013, 07:38:27 am »

I see your point. Though have also found myself getting into an odd friendship with some of them (Some of them hate me with every fiber of their being, but that is aside the point) In fact I even secretly replaced the church organist (He woke up at home with a nasty hangover the next day) in order to attend one of my arch nemesis weddings, to this day they still do not relies that I was there. Good times, good times...
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Stella Gaslight
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« Reply #34 on: March 10, 2013, 08:33:21 am »

I think there is something in us that calls to them and visa versa. That reminds me of my first hero.  He led a rag tag news boy brigade and he found me when this was all still a thing I dabbled in on vacations from finishing school.  We had some exhausting fights that ended in both of us panting and more than a few times where we could have killed each other but didn't.  It was one hell of a time to be alive.  Once when we were both drunk he confessed I reminded him of his sister who didn't make it to 10. You never forget your first.  He fell for one of my minions and I made sure that she was guarding him while I was away working on a very grand plan that was spoiled by pigs.  I got a letter last spring apparently I am godmother to a bouncing baby boy.
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Lazaras
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« Reply #35 on: March 10, 2013, 04:04:16 pm »

I see your point. Though have also found myself getting into an odd friendship with some of them (Some of them hate me with every fiber of their being, but that is aside the point) In fact I even secretly replaced the church organist (He woke up at home with a nasty hangover the next day) in order to attend one of my arch nemesis weddings, to this day they still do not relies that I was there. Good times, good times...

Sounds likea story worth a few rounds. Sure a few I genuinely have Done Things to with little regret or reguard (see also that layabout spy that seduced my henchwoman from under the sea.) Others. It is strange. Then again there is a school of thought that suggests the extremes of emotion lay close to eachother. Besides how better to up your own efforts and assess weakness than to have your plans put to the test?

Plus it's always fun when you can point them at a rival and have the work done for you. Speaking of. I apologize to whoever wanted to send the clone supersoldier army back to the 1940's but really. Replacing the german government? There's villainry and then there's pure stupidity. Yes you might have been hailed as a hero for deposing them but you'd have to hope the rest of the world, already united, wouldn't catch wind of what your ambitions were.
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pakled
Zeppelin Captain
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United States United States


Minions Local 305, at your thervice!


« Reply #36 on: March 10, 2013, 08:22:59 pm »

I have one; about monologs; how much is enough? I know it's oh so tempting to explain all the facets of your nefarious enterprise, but invariably those pesky heroes spot the single flaw and bring the whole thing crashing about one's ears. There's a part that wants them to spot the flaw so it can be corrected, but they never want to 'join up' due to irrelevant details like scruples or principles...

How far should one go to get the adulation/revulsion from your nemesis without endangering the whole enterprise? I don't want things to go pear-shaped just because of ego (but then, without ego, where's the fun in being a villain?...Wink
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Stella Gaslight
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« Reply #37 on: March 10, 2013, 08:48:25 pm »

I find it helps to rehearse with a minion tied to a chair, not harshly unless they have displeased you, to be used as a hero analogue. When they start to wiggle then it is time to bring things to a close.  Remember to change who this minion is regularly otherwise they get used to your speaking habits and can give false positives.  Also offering the minions cake seams to work quite well for drumming up volunteers for some reason.
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Koenig
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« Reply #38 on: March 10, 2013, 09:15:05 pm »

Also offering the minions cake seams to work quite well for drumming up volunteers for some reason.
Indeed. Positive motivators are not limited to AI's with a testing complex. In fact, the most successful integrator in history often opted to giving his "Victims" rewards rather than inflicting pain. I digress however, there are still times when force may be necessary.

On a more personal note: Have you ever found yourself creating, and thereafter falling in love with a custom weapon or tool? I don't know where I would be without my Anti-Newtonian Revolver or my Harmonic Rapier.
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Stella Gaslight
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Looking for a few good lobsters.


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« Reply #39 on: March 10, 2013, 09:56:32 pm »

Oh goodness yes.  My first death ray was a lovely thing all sleek in green and black. It had it's quirks, it was a long charger and tended to make my hair stand on end but I loved it. I lost mark 1 in a particularly harry escape from a volcano but mark 4 is doing fine and is the prize of my arsenal.  I have even adopted it's colour scheme so we always match.
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Lazaras
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« Reply #40 on: March 11, 2013, 12:06:32 am »

On a more personal note: Have you ever found yourself creating, and thereafter falling in love with a custom weapon or tool? I don't know where I would be without my Anti-Newtonian Revolver or my Harmonic Rapier.

Well it is all part of developing a signature style is it not?  Also when you have one of our own elect to use something far less theatrical or obscure in favor of just shooting the fellow in the head it's a good bit of 'oh crud we crossed a line with this one.'

Find those rare moments, and they must be rare, are effective. The game is quite fun even with repeted setbacks, but when lines get crossed a clear 'I'm done being nice' is good to have. Personally there's this particle accelerator rifle I'm quite fond of, have been since the sea dome incident really. Took my usual heroic gallary several iterations to figure out the weapon wasn't just something being passed around and it was me each and every time. Made even more fun when they found out when I was legally untouchable to them.

As for Monologing I find the aforementioned volunteer minion good. Goes doubly well when you pick a minion you know is good at escaping so ask them, at the point of you stopping, how long they've been free. And do reward that minion (if they actually volunteered) Reward them for being prompt with escape, being subtle about the escape (if I'm too wrapped up in talking to notice then I've work to do on my end.)

Had a thought. What's to keep one or mor of our own personal nemesi from just shoulder browsing?
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Stella Gaslight
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Looking for a few good lobsters.


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« Reply #41 on: March 11, 2013, 07:29:52 am »

I never tell anyone my full plans and often have two or more running at once. It takes more effort to keep going but it quite satisfying.  That way if something goes wrong with one I can gracefully roll in to the next one. Hell I like makeing red herring plots just to mess with the heroes but I do try to make them functional as well just in case they aren't detected.
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Koenig
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« Reply #42 on: March 11, 2013, 08:04:50 am »

In general, what devices do the hero types usually use that foils your plans? While it ultimately comes down to the skill and intelligence of the user, I have found that a properly equipped enemy is simply far more likely to successfully interfere with my plans. (For this reason, former Boyscouts seem to make much more dangerous opponents as they take the idea of being prepared to hear...It can be downright infuriating at times) In fact, I have put my "Master Plan" on hiatus until I am 100% certain that my nemesis and cohorts lack the resources to undue all my hard work.
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Stella Gaslight
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Looking for a few good lobsters.


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« Reply #43 on: March 11, 2013, 03:31:16 pm »

The surprising thing is they have used everything from a truck full of pigs to a pocket knife to bring down my plans. I have gotten a lot of seemingly blessed bumblers that push just the wrong thing at the right time.  Normal heroes I can trap in a very typical way but the bumblers keep getting around the traps I have set for them.
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pakled
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States


Minions Local 305, at your thervice!


« Reply #44 on: March 12, 2013, 03:58:21 am »

It always seems to include office supplies; pens with lasers in them (no sharks...Wink paper clips, Swiss Army Knives (one particularly inventive Scot, who later turned up in a secret Air Force adventuring group that traveled around the Universe...no, never mind...Wink
Gullible guards, clueless minions, easily-turned arm candy...the mind despairs at times...Wink
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Lazaras
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« Reply #45 on: March 12, 2013, 05:17:58 am »

Most embarassing defeat.


...involved a truckload of gumballs. Mice. Somke charges attached to said mice. and my network's AI turning against me after being uploaded into a fembot shell and made off with.... Yea.

On the up side I think she's doing quite well and has gained full rights as a person. What? It's not the most traditional way to leave a company but I happened to LIKE her. Even have an updated version running things while I'm away.


Yes I figured out why the original turned on me and patched that out. What i"m not a complete moron.
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Mrs. Hobbs
Gunner
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United States United States



« Reply #46 on: March 12, 2013, 06:45:50 am »

If I may, what inspires you to achieve your full villainous potential? What advice would you give a budding villain?
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Stella Gaslight
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« Reply #47 on: March 12, 2013, 05:08:06 pm »

The thing that realy lights my fire is my first major defeat.  I was fighting a tough bastard of a hero and had my trusted right hand man looking over my busness empire.  Little did I know he had a foraged marrage licence and was planning to devorce me and take half of my empire.  That was a very messy time but whenever I am discoraged I rember that and think never again. Don't ne afraid to plan huge evev if youare new.   If you.fail do it with style and you can't heelp but leave a good. Impression.
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Fairley B. Strange
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« Reply #48 on: March 12, 2013, 05:32:40 pm »

Really I think a truly great villian is inspired by the unwavering mindless loyalty of his minions.

I mean, consider Eric, Minion number 437, slaving away seven shifts a week in the core of the Gravitic Anomaliser - all for the simple promise that when I an Evil Overlord of All (tm), he shall have a faint chance to be Junior Despot over Western Iceland.

With faithful minions like that, even when my plans are thwarted and all despaired, what I can but do except go forth and rebuild my lair anew?
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Choose a code to live by, die by it if you have to.
pakled
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United States United States


Minions Local 305, at your thervice!


« Reply #49 on: March 15, 2013, 04:57:02 am »

...and so much of it concerns destruction vs construction! Imagine, while the goody-two-shoes bemoan the end of the world as we know it, I'm working for a better world...my world...Wink Incidentally, it does tick one off about 'the end of the world as we know it'...it's always the end of the world as we know it! If the world was always as we know it, it would be a static...sorry, monologing again...Wink

Sometimes you have to destroy a world in order to save it...
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