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Author Topic: >The Smoking Room< The Second Storey  (Read 39691 times)
Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #800 on: August 06, 2013, 12:56:55 pm »

*checks that the bird is now de-armed, then resumes his task at the taps passing out a bevy of tankards*

(mutters to himself) Sometimes a dodo with no body is better than a raygun...

Well, drink up, Ladies and Gents, and try not to think of the bar running dry just yet. As to what next, I suppose we could check whats behind the door in the tree. Bitter experience indicates its bound to be something we could later regard as 'interesting', or we could try going further west.

Logged

Choose a code to live by, die by it if you have to.
Alexis Voltaire
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


Shàlle We Dànce?


« Reply #801 on: August 07, 2013, 12:56:55 am »

*Alexis has turned off the wing-shield device and put it back in her coat, and is currently taking sips of peach brandy from a Klein bottle made of purple glass. she is a little troubled by a tinny sound of ringing silver bells that keeps filtering through her brain, fading in and out like a out of tune radio channel. (Which is more or less what it is, supernaturally speaking)*

Bloody hell of a time for this thing to act up... *She mutters, taking another sip and watching the others, while one hand digs through her coat pocket. She gives up after a while and turns to the Gibbous, who is sorting through a bowl of barfood, picking out all the broken pretzels.*

Would you mind fetching the neural manipulator for me, please? I can't reach it from here and I don't want to risk a trip in there right now...

*The gibbous meeps, and picks out the last few pretzel fragments before engulfing the bowl and the snack it contains. Alexis holds out a hand and the Gibbous oozes down it and into her pocket. A short time later it pulls out what looks like a large colander covered in wires and circuitry.*

Oh, and you brought the reader too, thanks. *Alexis puts the bowl-shaped device over her head and hooks a small numeric readout to an auxiliary jack. She looks down as the Gibbous tugs at her coatsleeve, and takes a black postcard with purple lettering that reads 'Sagittarius A* - Sucks to be Here'. She flips it over and stares at the odd geometric writing on the back while she strokes the Gibbous with one finger.*

Thanks, but I can't read... Oh, you mean that. *The gibbous makes a nodding motion* Well, just for a minute. *She takes a large drink of brandy, then sets the Klein bottle down and taps in a few numbers on the reader device.* This had better not stick or I'm really going to regret decorating in tiger print.

*She taps the enter key and winces, and the orangey-brown interior of the pub suddenly takes on a staticky-brown look. Alexis shuts her eyes and shakes her head, then opens them again and reads the back of the postcard.*

Oh, hey! forgot I even had this! Here Bailey, might interest you *She hands the postcard over* it's directions to the tailors at Altchoral market. They'll do anything there, not too expensive either if you can get a few pounds of raw aluminum. Just keep in mind that they take directions very literally, hence why I own a small storage universe in my coat pocket. Wish I could get back there and get this thing fixed, but the Lord Marshall's daughter and I had some... disagreements last time through.
Logged

~-- Purveyour of Useless Facts, Strange Advice, Plots --~
Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #802 on: August 07, 2013, 11:24:35 am »

*regards the colander on her head with slightly more than his usual bemusement*

Raw aluminum..? Is that the stuff they make aluminium out of? Well, with Bailey's ripped clothes, and Philip's damage from falling out of the tree, a decent tailor might be a good idea, but we'd need to find some....

*thinks briefly as he regards the departing flying-arms*

Hmmm, those handy-chaps were some kind of shiny lightweight metal... and they're all going that way with their tips and beer...
Logged
Alexis Voltaire
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


Shàlle We Dànce?


« Reply #803 on: August 08, 2013, 02:00:50 am »

Well, the stuff they accepted was just unshaped refined aluminum, but I think they'd accept bauxite too. Seems it's a bit fiddly to get aluminum in that dimension, for whatever reason. *Alexis says, fiddling with a few knobs on the colander mechanism, and watching numbers and symbols flip through the handheld reader.*

Hey, what's this? Latent mental programming type 1=false... huh, let's see. *she types a few buttons and hits the enter key. A knowing look comes over her face, and she aims two fingers at a pewter mug sitting at an empty place in the bar. A thin bolt of electricity snaps between her fingers and the mug.*

Neat... Wish I'd've found that a week ago. *She mutters, typing a few more buttons and holding one down while swirly symbols flip across the reader. *

This looks a bit odd, I know, but it's rather important that I fix this now or we may have some rather unwelcome visitors. *She taps in a few numbers and the sounds of bells and hoofbeats distorts into a screech of feedback that makes her wince and set her teeth, but it fades.*

I was shanghaied into robbing an Aquillian armored cruiser a few years back. Had to work alone, but my employers wanted to make sure I wouldn't skip town once they let me loose, so I ended up with a bunch of half-magical logic circuits in my head... Love to get it removed, but I'm told it's a bit difficult to do without triggering a dimensional rift that would cause all the matter within a few spherical miles to bleed into the Void...

*She taps a few keys, and her vision returns to normal.* It's pretty harmless right now, I disabled the trigger a long time ago, but every so often it acts up and the wireless system tunes into some unpleasant things. Especially when jumping dimensions without proper containment.

*She unplugs the reader and sighs, rubbing her eyes and taking another sip of brandy. Meanwhile, the Gibbous is oozing sideways across the wall and investigating the dartboard.*
« Last Edit: August 08, 2013, 02:05:09 am by Alexis Voltaire » Logged
Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #804 on: August 13, 2013, 01:02:23 pm »

*pulls another tankard from the taps*


Oh great! Which one of you lot started thinking about used dishwater? Now we really do need to find a way out of here.
Logged
Siliconous Skumins
Server Monk
Governor
Rogue Ætherlord
****
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #805 on: August 13, 2013, 10:35:34 pm »

Dishwater?...
Oh - sorry, my fault. I was just reading the beer list, they serve "Organic Home-brewed Lager"....


*Dodo and Gibbous are now playing darts, Gibbous is winning - much to the dodo's annoyance*

Come on you two, wrap it up, we're about get moving again.

SS
Logged

[Server Prayer]
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"

rtafStElmo
« Reply #806 on: August 16, 2013, 01:21:54 am »

*accepts the card*

Why, thank you.

*pockets it, and spreads his left wing, uses the steel pinions to cut a joint of meat off of some kind of roasted beast that shows up on the table next to him*

Roast...er... whatzit, anybody? *takes a bite* MMm, tastes like pork.

*eyes the dodo and the gibbous*

I wish I had pet--! Uh-oh...

*A small batwinged black-and-white cat with black spots from the white neckline down to the snowy midbelly suddenly POPs into being and walks across teh table to jump up and settle herself comfortably on MW's shoulder*

Er... Hello, there... can I call you Buttons, perhaps?

Meoww...Purrrrr...

*wisps of smoke curl out of Buttons' mouth as she snuggles up against MWs neck*

I'll take that as a yes, then?

*Buttons takes a bite of the proferred joint of meat and chews it thoughtfully, then opens her mouth and flames a passing gadfly to cinders*

*My, my, a cute li'l firebreather, aren't you, Buttons dear...
Logged

Walk softly and carry a big banjo...

""quid statis aspicientes in infernum"
Philip
Gunner
**
United States United States


If you can not be good, be good at it.


« Reply #807 on: August 18, 2013, 07:32:16 am »

* downs his pint, and slams empty tankard on the bar* Ready to go when you are., he says to all.
Logged

Have gone to find myself, if I should return, please ask me to wait.
Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #808 on: October 10, 2013, 01:03:21 pm »

*wakes in a sodden heap, stretches, and sniffs suspiciously around him*

Hmmm, why does everything smell like used dishwater? Normally this part of the gutter smells like two types of beer - stale and second-hand...

*scratches his unruly hair*

Well, somehow I'm back outside the Smoking Room... Hello? Anybody in..? Is the bar open - for a proper beer this time! I guess that organic beer rubbish really does bring everybody down to earth...
Logged
Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
**
United Kingdom United Kingdom


09madasafish
« Reply #809 on: October 10, 2013, 01:09:14 pm »

Afternoon all. I miss anything interesting in the past 30-odd pages?
Logged

I made a note in my diary on the way over here. Simply says; "Bugger!"

"DON'T THINK OF IT AS DYING, JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH."
Heckler
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #810 on: October 10, 2013, 02:22:02 pm »

*Leans out from heavily camoflaged hide in corner of room clutching clockwork camera*

If you have, I can offer very reasonably priced montages of the best bits, if you know what I mean sir *wink wink*.

*Disappears back inside hide, whirr of clock work camera resumes*
Logged

We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.
H.P. Lovecraft
"The Call of Cthulhu"
Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
**
United Kingdom United Kingdom


09madasafish
« Reply #811 on: October 10, 2013, 03:27:08 pm »

*Leans out from heavily camoflaged hide in corner of room clutching clockwork camera*

If you have, I can offer very reasonably priced montages of the best bits, if you know what I mean sir *wink wink*.

*Disappears back inside hide, whirr of clock work camera resumes*

*Opens flap in Hide*

That is a tempting offer Sir. Is there any material included in said montages suitable for using in blackmail opportunities?
Logged
Heckler
Zeppelin Captain
*****
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #812 on: October 10, 2013, 04:56:06 pm »

*shuffles uncomfortably*

Ahem, well blackmail is such a dirty dirty word, not as dirty as the one I just thought of, but dirty none the less.  Of course sir is clearly such a connoisseur of such material that he would treat it with the discretion it deserved.

To you sir three for a pound.....

Now take your hand off my flaps.

Logged
Siliconous Skumins
Server Monk
Governor
Rogue Ætherlord
****
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #813 on: October 10, 2013, 05:53:55 pm »

*turns to Dodo*

Told you it would work! They don't remember a thing. Now keep your cake-hole shut, a talking dodo is not something we want to explain - not without explaining where they've been for the last six months.....and why...

No, best they don't find out about the other two.

*dodo nods head in agreement*

Think the Gibbous will keep to the agreement?

*Dodo nods*

Good...
Logged
Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
**
United Kingdom United Kingdom


09madasafish
« Reply #814 on: October 10, 2013, 06:15:25 pm »

*shuffles uncomfortably*

Ahem, well blackmail is such a dirty dirty word, not as dirty as the one I just thought of, but dirty none the less.  Of course sir is clearly such a connoisseur of such material that he would treat it with the discretion it deserved.

To you sir three for a pound.....

Now take your hand off my flaps.



Blackmail isn't a dirty word Sir. Now Latrine, that's a dirty word!  Grin

And I course I would treat such material with discretion (it wouldn't be of any use for blackmail if EVERYONE knew about it). I'll take 5 pounds worth good sir. And I shall release your flaps when I have said material in my possession.
Logged
Alexis Voltaire
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


Shàlle We Dànce?


« Reply #815 on: October 10, 2013, 09:50:46 pm »

*The Gibbous pauses in as it oozes across the ceiling, and makes an affirmative squeak. It then tilts a pseudopod downward and to one side, and makes a short chattering, glopping sound.*

Yes, even the bit with the spoon and the rubber tree. Don't remind us, please. The memory lock isn't that stable.

*Alexis looks back down to the dogeared magazine she's holding, flips through a few pages, and tosses it aside in disgust. The next small book she picks up from the pile near her chair gets the same treatment.* Not even anything indecent worth reading, unless you like pinups of .... chickens... ?
Logged
Siliconous Skumins
Server Monk
Governor
Rogue Ætherlord
****
United Kingdom United Kingdom



« Reply #816 on: October 10, 2013, 10:45:40 pm »

Ohhh... You remember the rubber tree incident?

*sigh* I'm not too surprised really, I tried erasing it from my own mind, without much luck. I think I will need therapy to deal with that.



I still maintain one of us has a sick mind - THAT is not what a rubber tree is or looks like!....

*shudders at the mental flashback, and fights the urge vomit*
Logged
Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
**
United Kingdom United Kingdom


09madasafish
« Reply #817 on: October 10, 2013, 11:26:53 pm »

Ohhh... You remember the rubber tree incident?

*sigh* I'm not too surprised really, I tried erasing it from my own mind, without much luck. I think I will need therapy to deal with that.



I still maintain one of us has a sick mind - THAT is not what a rubber tree is or looks like!....

*shudders at the mental flashback, and fights the urge vomit*

I know *I* have a sick mind, but that is my business Sir, as a man's mind is his own private Kingdom
Logged
Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #818 on: October 13, 2013, 12:59:08 am »

* rubs the large bruise on the back of his scone tenderly*

Remind me never to go to a place where your thoughts create things... some things are better kept within one's own skull.

I can only apologise again for that thing about the custard pastries... I think I owe everybody at least the first round and some dry-cleaning.

Barkeep!

Logged
Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
**
United Kingdom United Kingdom


09madasafish
« Reply #819 on: October 13, 2013, 01:03:24 am »

* rubs the large bruise on the back of his scone tenderly*

Remind me never to go to a place where your thoughts create things... some things are better kept within one's own skull.

I can only apologise again for that thing about the custard pastries... I think I owe everybody at least the first round and some dry-cleaning.

Barkeep!



Mine's a gallon of best bitter with a bottle of whisky chaser
Logged
Alexis Voltaire
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


Shàlle We Dànce?


« Reply #820 on: October 13, 2013, 04:06:17 am »

... Hyperlocked Möbius Blue Glacier, touch of peach brandy, please.

*The gibbous makes a chirp and long whistle*

And a sardini for my friend
Logged
Fairley B. Strange
Zeppelin Overlord
*******
Australia Australia


Relax, I've done much dumber things and survived..


WWW
« Reply #821 on: October 13, 2013, 07:38:11 am »

Oh, that explains what these were for...

      *reaches into his left vest pocket and pulls out two slightly dented sardines, which he tosses towards the little critter.*

Hmmm...

           * slowly opens his right vest pocket and peers in dubiously*
 
                   ... I don't suppose anyone here was thinking about squashed bananas recently?
Logged
Ceir
Officer
***
United States United States


« Reply #822 on: November 23, 2013, 02:24:49 am »

*re-apparates in a single swell foop*

-o that's what happens when the chronohelix loses power mid-sequence. Sheared right off.

...what catastrophe did I miss, and where'd the dodo get off to?
Logged
Madasasteamfish
A clanger waiting to be dropped......
Board Moderator
Rogue Ætherlord
**
United Kingdom United Kingdom


09madasafish
« Reply #823 on: November 23, 2013, 12:17:18 pm »

*re-apparates in a single swell foop*

-o that's what happens when the chronohelix loses power mid-sequence. Sheared right off.

...what catastrophe did I miss, and where'd the dodo get off to?

I'm not sure. It seems to disappear from the photographic record around plate 456.  Huh
Logged
MWBailey
Rogue Ætherlord
*
United States United States


"This is the sort of thing no-one ever believes"

rtafStElmo
« Reply #824 on: November 24, 2013, 07:57:01 am »

*steps out from behind the third-level bookcase and steps off into thin air, plops into a groaning heap on the smoking room floor*

Could've sworn I had wings a minute ago. Ah, well.

*Buttons flaps down from the third level on a bizarre pair of batwings, meowing twice and settling in MW's lap as he sits in bewilderment in the floor*

Oh! hello, Buttons, what was that? Oh, no, I didn't mean to do that. I dreamt I'd grown wings and woke up believing it, I guess.

*strokes the little batwinged cat, whose wings were now neatly folded at her sides and back; she begins to purr softly, then stops and climbs up MW's arm and onto his shoulder as he stands up and walks to the bar*

I'll have a pint o' stout and the nutbowl, please. Ouch...
Logged
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