how do you deal with the inevitable hecklings?

[Flynn MacCallister]

must reiterate: pepperspray and stun-guns are fairly accepted in the eyes of the law, as well as efficient at deterring would-be attackers.

Not in the UK.

General rule about weapons is: don't carry it unless you're prepared to use it;  don't use it unless you're prepared to kill with it (pulling a weapon first can turn an argument into a life-or-death); and don't kill with it unless you're prepared to face the consequences - and you ain't, so don't carry it.

Nor Australia. Only a very small and specific group of police are even permitted tasers in this country, and there was a huge uproar about even that. Most of the police are not, and tasers are not used at all in law enforcement at this point in time. Civilians are most certainly not allowed them!

Also, I was reading about a study from the UK which implied that the likelihood of one being stabbed increased by a phenomenal amount if one carried a knife.

[Katrina Broekhart]

Do they count dropping a knife on your foot as being stabbed? I've done that countless times, and it's always been my fault.

[Flynn MacCallister]

No; this was in the sense of being attacked. Or, I suppose, someone else pulling a knife on you in defense.

[Abraxas]

mmm...I might have considered the laws being different in other countries.
here anyways, pepperspray and stun-guns are fairly-well recognized as being non-lethal, and so are more acceptable to be used in self-defense without procuring an "unnecessary use of force" charge. Of course, it does still have to be true self-defense, in that ones person is in actual danger of physical harm.
Bringing  knife to a fistfight almost invariably makes you the loser, regardless of who started it, or threatened whom.

[Zastrozzi]

Do they count dropping a knife on your foot as being stabbed? I've done that countless times, and it's always been my fault.

Ah, but surely if you dropped it, you weren't carrying it.

[Sir Nikolas Vendigroth]

I just had a horrible thought.


Steamchavs.

What a wonderful idea! High-pressure steam'll fix the problem!

This may have already been mensioned, but if you use a bicycle & stay on the road this may solve many problems:
1) peoples general attitudes to style tend to dissipate- think of some of the lycra shorts that get worn on people who really shouldn't! but they pass by with minimal harassment.
2) you're faster- if there is heckling you have no reason to pay attention or even engage said scum.
3) If people do decide to go for you, people are far more likely to take notice, especially if you are on a road.

Also the only thing I should say regarding carrying weapons is dont -even something like a cane if it is used in a fight is going to put you in a bad position in the eyes of onlookers/police. Instead if you really do need something as for whatever reason you can't avoid a scrap- use something far more innocent- I'd opt for keys as they're something that almost every person carries & so there is no way in which their use could be misconstrued- but when slipped between the fingers they can do a fair bit of dammage.

Having engaged said beasts on a bicicular conveyance, it's actually fairly easy to go right through them, like a cavalry charge. but only if you've got enough numbers on your side.

Heh, there were four of us and five of them. Three of us, myself included went straight through, scattering them, but the fourth, at the back, was knocked off, and when they saw us coming back to help him, they just ran orf.

[Random]

I've tended to make a game of it, really. When my biggest concern was violence (high school, mainly), I responded by trading on my madscientist reputation, carrying around a large metal box covered in warning stickers. Now, it's comments from passersby. My favourite response to them, to this day, was the summer that I convinced the biggest tour service to point me out as a notable eccentric. I'd just smirk and point out the passing tank, right in time for the announcement. Once I was told "It's 2006, you know.", to which I replied "My god! I'm just in time!", and took off down the street.

Basically, I try to play with them, and hopefully leave them more confused and feeling like the straightman to a joke they don't quite grasp. It tends to make them either shut up while they try to figure out what's going on, or shut up because they feel like they'll look like an idiot.

[Victoria The Mistress]

I really think we should start a movement to create and encourage more absurdity in the world.... the Lear Lifestyle perhaps? 

[Zastrozzi]

I suggest compulsory listening to The Goon Show as a start:

Eccles: I once had a green top hat with a Union Jack sticking out the top. I’ve lived!

Bluebottle: Ohh, but didn’t people laugh at you when you went out?

Eccles: Oh, I never went out. I just used to sit in my room, with a hammer, practicing Beethoven’s Fifth on my head.

Bluebottle: You must have been mad!

Eccles: Well, I wasn’t locked up in that place for nothin’...

[Gentleman-Adventurer]

I intend to rig up my hat with an mp3 player so that I can play Major Bloodnok's theme song whenever I enter a room.

Bloodnok: I'm here to destroy that last metal saxophone!

Eccles: Over my dead body!

*Blam!*

Bloodnok: That's that settled!

[Zastrozzi]

That, sir, is an idea of genius.  Take this photograph of an OBE for your services.

[rogue_designer]

I intend to rig up my hat with an mp3 player so that I can play Major Bloodnok's theme song whenever I enter a room.

Complete with Flatulence?

[Zastrozzi]

I was thinking you'd need to let off a small firework and cry  'Oooooouuueeeiiigghhhuuu...' every time.

[InquisitorLordKain]

I've tended to make a game of it, really. When my biggest concern was violence (high school, mainly), I responded by trading on my madscientist reputation, carrying around a large metal box covered in warning stickers. Now, it's comments from passersby. My favourite response to them, to this day, was the summer that I convinced the biggest tour service to point me out as a notable eccentric. I'd just smirk and point out the passing tank, right in time for the announcement. Once I was told "It's 2006, you know.", to which I replied "My god! I'm just in time!", and took off down the street.

Basically, I try to play with them, and hopefully leave them more confused and feeling like the straightman to a joke they don't quite grasp. It tends to make them either shut up while they try to figure out what's going on, or shut up because they feel like they'll look like an idiot.

LOL!!!

I usually carry a large metal breifcase with two coded locks on it...used it for magic (I do magic for parties/etc) but now for other things...people used to joke around with me about what weapon am I carrying today, even the security guards joked around with me...course it always worked when I wanted to scare people, as I carried a "missile launch request form" that I got off a military site(it's just a sample form...not real...but whoever reads the fine print). All I'd have to do is open up the case and ask "and your home...where is it again?"

[Victoria The Mistress]

I reckon, that if we proposed an official and scholarly enough looking paper on dealing with Anti-Social behaviour via Absurdity, and the benefits of society, to the appropriate government depratment, (Freudian mispell  ) within a few weeks it would be rolled out in all seriousness alongside the "Hug A Hoody" initiative and "Have a Lollipop when you leave the pub - this nice copper in riot gear will give you one while smiling nicely" implementation.

But it would then have to be dumbed down and made inclusive so no-one was offended or left out.

I'd just love to see the results..... 

[Zwack]

The results would be mandatory nonsense training for public servants and they would be given standard nonsense phrases to use when dealing with the public...

In other words nobody would notice any difference.   

Z.

[Victoria The Mistress]

*Slaps Forehead*

Of course - it's called political correctness. 

[Magister]

In my experience, those who regularly see a person acting or dressing odd, will soon weary of poking fun if you simply persist.

Of course, if the locals really are packed with enough hostility to beat odd passers to death, my advice would be don't dress oddly then, at least not in that neighborhood. Save it for special occasions with groups and what-not.

In my old age, I've learned that no amount of training or gear can save you from a group set on causing you bodily harm. Your training can fail you if you are taken by surprise, and any weapon you bring can be turned against you, if not by your enemies, than undoubtedly by a court of law. (Ie: if you manage to fight off your attackers with a weapon, police will arrest YOU for assault instead of them, because would look like you were the one spoiling for a fight.)

Generally speaking anything you pull against a potential attacker, if it fails to incapacitate them, will only make them want to hurt you more.

The best thing you can do is avoid a disturbance by staying under the radar and not provoke violent people. Failing that, you must quickly decide if running is a viable option. If that is not possible, then you have to use your head, you MIGHT be able to bluff the potential attacker(s) into believing that it's not worth coming after you.

The most clever ruse I've ever heard was developed on the spot by a close friend of mine, who was one day accosted by five large young men while walking with his girlfriend. Recognizing that the situation could not be defused verbally, nor could it be fled, nor could he risk fighting them, as he could not defend the girl from multiple assailants, he improvised a very clever bluff. He snapped out his pocket knife and cut a gash in the palm of his hand, and declared to the attackers that he had just recently found out he had HIV, and that if they attacked him he would see to it that they all left infected.

While it was an outrageous story, the men were unwilling to risk it, and my friend was able to escape with his girlfriend, and without having to risk violence.

The moral of the story is, never resort to a physical confrontation unless there is no other option, always use your head, and try anything to avoid the fight, odds are no matter how you prepare for it, if you're outnumbered, you'll probably lose, and you'll probably regret having tried to fight.

[Seaton Begg]

I reckon, that if we proposed an official and scholarly enough looking paper on dealing with Anti-Social behaviour via Absurdity, and the benefits of society, ....

I'd just love to see the results..... 

DADA doesn't speak. DADA has no fixed idea. DADA doesn't catch flies.

[Zastrozzi]

Dada is normal.  Normal is nice.

[Gentleman-Adventurer]

That, sir, is an idea of genius.  Take this photograph of an OBE for your services.

Thank you, and here's a marble statue of my acceptance.

[Zastrozzi]

That, sir, is an idea of genius.  Take this photograph of an OBE for your services.

Thank you, and here's a marble statue of my acceptance.

Many thanks.  I'll cash it later.

[Vienna Fahrmann]

     Dear Moko,

     I agree with the posters on this thread who say that ignoring any verbal heckling is the right way to go.  Unfortunately, I have a lot of experience with heckling that has turned into an assault or just plain assaults.  These don't occur specifically because I dress differently, but I think from the combination that I both dress differently and am differently abled.  The less intelligent range of humanity seems to think that walking with a cane and being female makes me a "safe and easy" target.  They happen to be wrong.  I've never lost an encounter with an attacker. 
     On the weapons question, I was taught never to carry a weapon that I was not fully trained to use, and never to engage in a fight without being willing, if necessary, to carry it to it's fullest extent. (Also, never to start a fight)  I'm trained in the use of the different canes I carry, and I think that somehow I project an attitude when I am forced to use one, that I will not shy away from injuring my attacker if they continue to attack me.  Attitude is a major factor in both avoiding and winning encounters of the more violent sort. (I know that winning is not the word I'm looking for, but suffered language failure trying to think of the correct one).  Actually, my attitude has backed a number of would-be attackers off.  I don't care if they run off yelling insults, I'm just glad they run off! 
    I was actually amused at the end of one encounter when my teenage male attacker ran off into the night yelling "That's not fair!  I thought you were SAFE!"  I still shake my head at this misguided fellows attitude that life had not treated him fairly because he failed to obtain what he wanted from me.
     
     Vienna
     

[plum phlogiston]

 Dear dear, I just got heckled while walking the small units home from school.

That really gets my goat, surely these eejits can at least leave people alone in front of their children.

I was forced to curtail my response to a very hard stare.

[Vienna Fahrmann]

     Dear Plum,

     The only upside to your recent heckling is that you showed your children how to respond to it, by your example.

     Vienna